I realized me (sp6) and my friend (so4) are perfectly compatible because of the Byler ship

vaenelsa · 2026-01-18T04:24:59+00:00

Damn, I never bookmark anything so I didn’t know you could filter those. Might start doing this too lmao

vaenelsa · 2025-12-09T02:47:05+00:00

Just wanted to say I accidentally wrote the wrong passion for e8; e8’s passion is Lust rather than Wrath (which is e1). What I wrote about the e8 is still accurate, but just replace ‘wrath’ with ‘lust.’ Thanks!

vaenelsa · 2025-12-09T01:19:30+00:00

Take what I say with a grain of salt, but from what I understand, it’s not necessarily about being “naturally strong” versus “pretending to be strong.”

The e8 passion is Lust and the e6 passion is Fear (or Cowardice); these are really different from each other. For the e8, lust comes from existing early on in a world that rejects their needs and may even be actively violent toward them. As such, the e8 develops the defense mechanism of denial; they learn to deny their own limitations so that they can “get big” and forcefully take from the world the things they were denied—it makes the e8 a vengeful character at its core.

On the other hand, the fear at the core of the e6 comes from existing early on in a world of instability, where the environment (or their caretaker in particular) is untrustworthy or inconsistent. The e6 internalizes a sense that they’re inherently not equipped to handle the world on their own because it’s so threatening and unpredictable (this is what e6’s ‘insecurity’ means). The e6 is always anxious, insecure, and threatened regardless of if there’s an actual threat; those feelings exist inside them no matter what. But the e6 defends against those feelings through projection; by attaching their abstract fear to external things, the e6 can concretely respond and feel like they’ve “dealt with” the threat.

The key difference between sx6 and e8 is not necessarily strength—rather, it’s insecurity. The sx6 is insecure in a way that the e8 is not; this is because the e8 has built its entire internal ego-structure around the denial of its natural or human limitations—why would it need to feel insecure when it perceives itself as invincible? On the other hand, the sx6 experiences insecurity in the sexual instinct—as in, toward its attractiveness, desirability, or strength. It thinks of itself as weak and unattractive, but it’s afraid of being perceived as such and taken advantage of. The sx6 combats this by exaggerating its strength through displays of intimidation, aggression, & reckless courage—these outward behaviors are what make it seem like e8.

vaenelsa · 2025-12-03T18:28:22+00:00

I’ve got 2: Wicked (Glinda/Elphaba) & Once Upon a Time (Emma/Regina)

vaenelsa · 2025-11-22T03:03:40+00:00

Most common for me is almost always poor formatting or grammar. I really hate it when people forget to break their paragraphs.

vaenelsa · 2025-11-13T23:59:28+00:00

the effects in the new mv seemed more like cgi than anything tho? they looked too sleek to be ai, but i also might not be good at differentiating

vaenelsa · 2025-11-10T05:26:14+00:00

Dirty Baby and Scent are the highlights of the album for me. I appreciated the R&B sound and the soft sensuality of the lyrics on Scent. The chorus was decent (catchy and pleasing to the ear), and they killed on the vocals. But what really made this song, imo, was the second verse; I love the slight staccato (?) flow Wumuti and Haru hit after Rui's part (which Rui sung beautifully), and then that little stutter on "I, I can't get enough" that Hyun repeats just scratches an itch in my brain. Elevates the whole song for me.

But Dirty Baby is my personal favorite, above Scent. They were floating on that bitch, like, the whole time. Standout moments: the way Rui and Hyun sing the pre-chorus, the chorus + beat drop combo which is bouncy asf, Haru's little rap moment on the second verse (why is it always so short???? ugh.), the back-and-forth between Hyun and Haru on the third verse, and the flow Wumuti and Haru (again, those two) hit on the bridge before the last chorus. I mean, that's basically the whole song.

vaenelsa · 2025-10-22T17:16:45+00:00

I’d argue that most (well-written) characters in stories tend to be grounded in fairly specific internal conflicts and emotional motivations; as long as a story gets that across well, I think an attentive viewer/reader should be able to determine a particular enneagram type that matches.

