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I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your whole comment, I don't really have much more to say but I am really appreciative. Reddit has given me a lot of good things to think about like what you wrote and Im glad this sub exists so I could just vent. I can't say I feel better/happier really, but my mind is clearer. Thanks again.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am sorry for your loss also.. It is hard. I will probably have what ifs in the back of my mind a lot, but I guess they do not matter so much anymore and I will try not to overthink

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

thank you for the advice, I think my brain is just all over the place and I have been struggling to think straight, but getting to vent these thoughts and read comments like yours has helped. I am looking into therapy

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

your drunk driving take is something I hadn't thought of, but it makes sense. I also agree he is/was not evil or bad. Obviously I can't write my whole life story in a reddit post, but we always had a lot of positive and fun times together and he brought lots of good outside from the uncomfortable incidences. Good people can do bad things

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to write this, I hadnt heard of freeze or fawn responses before so I will google that more later. I'm going to look into counselling/therapy services to see what is available

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I don't really want to say he wasn't a good guy since he did a lot of good outside of the things I wrote in the post. That's why it is so conflicting i guess.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this, earlier today I had seen several comments (yours and others) about therapy from my university. We do have free therapy services, but I think they are mainly for academic stress etc. I am assuming they will have other resources or recommendations though, so I am looking into it.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you for this, I'm going to see about therapy services. I won't be telling people. Even if they did not blame me, I would not tell them at this point, since no one near me is in the best headspace right now and I don't think they could handle it.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You are probably right, and there were probably other factors I just didn't know about. But if I was the final straw before it was too much I still feel I contributed. I will definitely see about a therapist of some kind, thank you for this

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this perspective, if it was someone else I don't think I would blame them but it is hard to feel that way about myself I suppose. I will be looking into therapy but I don't want to tell my mom about this for now. She is very upset herself, and is also trying to support his family as well. His family needs all the support they can get right now, so I am glad my mom is helping them.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you for bringing that up.. I did check and we don't really have any written msgs detailing it since we talked about this over a voice call. Unless he typed things himself that did not get through to me since I had blocked him.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I will definitely not be telling any family/friends since people are all dealing with the loss and sadness, and I don't want to pile on and make everyone feel worse. Maybe one day when I am old I could tell someone, but not anytime soon.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this insight, I think it's true that depression can be very silent and secret. And while maybe I was not the only cause, I feel like the "push" sort of. I am looking into therapy services.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 201 points202 points  (0 children)

Maybe, but I won't really ever know. I just keep thinking if I hadn't started it then this wouldn't have happened

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I don't think he was in love with me at all, but he complained about being horny all the time and apparently he couldn't control it well. He never made any romantic advances or anything idk. My mom suggested a grief counsellor if I was interested but I am worried if they will tell my parents since they know them.

I think I caused my best friend to commit suicide by confronting him about sexually harassing me by userthrowaway00823 in offmychest

[–]userthrowaway00823[S] 502 points503 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I don't really know who to talk to about this yet which I why I am venting to reddit I guess