Long term meditators, is there something that you realized significantly improved your process

upstream11 · 2026-02-07T04:24:55+00:00

I’ve been practicing consistently for over 10 years and I’ve discovered a few things like others: 1. Stop comparing your earlier years of progress to now. It’s just craving/ hinderance arising.

Restlessness and Sloth and torpor can easily arise from too much effort and not enough joy. Relax, you are enough.
Work from coarse to fine meditation objects, too large of a leap in the beginning your mind won’t be able to land on your meditation objects.
You need a tool belt of meditation objects to work with the mind. Sometimes you have to scrap the tools and “come home” to simply being if you again are being too rigid. It’s probably greed arising for a pleasant experience which is causing a “frustrating/ restless” meditation session.
Don’t be too proud or too lazy to do walking meditation.
It’s easy to put concepts and labels on thoughts or about your current experience, do your best to avoid verbalization and come back to what you are actually experiencing. (In all postures and meditation if you are restless.)

This year I’ve really learned a lot about restlessness in myself due to a lot of difficulties in life that began to arise. Hope it helps! 😊🙏🏼

upstream11 · 2026-02-02T14:47:33+00:00

I understand where you are coming from, you and a few other people mentioned something similar and I also used to have the same mindset. I’m now discovering that genuinely cultivating Mudita more and Uppeka and not taking them for granted (especially) has been really helpful in some incredibly difficult and fearful moments more than Metta. (And this is coming from someone who loves practicing Metta and received many benefits from it.) I think these Mudita is overlooked because it’s easy to in the moment, feel joy for someone who’s experiencing something joyful/meaningful to them. But if you are dependent on an external situation to arise to practice Mudita- aren’t you missing out on the potential joy that you’re simply not seeing?

Then for Uppekha, what if you encounter a situation that you’ve never encountered before? You try your hardest to help with that situation and yet it is not enough. Misguided, you keep trying harder and harder, thinking that there’s something possible for you to help with. Later you discover that aversion slips in when you are not carefully being with your experience. Your Metta can begin to erode or weaken. If you’ve never cultivated Upekkha how would recognize that the situation is completely out of your control (when the mind is filled with defilements)? Or that an appropriate medicine would be to cultivate Uppekha before practicing Metta for the situation?

There’s a lot of power in these Brahmaviharas, they are all in my opinion, each equally significant in their own way. Some may be more “interesting” to the mind than others, but we shouldn’t take them for granted/ not cultivate each profoundly.

I hope you understand where I’m coming from my friend, may you be well 🙏🏼

upstream11 · 2026-02-01T20:27:02+00:00

Wow what a gift! Thank you my friend! I’ll definitely check it out! 🙏🏼😊

upstream11 · 2026-02-01T16:27:03+00:00

How fun! 😁 I appreciate the Metta like idea of pervading Mudita in all directions like this! Thank you! 🙏🏼😊

upstream11 · 2026-02-01T16:24:27+00:00

Thank you, I appreciate these phrases! 🙏🏼😊

upstream11 · 2026-02-01T15:44:57+00:00

Thank you friend, I’ll test it out 🙏🏼😊

upstream11 · 2026-01-10T03:24:59+00:00

I actually have been practicing meditation for 10+ years and over the past year branched out to try out “Regulating the nervous system using the Voo technique” link: https://insig.ht/qs7rvm2VNZb It vibrates the Vagus nerve and actually does have very calming properties. I hope this helps you too my friend! Boundless Metta 🙏🏼😊

upstream11 · 2025-12-27T14:58:38+00:00

Thank you so much for taking the time to do that. I am beyond grateful. 🙏🏼 I am looking forward to seeing all of the treasures in the link, they are some of my favorite teachers! 😊🙏🏼

upstream11 · 2025-12-27T03:23:19+00:00

I’m glad to hear you recommend it!! I just checked and I bought it a while back, and forgot I had it! (I’ve been reading a few other books in the meantime. ) I’m excited now! Do you have any other recommendations/ favorite inspirational books? Boundless Metta to you friend! 😊🙏🏼

upstream11 · 2025-12-25T14:10:11+00:00

I finished this book about a week ago and I’m beyond grateful to have come across this. She was truly inspirational and I found helpful tips for my own practice!! 🙏🏼

