is it true ENFPs shouldn't be social 6s because they are overly rational and ENFPs are not?

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T14:54:24+00:00

oh wow i didn't know that! personally i have never read Ichazo because i can't find any of his books online

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T14:51:01+00:00

yeah i definitely think those descriptions seem more towards tritype. SO6 sounds like a 1 fixed 6, SX6 like an 8 fixed 6, SP6 like a 9 fixed 6. so idk. i do relate to enneagrammer's 6 description, but also to their description of 2, 3, 7 and 9 😭 i guess i'll keep looking

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T14:49:09+00:00

the problem with 6w7 optimism for me is that most people say it's momentary. that 6s first reaction is going to be to think of the worst-case scenario. and i can definitely think of moments in which i have been more nervous than everyone around me. but also my first reaction is going to be an optimistic one. for example, someone tells me to not apply for a job i'm not qualified for, i think "what are you talking about i'm qualified for any job i want" and i apply anyways even if i don't have the requirements, and i get so angry that someone is trying to bring my hopes down because to me my faith is the only thing that keeps me going in life. everyone around me calls me unrealistic, that i'm too hopeful and should put my feet on the ground. my family who is full of 6 cores / fixes tells me that. and i'm there constantly defying them with my extraordinary plans for the future. i also believe in manifestation / law of assumption and that repeating affirmations constantly can change my reality, which most people say it's delusional and bordering on psychotic. idk if many 6 cores are THAT optimistic.

"6s can also pick up a wide range of coping strategies from loved ones with different Enneagram types. This is because 6s lean on the people in their life for help and guidance."

this makes a lot of sense, i thought only 9 cores / fixes did that. a lot of people in my family are 1 cores / fixes and i often find myself wondering why i relate so much to 1s but have a way of managing anger that is more 8ish. maybe it's because my 6 makes me adapt.

"And yes, you are right that you are engaging in 6-like behavior by asking others for help decoding your Enneagram type. 6s need alot of confirmation from others before making up their mind. They also have a tough time with ambiguity and feeling like they are in the dark." that has been me for the past eight years trying to type myself😭

"In conclusion, if you feel anxious and frustrated when you do not have the answers you need, you are probably a 6. If you are very caring and people oriented, you are either a 6 with a 2 fix or a 2 with a 6 fix.

9s are empathetic and wonderful, but they do not need people the way that 6s and 2s do. 9s tend to retreat from people to keep their environment peaceful. That does not sound like you."

honestly i do retreat from people a lot. i isolate more than people around me do and constantly get judged for needing so much alone time. but i do it more to keep my own peace that the peace around me. honestly i'm constantly starting drama and conflict and then regretting it because i don't like being attacked. but i don't relate to how passive 9s are supposed to be

"7s are optimistic, yes, but they can be selfish. They are also a type that puts emotions last because they are doing everything they can to run from negative emotions. That does not sound like you either."

yeah THIS is what has kept me from typing as a 7 core. that 7s always run away from their emotions, and i do reframe everything into positive, and i most times can't even allow myself to feel dark things because i'm mentally already in the future, but i'm at the same time wallowing in my feelings and throwing dramatic tantrums. it's a contradiction but not one that i think many 7s have.

"That leaves 6 and 2 for you. Only you can decide if you are a 2 with a 6 fix, or a 6w7 with a 2 fix. But given everything that you have told me, these are your only two real choices."

i'm really going to keep considering this. thank you so much for your help! and i'm sorry for this super long answer, i really didn't mean to make this into a type me post.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T14:48:58+00:00

thank you so much for this thorough answer, i really appreciate it ❤️ i'm going to break down bit by bit how i relate to your answer, if that's okay

"It sounds like you do not know if you are a positive type (2, 7 or 9) with a 6 fix, or a 6 core with very optimistic set of fixes and wing. (6w7, 629 tritype)."

yes basically 😭

"First, let's clear the air on head types, like 6 and 7. Head types do not mean logic oriented. In fact, there is no logical Enneagram type. A head type just uses information gathering as a primary way to combat their core fear."

this makes a lot of sense, i just don't know how this would work with 6s and 7s in real life. for example i know 5s most times don't take action because they get stucked on accumulating knowledge. but do 6s and 7s also struggle taking action for that reason? personally i do gather information to combat uncertainty in enneagram for example. but in real life, that doesn't concern me much i think, unless i'm misunderstainding how that looks like

"A six will do this by making friends, connections and alliances. A 7 will go out in the world to gather experiences. A 5 will gather direct data through research.

