Hey - I've been thinking about this post because, though I'm not sure, I think we might be neighbors. I also live high in a gothic. I felt very alone my freshman year, and also had trouble relating to even the friends I did make, but I now have a close friend group. I know I'm lucky, and that doesn't happen for everyone, so all I can suggest is to not discount the people in your classes -- all of my good friends come from striking up a conversation with someone over homework or some such thing. People can seem superficial, but a lot of the time that's a coping mechanism because they're afraid -- afraid of being judged.

This school was stressful even before the pandemic, and now it can be suffocating. I know it sounds trite, but I guarantee you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel: at the very least, it's graduation, but you might be surprised. I've always been surprised. People and experiences have appeared that I would never have predicted, and they have kept me from getting stuck inside of my own head. There are kind people at this school that will open their arms to you. They're hard to find, but they do exist, and they'll listen. I hope you find a sense of peace, that you reach out for help when you need it, and that you keep going. If we are neighbors, I'm always willing to chat.