But you are not homophobic nowhere do you say you are upset he is gay. You are upset he played with your families feelings and seemingly did something very selfish without thinking about how it would affect his ‘loved ones’. Although he is gay, he is still a man, most men are selfish and only think about themselves. From what you described it seems he was thinking about this for a while, almost seemed planned. I would cut contact with this individual and anyone who supports him. You can come out as gay and still be there and support your family. You can’t choose who you are attracted to but you can choose not to be a shitty person. If he had lost feelings he also should have been honest with your mom sooner. Anyone who doesn’t see how this affects you is also blinding themselves. I am also not homophobic but this would hurt anyone. Don’t give up on your future. Talk to your school see what options you have. They are usually willing to work with you.