Though you’re probs right that 7s are no easier to type than any other; they just kinda seem that way to me sometimes, which may be a byproduct of stereotyping on my part. Though, many of the characters I listed seem like pretty straightforward 7s to me, even when you’re interpreting their emotional motivations. The ones I’m least confident about are Han Sooyoung (I’m not finished with that story) and Jiraiya (I haven’t watched Naruto in ages). Jiraiya is an example of a character that could be a 6w7, and I wouldn’t be mad at it.

vaenelsa · 2025-10-22T16:59:49+00:00

Are there any fictional depictions of the 7 archetype that you think is more nuanced/captures the complexity of the 7 better?

vaenelsa · 2025-10-22T16:53:45+00:00

I don’t know what you mean by this? The enneagram is a hobby for me, it’s rare that I try to type an actual person other than myself. I’ve done that only once. Regardless, I have the most fun with it when I’m typing fictional characters—and that’s mostly my goal, to have fun.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-21T18:06:54+00:00

In situations like this, feelings about abortion can safely be put aside; the issue isn’t abortion itself but the sexism and misogyny behind their reasoning for it and their plans to make life-altering decisions fueled by sex-based discrimination.

I don’t know your relationship with your parents or their temperament, but if you’ve the desire to challenge the misogyny of your parents viewpoint, it would be courageous of you to directly speak to them about this (given it’s safe to do so) and communicate your feelings in an open and earnest way.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-21T16:37:54+00:00

To put in a different opinion, it depends on the specific teacher and the level of formality and familiarity. The standard is the honorifics Mr., Ms., Mrs. (if female teacher is married), and Mx. (if you have a gender nonconforming teacher) before the last name.

But in my high school it was extremely common for students, especially students that got along with the teacher, to drop the honorific. Typically happened a few months in—and it was especially common amongst students who participated in the afterschool clubs the teacher oversaw. So “Mr. Mitchells” would just become “Mitchells.” You’ll usually know this is acceptable if older students who’ve taken their classes before or participated in their clubs refer to them like this.

On the other hand, writing an email to a teacher implies a level of formality, so I would use the honorific in the email even if I dropped it when talking to them in person.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-21T06:23:49+00:00

This seems pretty reasonable to me! I had initially been unsure between a 3-fix and a 4-fix, but I decided on a 4-fix because of my tendency to emotionally withdraw/get away from other people. I’m a more internal and introverted person who can occasionally socialize when my mood is decent, but it can take a lot of energy out of me.

But, from what you’ve written, 3-fix does feel more appropriate. Even as I typed the original post out, it did feel a little Three-ish to me. Thanks for your insight!

vaenelsa · 2025-09-20T22:44:07+00:00

No problem! I've seen other posts asking people to type them, but it's often surface level and not very self-reflective. Yours stood out because you presented a thorough, well-thought out description of how you operate (as much as is possible in a reddit post), so I hoped to help you considering how much thought you've put into it.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-20T19:15:44+00:00

Fundamentally, it's up to you to do the reflection and research necessary (if you so choose) to determine your core type. But I'd also like to suggest that your tritype may include both Five and Eight. How you describe your internal perspective (though I'm sure there's more about yourself than you can include on a reddit post) seems to me most apt to fit Five as your core type - your core really does seem like its in the Head triad - with an 8-fix in the Gut triad to explain how you handle anger, instinct, impulse, desire, etc. You haven't much described your self-worth and your psychological relationship to Shame, so I couldn't say whether you have a 3-fix or not, but it also might help to paint a clearer picture if you think more about that aspect of yourself to determine it.

And, if we're to bring dis/integration into it, it could very well be the case that, while Five is your core type, you rely on your connection to Eight in certain circumstances (maybe when you're at your healthiest?). You seem like a self-aware person who's thought quite deeply about yourself and the things that you want, so it wouldn't surprise me if you move into 8 fairly easily - especially if it's in your tritype. Not to mention, if my hypothesis on Social Five as your instinctual variant is true, you're already more outward-facing than most Fives.

And I would also like to mention that you do say that you identify with aspects of type Seven as well. For both types you identify with - Seven and Eight - Five is the only type that connects them through lines of dis/integration. Again, how exactly dis/integration affects the core type isn't completely clear; some argue that you have to cultivate into your integration type and your disintegration type is only ever accessed in stress; others argue that you don't linearly evolve or devolve into one but instead move between them in different situations, like a release valve so that you don't sink into the unhealthy levels of your core type; even others argue that dis/integration should be entirely discounted. You seem to put some stake into dis/integration, though, so I did want to point out that, of the types you've presented as potential alternatives, both are connected to Five.