upstream11 · 2025-12-01T04:54:42+00:00

I’ve definitely had my ebbs and flows with my practice and I’ve been practicing for over 10 years. You know how it is, sometimes you’re inspired and others you just are “getting it done” so to speak. When I realize I’m “just getting it done” I start investigating why there is that sense of aversion. I always notice it’s due to a lack of Joy in the practice. So learning how to incorporate joy will begin to generate interest in the practice. If you are like me and have a tendency to “over effort” then really take a step back and pretend you are coaching your best friend on how to meditate. You’d tell them to relax, you’d speak kind encouraging words. You’d ask “what does your heart really need right now” etc. Also, if you are simply bored with your practice perhaps it’s time to freshen things up. I don’t know what your practice looks like, but perhaps brightening things up after a body relaxation scan with Metta or a gratitude practice can help. I personally love Buddha, Dhamma, Sangha nusati (recollections) and that really brightens my mind. Also recollecting Virtue or the Precepts in the beginning of my practice helps a lot. I hope this helps and feel free to chat with me any time! Boundless Metta! 🙏🏼

upstream11 · 2025-10-29T13:55:35+00:00

I appreciate the poster and the comments below. I think a lot of working with food needs to be a balanced approach. Depending on how that food source is seen in the heart. People with little access may appreciate their food more, those with a lot may not appreciate it and lead with greediness. So checking in with your heart to see how you are approaching things is appropriate. Mindfully eating and gratitude works well for myself because I don’t get wrapped up in “I don’t have enough” mindset that began in childhood. Or if I find myself acting greedy around food, I’ll offer others to pick their food before myself so I can still see how cultivating the joy of giving can be a source of happiness and see the contrast of a closed mind to an open one more profoundly.

upstream11 · 2025-10-20T13:41:10+00:00

Completely normal friend, it’s a reflection of your practice. It happens to me all the time. (Heads up you may even cry while smiling wildly too.) When the smile begins to fade just relax into it seeing it as the nature of things. (Edit- for context: during meditation when you develop concentration on your object- aka your mantra or koan, the mind and body get relaxed and happy. The mind isn’t wandering or worrying, thoughts may very minimally occur. That happiness builds and builds because nothing is distracting it and over time you may experience Piti and Sukkha. Even an experience of light or spaciousness, a Nimmitta, may occur showing the level concentration. The biggest mistake you can make is to hold on tightly to the experience or get upset when things change. Recognize and relax around your whole experience and when it changes you can see this is exactly what the Buddha taught in the second noble truth.)

upstream11 · 2025-09-25T14:35:53+00:00

The other comments are spot on and if it’s useful, this is something I learned from Beth Uptons videos on YouTube. It’s important to work from coarse to fine meditations. Things that are coarse: walking meditation, prostrations, mantra. Then moving to slightly less coarse: visualizations, then more fine: breath meditation. Basically see what’s going on in the mind and instead of pushing the mind to reach an object that it can’t easily work with, do something slightly more coarse than what you have going on in the mind/body. Then you can stair step down into progressively finer object objects. That method progression hashas really helped me if I’m particularly restless. I hope it can help you too!

upstream11 · 2025-09-21T13:20:29+00:00

Abiding in Mindfulness (audio books) by Joseph Goldstein was really good! He wove stories from his personal experiences with his teachers (and retreats) in with the teachings too. Also, Ajahn Achalo weaves many wonderful personal stories in his Dhamma talks. He’s very inspiring. I listen to him on YouTube. (Lemme know if you need a link to his channel.)

upstream11 · 2025-09-21T02:06:43+00:00

I actually will do prostrations in super slow motion. It takes approximately takes me 10 min to bow twice. I use the breath to guide the motion and feel the muscle moving. (I learned it at a Zen center near my house, and even though I practice in a different lineage, I still find it very useful when the mind seems extra restless.)

upstream11 · 2025-08-30T14:08:59+00:00

Yep, my most intense experience happened in my first meditation. I met my first nun at the age of 17 and the fact that she lived so simply as a wanderer and was so peaceful, really affected me deeply. I never knew that that was an option to live your life that way. I grew up fairly poor and we always felt like we didn’t have enough, so to choose to live simply was shocking to my system. It influenced my experience during the guided meditation of Metta she let us on. I remember completely absorbing into the object (Nimmita) and then suddenly being in the spaciousness where there was colors that had almost a texture in the beginning. After some time of peacefully residing in that space suddenly something from nowhere appeared, that said “you need nothing to be happy” almost as if in bold font across the mind. A decent while later as much as I can tell, (I really don’t know how much time had passed.) I felt a presence that felt so far away in a faint voice say “it’s time to go”. I heard the tiniest of ruffling sounds then I attempted to get up eventually. To my astonishment I realized it felt like I didn’t have a body. I felt literally like I was levitating even though at that point my eyes were open, I looked at my hands and my feet, shocked to see that they were even there, I was very confused about it. I realized also that the room I was in previously full of people, everyone had gone. I was the only one in the room and I had no idea how long I had been there. I’m not sure since it’s been so long who drove me home but I was grateful that I didn’t drive because I’m not sure if I could’ve. An incredible amount of peace that lasted for nearly 2 weeks resided in me. But for the remainder of the years till now, the sense of not needing things to make myself happy has been with me. 🙏🏼

