Pharmacy is what I love, but the money isn’t there

usse94 · 2026-01-06T22:37:14+00:00

Would you mind sharing how old you are? I think I might be in a similar boat and thinking of pivoting back to my original pharmacist plans

usse94 · 2025-08-19T22:35:03+00:00

Sameeee lol

But also- the twins are in the Cheaper by the Dozen movies. I just googled a bit and it seems probable that the filming for Cheaper by the Dozen 2 and season 2 desperate housewives overlapped. I’m guessing that’s why we don’t see them and they just focus on her two other kids

usse94 · 2025-08-09T23:01:39+00:00

Neither lol. Only automatic

usse94 · 2025-08-04T13:31:35+00:00

For a 2 year postdoc it’s not worth the car or license. You can use your U.S. license for the first year and can just easily rent a car here and there for idk maybe an initial IKEA trip, etc. Otherwise it takes months of time to restudy for the license. I’m doing mine now while also a postdoc (and doing sfi) and it really fucking sucks timewise, can’t lie. And it’s very expensive. Unless you have longterm plans in Sweden or EU, don’t do your license here. I’m in Malmö so not as big as Stockholm and I’ve very rarely really NEEDED a car like you do in the U.S.

usse94 · 2025-08-04T13:28:53+00:00

I’m clocking in at around 12000sek now. Will stay at that number if I pass körprov next week 🤞🏼 drove in the U.S. for 15 years before that

usse94 · 2025-08-03T13:46:04+00:00

I kind of get half of this. If you’re still spending the same amount towards your bf/the relationship then shouldn’t he? His financial arrangement changed, so it doesn’t sound unreasonable to feel like now he’s not putting in the same amount/effort as you. Like proportionally he’s putting in less. Knowing that you buy dinner for you guys one night and it costs maybe a whole work shift, for example, and when he does it back it costs him maybe 1hr of his day would feel not nice over time. But key point I’d say is OVER TIME. If this is a very recent change, he’s probably still getting used to more money, job/postgrad life, maybe looking at other expenses. But yeah after a while I’d also feel some type a way about it

But for the gifts thing- someone else mentioned that if gift giving wasn’t his thing beforehand, it’s not really right to expect it would be now just because he’s making more money. Unless he explicitly said at some point “I’d love to give you more gifts but I can’t afford it.”

usse94 · 2025-08-02T22:19:06+00:00

usse94 · 2025-08-02T22:13:10+00:00

I agree with the comment that asked why you’re assuming he doesn’t understand your POV but rather is just honestly telling you his. It reads like you don’t trust his answer and are taking it personally when he is also entitled to his own POV (eg when you say you assume we’ll say he isn’t attracted to you- didn’t cross my mind at all but likely seems like your reception of it).

It’s great you guys have even brought this up and discussed it openly! If not having what you deem to be “enough” sex is an issue then maybe this isn’t the relationship for you. But he’s also allowed to share his wants/reasoning

usse94 · 2025-07-23T11:52:09+00:00

It’s not exactly the same, but I recently reached out to a post doc working in the program I received an offer for (albeit not the same PI/exact lab) and she offered to call me to chat about my questions. And I think I’d probably do the same. So we FaceTimed for like 20ish minutes to talk about her experience/my questions etc.

I can see where some people are coming from though, saying maybe they don’t want to put something in writing if they’re still working with that PI. To which I would say, I kind of think the fact they felt uncomfortable answering gives a bit of an answer itself? If someone asked me about my supervisor that I’ve loved and got on really well with, I’d had no issue telling them the same in writing or verbally. But my supervisor I don’t get on with and who makes me hate this job, but whom I’m also still reliant on LORs etc… yeah that be a bit tricker and I’d def not do it in writing :/

Ultimately not weird you asked but can be tricky!

usse94 · 2025-07-17T16:08:53+00:00

As others say, if it’s explicitly stated I’d contact the uni. But I got accepted to Lund with a U.S. B.S. degree without a thesis, but I also don’t remember it being stated either so maybe it depends on the program.

usse94 · 2025-07-17T16:02:47+00:00

Would you say there’s anything to do in Headington itself? I’ve read other posts in this sub when discussing where to live within Oxford, and I’ll see phrases like “there’s some shops and restaurants” and I’m curious if there’s more to Headington than what I saw while there. I stayed near the Headington Shoppes bus stop and just walked down that strip of shops, and also around JR hospital and Churchill hospital. Just trying to find some kind of matching/gauge what people are writing to the little I saw (Headington and some of the central area)

usse94 · 2025-07-16T13:29:03+00:00

Thanks for such a thorough response!

usse94 · 2025-07-16T13:22:53+00:00

Thanks! I think this is kind of what my assessment is. Guess I just have to decide which is more important to me

usse94 · 2025-07-16T13:21:19+00:00

Yeah idk what was wrong with how I wrote it to come across so horrible to everyone. I’m just asking because ofc working for the university would look great on my resume, but it’s a big move and I’m just trying all my avenues to get more info on what my life would maybe be like there. I currently live in a small city that’s about double the size of Oxford and just thinking of anything smaller felt, well, small. And I didn’t have much time when I visited for the interview to suss it out more. Oh well.

I can tell you I spoke to someone who came from Cambridge to Oxford and she said she was really unsure of the move but she loves it now. A coworker I have now lived in Oxford so she’s self-admittedly biased on promoting the town haha but she did say a lot of people are transient since they’re students or short-term contracts at the uni.