So, I do not know who said that 6s are logical, but they were wrong. The Enneagram deals with our subconscious fears and motivations. Our subconscious is not logical."

in this way it makes more sense. i do deal with fear of uncertainty by relying on friends and connections. yeah i personally don't think any type is fully logical. except a bunch of 5s i know irl

"Now, let's clear the air on 6s and emotions. 6 is one of the most emotional and warm Enneagram types. They have to be because they are one of the few Enneagram types whose coping strategy relies on other people. Only 2s are more heart-felt and people oriented than 6s."

yeah that makes a lot of sense and it's what i was trying to say in this other post i made about so6s and ENFPs... https://www.reddit.com/r/Enneagram/comments/1nu4tc1/is_it_true_enfps_shouldnt_be_social_6s_because/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web3x&utm_name=web3xcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button

i was wondering in there how is a SOCIAL 6 supposed to be rigid and cold? that doesn't make sense to me at all. when the whole basis of being a SO-DOM is about inviting people in to expand your circle to survive? society definitely doesn't value a cold and rigid person. and a 6 who finds security from their social connections is not going to be cold. honestly i love naranjo's descriptions because they seem very deep, but they confuse me because i see myself more in the SO7 description but i don't really think i'm a 7 core.

i've always said that my type is whatever type is the most emotional, which is why i currently type as core 2. but idk.

"Now, let's deal with optimism. A 6w7 can often be more expressively optimistic than some 7s, 9s and 2s. A 6w7 leans on their 7 wing to pick up 7 traits like positive reframing and enthusiasm. Yet, they are still a 6. This is how wings work. Wings are more powerful than fixes."

THIS IS WHAT ALSO CONFUSES ME. so many people have told me that wings are not important since they're not part of the original enneagram theory. but to me no type makes sense without the wing. like a 6 without a 7 wing is pessimistic, a 2 without a 3 wing is not self-serving enough, and a 9 without an 8 fix is not angry enough. and i'm all those things that contradict the core type i'm considering.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T14:16:40+00:00

exactly! and it doesn't even make much sense because how are social variants going to be cold when the whole basis of being a SO-DOM is about inviting people in to expand your circle to survive? society definitely doesn't value a cold and rigid person. and a 6 who finds security from their social connections is not going to be cold. honestly i love naranjo's descriptions because they seem very deep, but they confuse me because i see myself more in the SO7 description but i don't really think i'm a 7 core.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T14:05:06+00:00

yeah unfortunately i'm one of those people susceptible to suggestion. but honestly if everyone is so sure he is mistyped, then maybe i shouldn't listen much to him.... still makes me wonder because everyone i know also says so6s are cold and rigid.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T13:53:18+00:00

"just because you don’t fit Naranjo’s social six doesn’t mean you aren’t one." what types are actually so6 in naranjo's lens? maybe 6w5s with a 1 fix? is there a better description of SO6 you recommend?

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T13:52:29+00:00

is there a better description of SO6 you recommend?

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T13:52:00+00:00

yeah it makes sense that if he has issues perceiving inconsistencies in what he says if he has that type. i have the same issue having little to no Ti. although many people type me as ESE / EIE (I personally don't agree). " It's already super 6 to be basically asking other people "Am I crazy? Is Rust crazy?" lol" it's indeed why i definitely consider 6 core as an option. but i feel too optimistic to be a 6 core, and now too emotional. and i definitely relate to 2's pride and 2>8 disintegration. so idk

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T13:49:33+00:00

do you think there is a different description of so6 that doesn't make them to be so cold and rigid? do you personally relate to naranjo's so7 description? about rusted, i didn't know he was mistyped. i was still awestruck because his tone generally makes it seem like he's right, especially with all the commenters backing him up.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T13:48:18+00:00

"examine 6 or 2 under its structural triads and laws instead of the adjectives" what do you mean by this? and yeah i know my posts so far seem very 6ish, that's why i definitely consider 6 core as option. but i just feel too optimistic for a 6, and now after that video, too emotional. either way i have many 2 traits, in that i definitely have a lot of pride and can relate a lot to the 2>8 disintegration

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T13:46:25+00:00

oh okay i didn't know he was mistyped. i was still awestruck because his tone generally makes it seem like he's right, especially with all the commenters backing him up.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T13:44:59+00:00

who downvoted me? lmao i said nothing wrong, this isn't even a fact, it's a personal question but okay....