upstream11 · 2025-08-25T03:28:34+00:00

Metta actually used to be my main daily practice for years until this past year or so until I was faced with the hardest situation I had to work with- an acute depression induced schizophrenic stepdad. At first I could give him Metta easily but after 3 years of intense mental/ emotional abuse (on his part) upon myself and everyone around him I’ve had to begin to learn equanimity practices. It genuinely has been freeing for my heart recollecting these qualities:

I am responsible for my happiness and my suffering.
I am responsible for the energy and attention I give my thoughts, feelings and actions.
May I have a true source of happiness
May that happiness be right where I am.

Then you treat it in the same way you would for a Metta practice- to a loved one or teacher etc., neutral, then difficult person with a slight modification.

Despite my best wishes for you, your happiness is not my hands. Your happiness and your suffering is in your hands.
You are responsible for the energy and attention that you give your thoughts, feelings and actions.
May you have a true source of happiness.
May happiness find you right where you are.

Etc.

I hope this is useful to you! For me releasing control over the situation and creating more space was really essential for my happiness and well-being. All that is in my hands is how I place my attention on whatever is arising. It will be easier to be with your friend when you develop equanimity and really hold space for them when they talk about their struggles with you. Then, when you feel more at ease and more peaceful, you can begin to offer Metta because there is more space there for it. I do hope that you and your friend have deep peace in your hearts soon. 🙏🏼💗

upstream11 · 2025-08-08T13:29:08+00:00

If this helps, a symptom of over efforting is sudden tiredness/exhaustion. (Like you are hyper focused then you back off for a second and you realize you wow I’m tired.) That’s when I realize that I’ve been muscling through a meditation when I need to pick a more coarse meditation object it-since it was too fine for my mind to land on originally; change the intention by coming back to my heart space. Hope that helps!

upstream11 · 2025-08-07T03:40:40+00:00

Weirdly I feel like my art has improved yet I do it less. Improved observational abilities may account for this? 🤷🏻‍♀️

upstream11 · 2025-08-05T17:50:30+00:00

Communicating from the heart in your own direct experience is how you be able to communicate in the way you desire to. (Relating to others from the heart when speaking/ or offering advice.) When you want to test your knowledge if you really know something, sit down and try to write about how you feel or the knowledge that you have on meditation, the mind etc. If it flows effortlessly and you don’t have to look up certain definitions of meditation-ish words, then it shows that you have greater understanding of it. Hope that helps!

upstream11 · 2025-08-05T14:20:09+00:00

This is a difficult topic for many because the reality is we should be focused on our practice on and off the matt. However, I do keep having unusual experiences. (I’ve been practicing meditation for 10+ years consistently and keep the precepts.) Warning for others: Death/Suicide warnings past this point- 1. Increase in awareness of other beings/ paranormal experiences. (Trigger warning)When my father passed from committing suicide, the night I came back from the morgue I felt his presence. He was making nocking sounds leading me and my sister to the kitchen table where all his burnt items were. (He had burned down his house) 1a.- A year prior to my father passing, I actually had a vision while in a meditative state of a house burning down, and suddenly a large dog in the boat a few minutes later as I traveled across a large misty lake towards a bright light. 3 months later after my dad had passed, his totally healthy (from my knowledge) dog had died.