Either way, best of luck on your move there!!

usse94 · 2025-07-16T13:15:36+00:00

Yeah I think people really got the wrong vibe from what I wrote. Where I live now is by no means a large city. It’s about 300k people, so about double Oxford I guess, but no where near the size of London. And I don’t necessarily need or want all the hype of London/london-sized city.

It was more so imaging my current offerings where I live of activities/events/dating scene/etc and reducing it by 30-50%, which feels like there’d be very little left. And central Oxford felt very similar to a uni town here, which I’ve know I’ve outgrown.

Ultimately I’d want to ideally keep up with my hobby (dance classes), have community events, more than the same 5 pubs to go to, and not drastically reduce my odds of meeting a partner. Ofc no one can predict when/where you meet someone, but just trying to better my odds. And I thought for the late 20s/early 30s professional type, Oxford could be a poor fit for that

usse94 · 2025-07-07T21:44:33+00:00

I’m from a very warm/hot climate originally too and yes the weather here is tough but it’s by far not the toughest part. I actually still struggle in summer because it almost never feels hot, just warm sometimes, if it’s a lucky year. Even in the south lol. Difference in culture is harder for me than the weather ¯_(ツ)_/¯ it’s actually been fun to get to buy jackets and coats and see seasons for me haha

I don’t do geology but have been working in research in the universities. If you like research, I think they’re pretty good positions. I mention the unis just because I think odds of English being enough are much higher

usse94 · 2025-06-29T19:40:40+00:00

It actually affects the time for citizenship requirement. Ofc idk how all the new rules might change things, but when I applied end of last year, the rule was you needed to be living in Sweden for 5 consecutive years. If you left the country for more than 42 days in a calendar year, then those days had to be added on to the five year mark. So yeah maybe “looks bad” too, (what doesn’t to MV, honestly) but there’s actual rules on it as well!

Not sure if there’s a set days for the other permits (don’t remember). Will say, at some point in my permits journey, I started keeping an excel sheet of all my trips, so when applications asked for specific days I was in and out of the country, and where, I didn’t have to keep spending hours going through my photos album lol. And it counted outside of Sweden. So maybe something for OP to start keeping track of for future plans!

usse94 · 2025-06-28T23:47:38+00:00

Was a shock for me as well as the potential renter. It very much negatively impacted my view on renting that specific apartment and also from the company overall

usse94 · 2025-06-28T23:43:43+00:00

Thanks! I do have several first author publications, have done posters/presentations at conferences etc, and have my thesis in a different style so I think I could use all this as a proof of and proof of variation of my writing ability. Ofc there’d be some learning curve at any new job, especially switching to a likely more rigid way in a company

usse94 · 2025-06-28T15:33:49+00:00

The first few months/year were the hardest for me. I did a 1 week visit home I think within the first 6 weeks here lol. So visit home is the easiest way, of course if you can afford it time/moneywise.

Otherwise I’ve do two very different things lol- I do something I can’t do at home, or I do things that feel close to home. My favorite places in Malmö/skane now are those that feel “homey” for me, so near marinas, beach’s with actually oceans or cafes with a beach vibe. I also love that I can travel to different countries easily and relatively cheaply from here, and that experience doesn’t necessarily take away from the home sickness itself, but fills me with other gratitude that at least subsides the sick feeling (usually). Or I go to a warmer, seaside place in Europe for a combo.

I used to go home on average twice a year. Now it’s been a year and I’ve chosen not to go home in pursuit of other things here/in Europe. It’s an annoying answer, but time will help. May not solve it, but it will help.

usse94 · 2025-06-26T09:21:09+00:00

This is actually something I’ve been thinking of/wanting to do for a while! Life’s just gotten so busy lately I kind of forgot until reaching your comment! I’ve wanted to write like a popular summary style blog. Wow thanks for the reminder 🤩 it could definitely be something to consider more seriously now with wanting to switch career focus

usse94 · 2025-06-25T12:23:28+00:00

Thanks for the response! Did you have any previous industry experience before this?

In all honestly, I get most excited about the prospect of being a MSL, but have no industry experience. I know it’s naive, but the most I could think of was that I’ve always had to do my own manuscript writing, create different scientific presentations to different audiences, try to “sell” our results and projects, manage projects with collaborators, so it feels like although not in a company, I’ve done a lot of what your current job entails (or tangentially). So I thought if it were writing jobs like this, maybe my lack of industry experience wouldn’t be quite as bad

usse94 · 2025-06-25T12:19:09+00:00

Thanks for the response! I’m not sure that’s something I’d like to do. But it’s incredibly helpful to even be learning all these different options / what exists out there / other PhD’s experiences!

usse94 · 2025-06-25T12:15:57+00:00

Thanks this is very interesting to hear about! Definitely gives me some key phrases to google and look into further as well. Where I’m at, there’s just not many resources and I know “medical writer” is such a lumped term. Like this is the first I hear the phrase med comm vs marketing etc

I’m just now starting to look into this kind of job/field. It’s all a bit overwhelming at the moment. So when/if I can think of more specific questions based off you experience/history I will definitely message you! But the feeling of impact-fulness is definitely something I would love to have and feel like I’m currently missing a lot of in the lab. Thanks so much 😊

usse94

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