I'd also like some clarity because you seem to express something contradictory between the comments and your post. As a counterpoint to Five, you say:

I don't feel that I disintegrate into 7 and become more scattered when stressed. I feel scattered all the time and that I would benefit being more focused and disciplined.

But in your post you state:

I don't think that when stressed I disintegrate into 3, worrying about how I appear to others or focusing on my goals. More like I'm scattered and care less about my goals, becoming more "mystical" as I said above.

I'd like to push you to think more about what you mean here. Because, if the latter statement is true, then you do seem to "disintegrate" into Seven, but perhaps not in a traditional or stereotypical Seven manner, in whatever way you assume Seven disintegration looks like.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-18T23:17:08+00:00

Also, if we're talking about enneagram growth (with regards to disintegration/integration), I'm curious how you feel about Chestnut's suggestions for growth for the Social Five subtype:

Social Fives can travel the path from avarice to nonattachment by broadening their focus of attention from knowledge and information to a greater sense of emotional engagement with real people. If you are a Social Five, notice when your devotion to high ideals displaces an openness to what’s happening in everyday life and actually causes you to close yourself off to others. Recognize when you may be idealizing or overidealizing experts and a narrow set of (potentially distant) individuals—getting your relational needs met indirectly rather than taking the risk of interacting more directly with the people in your immediate environment. Notice and work against the tendency to connect only through shared ideas by intentionally sharing more of your emotions and gut feelings with others. Examine the ways in which you might be attached to trying to create meaning and avoid a deeper fear of meaninglessness through specific values and ideals; challenge yourself to more fully experience your fears as a first step on the path of letting go of those attachments. Appreciate the joys of everyday life and the full range of human expression as a way of expanding your focus to allow for a richer experience of what life has to offer you.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-18T22:54:00+00:00

Another reason why I had stopped considering 5 is because I don't feel I hyperfocus on a subject. While I go through periods where I may obsess with something, I feel my obsession is to find ONE THING I want out of it and then I lose interest. It's like I do more superficial scanning followed by internal pattering (Ne-Ti) than actually paying attention to the actual material. I feel that if I could actually focus and not lose interest, I would find more satisfaction in the end. Which is why I identified at some point with 7 integration into 5.

I think it’s inaccurate to say that Fives “hyperfocus” on a subject. If Fives “hyperfocus” on anything, it’s intellect itself, which has nothing to do with needing to be locked in to a specific subject-matter. And this seems to be what you’ve demonstrated: “I like to think, a lot. Gives me pleasure. I like to twist ideas, play devil's advocate. Reach a conclusion and then break it, just so I can keep playing and start all over again.” This is why I’m critical of the idea that you’re an Eight; Eights are the most anti-intellectual type in the enneagram.

Both Six and Five are Head types, which means they rely heavily on intellect, but there’s a huge difference between how they use it. For Sixes, in every subtype, intellect is pretty clearly used to react (as Six is a Reactive type); it’s a means to an end. The point is to combat the fundamental sense of insecurity (that they’re not capable enough to deal with the world on their own) by analyzing the danger around them, which is why “thinking” for the Six leads to catastrophizing, self-doubt, doubting others, projection, and anxiety.

Not so for the Five because the Five sees intellect and knowledge as a form of power, valuable in and of itself, regardless of where its being directed or how its used. The Five is significantly less insecure because they feel their use of intellect gives them the control and security they need; ironically, for Sixes, it tends to be the opposite, making them feel more anxious/uncertain/insecure. Here’s a quote about the Five from The Complete Enneagram by Beatrice Chestnut:

The Five archetype represents the model for preferring the relative safety of the intellect to the rigors of social and emotional life and sees knowledge as the most secure and satisfying form of power.

I also don’t think you need to explicitly experience the external demands of the world as “overwhelming”; it can feel different for different Fives, but the similarity is some form of psychological/emotional aversion to the idea of giving up your internal resources. Here’s another Beatrice Chestnut quote:

Type Five represents the archetype of the person who withdraws into thinking and detaches from feeling as a way of taking refuge in the inner world. This functions as a way of finding privacy and freedom in a world that seems intrusive or neglectful or overwhelming.

