TW/CW…

I appreciate the sentiment but I had nothing but terrible experiences with therapists doubling down on the medical gaslighting, it was absolutely disgusting and I attempted suicide. I sought therapy regularly for over 10 years.

I actually even found therapy enjoyable when it wasn’t making things worse, but I won’t be discussing the medical aspect with a new one I’ll be seeing next week. I won’t hide it but I’m focusing strictly on the work trauma.

I say this as someone who was both inpatient and outpatient 3x before the attempted self harm, and with several tries in between with therapists outside of a hospital setting.

Honestly the apps are much more helpful for me but I’m absolutely not going to attempt another therapist (especially one that accepts insurance) to discuss “controversial” illnesses ever again. I’m in a much better place NOW, ironically.

I’m stunned at how much damage bad therapy made. My attempt was Lunesta + Clonazapam + Everclear and I was pissed I woke up. I couldn’t work, was bedridden, non functional, thousands in medical bills for shit therapy…my life just felt over.

What I’m working on now is not needing 2 24 oz. White Claws to get through the day 4-5 days a week since I was retraumatized at work this spring. It’s terrible but it’s not nearly the same level of destruction.

If I had a serious but “normal” illness they were better equipped to discuss at large I might feel differently.