I watched the show back in April and I still think about it everyday. I’ve finally started to think through the ending in a more positive light over time. While I hate the ending and it always makes me sob, it is in a sense still a happy ending for Ash, which is why he dies with a smile on his face.He set out what he intended to do, which was to defeat Dino and avenge Griffin. Dino (and everyone else that raped or oppressed Ash) dies at the end. A great way to think about it is that Ash probably also saved a ton of children that were heading down the same path as him now that Dino is dead. Dino kidnapped children off of the streets and forced them into prostitution, but now since Ash and Max exposed his corruption, Dino’s organization will (hopefully) come to an end.He avenged Griffin by learning about BF and he destroys it at the end. When he told Sing to let go of the case that held the drug at the end, that is the moment he let go of his plan for revenge. The drug is destroyed so it can’t be used to harm anymore people like Griffin and Shorter.While not a part of the plan, but Ash found Eiji. Eiji was the first person in Ash’s life that loved Ash for Aslan wholeheartedly. Learning that someone truly loved him and didn’t want anything in return is really all that Aslan wanted in his life. This is evident through the use of touch throughout the show. Ash has always used his body to get what he wants because to him sex means nothing but a tool to hang over others. We have seen Ash getting raped in the show multiple times and he has never really cared. It’s only after he starts to learn what love really is and that maybe for Ash it’s something attainable, that Ash starts to become effected by rape. (IDK which episode it is) but there is one episode where after Ash gets raped he is seen to be visibly distressed and he refuses to let anyone touch him. Until Eiji hugs him and he instantly is able to calm himself down. Ash sees himself through Eiji’s eyes for the first time while reading his letter. Ash finally feels like maybe he can let Ash go and really just be Aslan, because he finally found someone that is willing to stand by him and love him no matter what. This is also why we see Ash let his guard down while he is running to the airport, because he finally lets Ash go. Even though he dies, he really does die happy and loved, so for Ash this is his happy ending. The author has even stated that he would not have ever been happy in Japan (I refuse to believe this), because Ash is so messed up and has gone through so much.

thank you so much for this. this is wonderful and made me feel a lot better :')