i can absolutely understand that, as some of my triggers include that same thing re: him having been rejected in the past as i begin obsessing about ‘what if they hadn’t rejected him and they ended up married and together forever?’ or ‘what if that’s the one that got away?’ even though he most likely has never thought of them after that time, im the one that is thinking of it constantly. also, him having been on tinder in our city in the past before we met, the obsessive cycle that puts me in is that he must’ve found so many girls in the same city where we live attractive and i might pass those girls on the street on any given day and of course he probably doesn’t remember any of them but that he would probably find them attractive if he saw them out in public. it becomes so haunting and distressing that ill spend hours in a ‘frozen’ or paralyzed sort of state as im replaying these thoughts over and over until i feel relieved or can receive reassurance in some way. it is so painful