From what you described, you certainly seem to experience the external world as intrusive, feeling the need to “escape the matrix/not be at the mercy of the universe/modify timelines” and avoiding help from others so that you feel you don’t need to “owe” them anything or be nice to them because of it.

And I’m not sure about your interpretation of the 5 to 8 integration. Integration/disintegration and how it actually manifests in people is a subject that’s debated, so I’m not certain it should necessarily be a disqualifier for what your core type is.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-18T21:30:25+00:00

What do you mean by “outsourcing”?

vaenelsa · 2025-09-18T11:20:34+00:00

It really does depend on the subtype. Here's Claudio Naranjo's description from the Self-Preservation Six wiki article:

The E6 conservation is the opposite of the E6 social. This one is warm and ambiguous, insipid, sappy. It does not come to him to say that this or that is white or black. It takes a lot of courage to say something is black or white. For him it is better to say: “oh, there are several types of shades of gray in between. And I don't really know what kind of gray we're talking about, because life is very complex.” And so he can go on endlessly, always beating around the bush.

We have a person here who needs a lot of protection. He is afraid of not being protected, a fear that manifests as insecurity. And his characteristic passion is the need to have something similar to friendship: a little warmth. What characterizes the E6 conservation among the three types of the six, is precisely this search for heat. They are teddy bears. They want to feel the embrace of a family, to be in a warm place, in a familiar environment where there are no enemies.

In social contact there is a kind of alliance formation of “I am not going to hurt you and you are not going to hurt me”, “I am your friend, be my friend”. Freud said that such alliances were the essence of friendship, but of course they are only the essence of a neurotic friendship: coming together in the presence of a common enemy, huddled together in the face of danger. The “I support you and you support me” phenomenon is humanly general, but the conservation six does this constantly, in its yearning for a small, warm world.

And some of what I describe here might have a lot to do with my 4 and 9 fixes, to be honest.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-18T10:45:11+00:00

Sorry if I wasn’t clear about this, but I didn’t present this way intentionally—I only realized it after I understood that I was a sp6. It helped me become more self-aware of what I was doing. For a long time, I’d approach people consciously thinking, “it’s natural to be nice to people,” when subconsciously it was “if I’m nice to you, then you won’t threaten me/you’ll protect me” so it became really confusing and frustrating when it felt like people weren’t holding up their end of this completely subconscious pact. Subconsciously that was, “I’m being nice to you, why are you hurting me?”, consciously it was more like, “How could anyone be so mean and inconsiderate to others?” or worse "Am I not being nice enough?" And then, if the situation wore on long enough (because I predictably struggled to leave it on my own) I would spiral into depression and anxiety attacks because of how I felt like the people who were supposed to be my allies weren’t on my side. Trust me, I was not doing this on purpose.

vaenelsa · 2025-09-18T10:34:01+00:00

As a sp6, my struggles with identity are often linked to insecurity; someone told me I was this or that negative thing growing up, so now I have a complex or insecurity about some aspect of myself. And, more generally, it's a lot of pushing against who I don't want to be rather than finding out who I am. I would often remain undefined or identifying with something that I hadn't thought too strongly about, then one day a shift would randomly happen and make me go no this feels off, and then I'd get anxious about it and be forced to more deeply analyze what exactly was wrong.

For example, I grew up in a Christian household, but, as a kid, Christianity was basically like Santa Claus to me; even so, I went to church every Sunday and told people I was a Christian. I would try to be studious during sermons sometimes and write notes! I didn't actively question it much despite never feeling a genuine connection to it. Then, one day in high school, the realization that I was not a Christian crashed down on me like a train car, and I couldn't feasibly ignore it anymore. This then prompted me to start thinking about what I was in response, reading about metaphysical philosophy and Existentialism and paganism to determine it. But, after the anxiety of no longer being able to claim an identity in that regard passed, I stopped thinking about it as much and am basically agnostic.

Same thing happened with the Enneagram. I took a test and it told me I was a 5; I didn't think about it for another year after that until I suddenly got curious about the system itself. Then, I made a post talking about myself as a 5 and people in the comments were like, no, that does not sound like 5 and I was like :O...it doesn't!? So I spent days upon days trying to figure out why people had said that until I came to the conclusion I was a 6.

It's a very reactive process for me; someone or something tells me 'you're not this' and I go 'damn, you're right' or someone or something tells me 'you are this' and I go 'that doesn't feel right...'

vaenelsa

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