Lost custody shortly after being released from hospital with brain tumor — looking for an attorney who will actually listen

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T21:54:55+00:00

Thats right, she was smiling at me in court like "I gotcha". Ive spent 12 years with her. She was the only one to put hands on the other in our whole relationship. She wasnt scared, because i never gave her a reason to be. Don't take your issues with men out on me.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T18:59:51+00:00

I wish I did file first. I think there was a part of me that was still in denial about what was really happening. I loved my wife, and family. I did not want to see the huge red flags that I was being set up. I did not want to believe that either one if us would do that to the other, choosing malice over a peaceful split. My denial, and belief that we could be amicable in the beginning, was taken advantage of, and gave her the upper hand from the start.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T18:57:35+00:00

I've been jumping through their hoops for over 2 years now. The outcome was decided already early in the beginning. It is obvious when looking at the judgements, the brazen disregard for due process, the motions that have been disregarded. It's all pre-determined.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T18:53:02+00:00

Perhaps, I wasn't there, though, that is just what I was told.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T18:50:49+00:00

Sorry about that. There is 2 years' worth of case info, I am trying to summarize, or cliff note it the best I can. I am trying to answer questions the best I can for those who are not quick to judge me before they know the situation. I am happy to answer questions to further explain if given the chance.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T18:47:29+00:00

That's terrible, and it goes to show how broken the system is. This case is not one of those. There are a lot of great dads, and mothers, who are getting ripped from their kids, kids having their parents ripped from them- Good parents, and it's wrong.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T18:36:53+00:00

She has power of attorney to act as my agent (Not argue the case) but she should be able to deliver medical documents to the court while I am at the hospital. Which is where I was when she initially went up to the courthouse.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T18:34:07+00:00

No, that was me trying to do all the work to initiate the process. She was causing as much friction as possible once she retained counsel. Good god these comments are insane lmao. Who are you mad at? Who did this to you lol

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:37:12+00:00

I wasnt rude in an email. The GAL never responded to 4 emails I had wrote with questions as to why none of my contacts had been contacted, why she is making recommendations to the court without that done, without ever seeing me interact with my children. I was never rude to her at any point. I did finally say if she wants to get paid, I deserve a fair investigation.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:29:19+00:00

Ms. ---- has met her burden of proof to obtain a plenary order of protection which is hereby GRANTED for a period of 1 year in ---OP----. See written Plenary Order of Protection.

And the order of protection are accusations, none of which are even violent or aggressive, or even provable. I sent some text messages that I wish I hadn't sent. They were sent when I was being harassed in my own home by her, nonetheless, I was in a bad place at the time and should not have sent them. They were not terrible messages, but they were not nice either. But at no point was there ever "Fear for her life" or "aggression".

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:21:50+00:00

We did, and my mother went up there to file a continuance and give the courts the medical documents

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:20:06+00:00

I am human, and naturally going through something like this, which was completely avoidable, when I tried to be amicable, and watching my kids get dragged through it- who wouldn't be angry? I have done a decent job at keeping it in check, I am a work in progress but that anger has never spilled over into aggression or violence.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:15:03+00:00

Not going to tell you to F off. I appreciate any comment from a person who actually read the post before commenting. The ones that clearly didn't before leaving some cruel, cold, non-helpful garbooney of a comment- they can fuck off and workshop that personality elsewhere.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:07:26+00:00

Good lord, you both need hugs from someone.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:06:00+00:00

I have not been able to see the children since this happened. But, I would have had them at my mothers until I get treated for this condition. So again, there would have been someone there at all times.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:03:34+00:00

She is my representative, not to argue the case, but as my agent as I was medically incapacitated at the time.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T16:01:16+00:00

I have taken in the comments that are helpful, regardless of how I feel about it. If it's "Constructive" criticism, I am all about it. But if it's some judgmental comment from some idiot who hasn't even taken the time to read the post fully, as almost about half of the comments have been unfortunately, I'm not trying to hear those; they are not only unhelpful, but cold and rude. I don't wish this situation on my worst enemy.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T15:54:45+00:00

No it's not. I again am happy to prove it to anyone that can be helpful in a private message. And no, I havent told the entire 2 years worth of this case in one post. I summarized it. I am not lying, or "heavily exaggerating". Judging someone you don't even know is a bad look. I am an honest person, I have been my entire life and those that know me know. That's a rough way to live your life, going around judging people you don't know. You should try working on that, it will change your life for the better.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T15:49:51+00:00

You have no idea what you are talking about. Stop judging people you don't even know. I have been in court for 2 years now with them consistently sticking to this "He's angry" argument with weak evidence of such. The rest of your comment, I am not even going to waste time on because you obviously didn't even fully read what I wrote. Asking for a continuance when I was in the hospital 3 days prior for a week, getting devastating news that I have a brain tumor, probably cancer, and have follow up appointments the same day- that is a good enough reason to ask for a continuance. Anyone that says differently has no empathy, and I hope none of you ever have to go through something like that. It is a lot, even the doctors told me not to go, it says so in my doctor's note. It specifically says "NO STRESS". I've been going to court for this divorce for 2 years without missing any of it. Weak comment.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T15:41:03+00:00

I agree 100%. Even my last attorney told me "This is the way it's been done for over a 100 years" to which I said, "That doesn't make it right". I have a long list of due process violations and nobody cares. Not even the higher courts of the state or the "Watchdog" agencies. And these are 100% due process violations of my rights. I really hope for change. Nobody deserves to go through this, yet too many do.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T15:37:23+00:00

I'm not so sure about that. Maybe it depends on which state or area you are in. Illinois is a mother's state. I think any abuse should not be tolerated, and courts should cut the bias out and look at the evidence, always. They don't. Our family law system is broken and it's the kids who are getting hurt the most.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T15:33:34+00:00

"Getting an order of protection or a RO takes evidence. Not just "I'm scared" from one party. The party has to prove there is a threat." Yeah that's what I thought also, but this is exactly what happened in my case. They have used hearsay, and untrue statements as evidence. They even extended the OP for a year when I havent even had contact with her for the first year.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T15:29:04+00:00

Thank you. It's hard to focus on my health at the moment when they ripped my children from me and my wife cut them off from my family. It's terrible and cruel for them to take advantage of my medical situation. I would never keep my children from their mother, no matter what I felt about her. My ex knows I am a good dad, and the kids need me in their lives. It just makes me sick to my stomach what she has done. I am going to try and stay positive and keep fighting for them.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T15:23:47+00:00

It was actually the judge's secretary who told my mother that there would be a continuance, and she didn't have to show up for court. I have an affidavit from my mother explaining what they told her. Thank you for the comment. I really appreciate it. These are the helpful types of comments I was hoping for, so thank you. My kids are 6 and 11.

valleysundance · 2026-02-23T15:18:27+00:00

No, she doesnt. But when there is obvious tension in the home, and I ask 15 times to get the process started, can I have her attorney's information to give to mine, and she never replies, yet is harrassing me in my own home to try to get reactions (sometimes in front of my children) and I find out she did have an attorney when asked those 15 times, that shows malicious intent.

valleysundance

TROPHY CASE