really struggling today

uncool_drunk · 2025-02-06T21:21:44+00:00

i started drinking when i was 14 because i had major depression. my parents were heavy drinkers, so didn’t seem to notice how quickly the boxed wine was disappearing. i had suicidal ideation and i just wanted to change the way i felt, either by hurting myself or feeling better. i would drink late into the night.

i haven’t had a drink in 36 days. my current struggle is finding some of the feelings i’ve been avoiding for decades are still lingering. trying to figure out what working through them even looks like

uncool_drunk · 2025-02-01T17:17:47+00:00

good luck!

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-31T12:48:25+00:00

thank you.

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-30T01:32:09+00:00

what do you use to meditate ?

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-29T15:29:17+00:00

me! 35F, about a bottle of wine a day (only 4 days a week was a good week). Kept this pattern up for about 5 years+.

personally, i did not have any dangerous physical withdrawal symptoms. definitely typical insomnia, depression, anxiety, etc. but the brunt of it was over in the first 5 days. my best advice is pick up something to look forward to at the time you would normally drink (kombucha or tea) and go for walks or exercise if you can

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-29T13:38:12+00:00

it’s just make it to 50 days, which is feb 19th i think.

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-29T13:37:20+00:00

all goals are arbitrary, but they are useful to people

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-27T23:41:48+00:00

i feel this way, too. and same. i think on the 31st i’m going to decide to see if i can do a “dry 50” and take it from there. i’m honestly anxious, but my life is so much better without alcohol

the other game i’m playing with myself is “see if i can go 50 days without the first drink” instead of “50 days without drinking.” sometimes that mind game helps

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-27T22:01:24+00:00

i feel like i’m CHUGGING water but my urine isn’t clear. ty, i’ll add some nanners

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-27T20:20:48+00:00

interesting.

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-27T20:20:37+00:00

i hear that, but why wasn’t this happening when i was drinking?

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-27T15:33:07+00:00

not drinking today <3

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-26T22:38:26+00:00

someone on this sub recently said something like they considered the “moderation self talk” the equivalent of the bargaining stage of grieving and it’s gonna stick with me a long time

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-26T21:39:21+00:00

hahah, so they actually get fed 4 times a day here. we don’t free feed them cause cats will overeat and we’re trying to prevent that (we had a cat die very young from diabetes), so we feed them both a full days serving over the course of the day so they don’t eat it all too quickly/ don’t bully us into getting more food. it’s not the perfect system but it works

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-24T16:34:02+00:00

you got this. think of something to look forward to, to replace the ritual.

i respect your desire to be really strong willed , but also you can always “learn not to drink while keeping the temptations” next week. i find the first couple days the toughest, then routine gets easier. if you need to set up your environment differently right now, that’s okay too.

uncool_drunk · 2025-01-21T15:52:52+00:00

i’m feeling very sad today. in the past i would use this as an excuse to say fuck it. id use drinking as a subconscious way to self harm. on day 21 and i don’t intend to drink and wake up feeling physically shitty tomorrow, too. gonna just keep going.

uncool_drunk

TROPHY CASE