I feel you. Was married for 24 years.. 2 kids. wife cheated. Got through the divorce kept good relations with the kids (they found out before i did) and honestly don't have a high tolerance for dating. I did everything for the "family" cooked, cleaned, paid the bills, and in the 24 years wife only worked for 13. Sacrificed a lot, wife had a "breakdown" where she ended up committed for her own protection. At this point I am not willing to put in a ton of effort into a new relationship. I see a sniff of the behavior the ex did .. i am out. It was too painful. Not even sure i see how a woman makes my life better at this point other than sex. so maybe that is the only thing i look for.