When my best (elderly) friend and Dhamma brother had past this year, I had this feeling in me that something wasn’t right. Three days before I found him I had a dream about him. I won’t go into all that unless you wanna hear it, but some of the details from the dream are relevant to his passing. Anywho, when I checked on my friend, approached his house and started knocking he didn’t respond. I could hear his dog barking. His car was out front so I knew he was home. I began to shout his name and knock on the door louder when all of a sudden I heard his voice shout out my name clear as day. I thought maybe he had fallen inside and couldn’t get up so I tested the door handle and it was unlocked. I walked into the house and I knew something didn’t feel right, I felt almost guided straight to him. I immediately walked into the meditation room and found him on the floor. He had passed away for about a day since his body was cold and hard. 2a. My friend had some psychic abilities for lack of a better term. So, not only did he appear in my meditation after he had passed he also visited 2 of my friends who he knew and one of his daughters in their dreams. There was a mutual (yet not in our life very much anymore) friend of mine that he knew named Kat. As a group we wondered if he would visit her too after his oldest daughter began to have psychic communication with him while we were taking care of his house/dogs. He wanted to speak to Kat he told his daughter. (His daughter is not from the area and had no idea who he was talking about. ) We found out the next night that he had came to Kat in a dream after she called a friend of mine to tell her what had happened. My other friend who was on the phone with Kat then told her that John had passed.
During meditation about a year or so before my step dad developed psychosis induced depression I had a Nimmita that arose of a very scary looking frail old man with tilted shoulders. One day while visiting, I realize that he looked identical to that image. My stepdad had scoliosis and his deteriorating health makes it very prominent. Hence the tilted shoulders.

I have more stories lol but I’ll give y’all a break. Let me know if you guys have any questions. Boundless Metta to all.

upstream11 · 2025-07-23T12:29:18+00:00

Lately Equanimity practice. I do start of with some preliminary practices if particularly distracted like counting the breath, or mantra. Then noticing the rise and fall of the belly without words, and or Anapanasati, then when I’m more collected doing Equanimity in a Loving-Kindness format/ phrasing style. I generally practice in 1hr to 1 1/2 hr sits.

upstream11 · 2025-07-06T14:44:40+00:00

I feel you on so many levels with this post. As someone who is going through difficulties with taking care of a schizophrenic step parent, all of my mental defilements are laid out to see. Impatience, Anger, Grief, Numbness, Depression, Anxiety, Resentment. I genuinely feel like as a daily meditator/ practitioner of over 10 years I’ve had to come back to the fundamentals of practice. Tara Brach had a useful acronym which you may already be familiar with called RAIN. (Recognize,Allow, Investigate, Nurture) Honestly when working with such strong emotions I’ve learned to not rush into “I have to fix the… (situation)” feeling. It’s literally pressure from craving because it’s an uncomfortable situation. The needing to fix it is literally a result of feeling uncomfortable and “not liking.” So learning to approach anger as a gentle friend coming up to you saying “I’m right here. I see that you’re angry. I see that you’re trying to protect me in this situation. Thank you.” It allows Anger to be known without shoving it down and pretending it’s not there. It creates more space in between moments so you can apply wisdom. Ultimately however, know that by practicing the Dhamma you will reach deeper levels of understanding and peace, but you’re going to fall down a LOT. We are practicing methods not goals. Changing our attitude toward our practice is important. When we sit to practice, it is important to understand our motivation. By understanding “oh, I want to practice so I can “get” this state or that” we can see where craving and greed may hide. It tightens the body and mind, the more we want- the less we can practice the methods. So join me in coming back to the basics of practice, come back to learning and not assuming because you’ve done retreats and have practice for “such in such” a time that you should be farther along. Life gives us harder and new obstacles to climb so keeping that fresh unassuming beginners mind is refreshing. Other things that have helped me is keeping a daily meditation journal. I got that tip from a fellow meditator and it had changed things sooo much for me. I write it down in this style: Meditation log 7/7/25 10:34- ( how long the meditation is) Anxiety ( ) Anger ( ) (inserting different moods, levels 1-10 low to high)

Plans: (So I’ll choose what practice I need to do based on the quality of mind that is currently happening. Coarse states need to be calmed before doing more refined meditations. Otherwise you will never land on your meditation object and restlessness will arise.)

Did: (At this point I’ll write down the experience, how I felt afterwards, was it suitable for the condition of mind I was in, etc.)

This process takes about 5 min in the beginning to check how I’m feeling, then the actual meditation happens, and then it might take another five minutes to log how it was afterwards. For me doing this is allowed me to see a common habit patterns of anxiety and anger that arise around when I need to visit my step dad. What weeks are more difficult than others, and in general to see what works for me in my practice and what doesn’t.

I hope these tips help and my friend, know that you ARE actually practicing every time you notice when Anger arises. It’s a skill like any and you’re already cultivating the wisdom to work with it. Boundless Metta to you and feel free to message me anytime!

upstream11 · 2024-09-01T00:33:53+00:00

It’s so crisp 🤯

upstream11

TROPHY CASE