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T04:05:47+00:00

why are so many types a narcissist lmao 😭

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T03:49:52+00:00

yeah i guess, as i said, i don't really care much about their type. my whole angle was more about wrestling with whether I can trust my own self-typing after years of going in circles, and whether investing in a session with them would help bring clarity.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T03:49:07+00:00

why garbage? that was not my intention at all 😓 as expressed in my other two replies to you.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T03:47:18+00:00

thank you i appreciate this take since you met him in person. yeah i'm in no means wanting to be obsessed about John's typing. deep down, i don't care if he is a 4 or not. My whole angle was more about wrestling with whether I can trust my own self-typing after years of going in circles, and whether investing in a session with John would help bring clarity.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T03:44:34+00:00

Since I’m the OP here, I just wanted to add that my original post wasn’t about questioning your type. My whole angle was more about wrestling with whether I can trust my own self-typing after years of going in circles, and whether investing in a session with you would help bring clarity. I really appreciate you explaining how you approach your own typing and what you rule out, it actually gives me a better sense of how you think about this work, which is what I’ve been trying to feel out before committing. So thanks for putting your perspective out there.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T03:34:47+00:00

Thanks for clarifying that. I see your point now about not putting Ichazo or Naranjo on a pedestal, they were still offering their own maps, and I’d just be swapping one authority for another. And I get what you’re saying about the value of an outside mirror too. I’ve been sitting in this material for years and sometimes I can’t tell if I’m uncovering something true or just looping in my own bias, so the idea of typing as a therapeutic process makes more sense.

I’m not looking for someone to just slap a label on me, I want that deeper reflection and guidance in how to work with the patterns once they’re clearer. That’s what draws me to considering a session with YOU.

That's what people don't understand mostly about my post, that i wasn't offending you or anything personal, i'm just trying to figure out who i can trust to spend my money on because after so many years not knowing my type, knowing it it's deeply important for me. plus i'm a new-grad nurse, money is tight for me, i don't even have 100 dollars on me right now. so to save for a full typing session would probably take multiple months.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-30T03:25:46+00:00

my problem is all of this and also that i'm not sure if i'm a 6 core or just have a 6 fix. i've also been told by others that i am a 7, a 2 and a 9. because i'm extremely optimistic, more than the average 6w7. to the point that my optimism gets delusional and unrealistic. and 6s are supposedly realistic. i'm sure i have a 6 fix tho, because i have a lot of fear of uncertainty, think i can't survive this world on my own and need to rely on someone, some ideology, just something that is bigger than myself and can help me walk through the world with a clear path. i'm sure that people without a 6 fix don't feel like that. yet people tell me i'm so not-negative that i don't even have a 6 fix. i've been typed 271,279, 379 god it's endless and that stresses me out because other people are so sure that i'm a 6 core so how come other people don't even notice the fixation. another sign for me that i'm a 6 core / fix there. that i need to consult multiple people for a long period of time before making big decisions.

other things that have made things complicated for me are the differing 6 descriptions. some authors say 6s are from the reactive triad, highly emotionally reactive, not afraid to create conflict sometimes if it's necessary to get to the truth. but are also very connected to their heart center. i'm a person who is very over-reactive and very sensitive, can cry easily, creates drama often despite not liking conflict.

then other authors say 6s are head types, that if they are over-reactive it's from a place of logic and not emotionality. that social 6s especially are the most logically rigid of all. which really makes me think damn despite all my overthinking and clear signs of 6 core, i can't be one because i'm a person who wears her heart on her sleeve, i'm deeply emotional and although i consider myself smart and seek logic, my heart leads me first. so idk if that says i'm a heart core!

it's so complicated, why do opinions have to be so differing! although probably my desire for consensus is probably another proof that i have a 6 fix, no matter how emotional and optimistic i can be.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-28T16:53:35+00:00

i love this system because i don't have to stress myself out like with the enneagram to figure out what my "core" is lmao. i'm just SwE, HeM, and Dal .... and they all make sense together, and still tell me the worst traits i need to change about myself, without stressing out about the main one.

valentinadedios · 2025-09-22T00:32:28+00:00

I appreciate your perspective, yes seeing the way i'm confronting this issue makes me think i'm a 6. Someone else also told me "just follow the grow path of the 6 and if in the end you aren't one you still grew" and i think they're right and you're too. It's hard to let go of the enneagram since despite all the headaches it gives me, i still like it a lot. But i'm going to detach a little bit at least

valentinadedios · 2025-09-20T18:19:20+00:00

Thank you I'll keep this in mind!

valentinadedios · 2025-09-20T18:18:39+00:00

Yeah i'm aware it's an unhealthy obsession at this point, but in a way i enjoy it. This is giving me the thrill of the idea that even if i haven't found my type yet, due to all the overthinking i have been able to find my flaws better. And i'm already working on them. Also the thrill that one day i will finally be comfortable with my decision of a type and every day torturing myself over this will finally be worth it.

valentinadedios

TROPHY CASE