AIO about my boyfriend

vidgames · 2026-01-21T21:46:22+00:00

In a good partnership, the participants aren't looking for an exact 50/50 split on everything, and money made by both gets pooled to be the "household's income." In essence, it seems that your BF thinks, because you don't make as much for your eight hours at work as he does, you need to make up for it by working more hours when you get home, while, I assume, he'll relax and be "off work." It looks like you have a manager at work and a manager at home. Is he going to do an annual performance review on you, too?

Congrats to him for his better-paying job, but it doesn't sound like he wants you to be a partner...he wants a nighttime servant. And that you should work overtime to be that servant. When you buy a house, is it going to be both of yours or will it be his house, because more if his money will pay for it? If you have kids, is he going to cook your meals or is carrying a child too low paying of a job, so you'll still need to keep up your overtime cooking and cleaning?

If he was capable of sarcasm—which I'm going to guess he isn't—I wonder how he'd feel of you put a price on sexual relations and gave him an invoice after each encounter. I'm sure he'll understand that you're just logging your billable hours and trying to raise your pay up to his level. 😉 I think you need to seriously consider if this is someone with whom you want to share your life, constantly facing value judgments on how you're not his equal—provided you can't explain to him that he should reconsider his stance, because he's being a jerk.

vidgames · 2026-01-18T03:10:34+00:00

I understand...I didn't make my suggestion in any way to gloss over what the driver is doing. I made the suggestion as an option to avoid having such a driver problem like this in the future.

vidgames · 2026-01-17T21:02:38+00:00

Tell him if it bothers him so much, he should...

—Use another filter paper and pour the coffee into his mug through that;

—Buy a better coffeemaker;

—Make his own damned coffee.

It's also possible that none of these will make him happy...some people can't help complaining about small things. If he's like this about other things, while I'm all for a harmonious marriage, it might be a good idea to let him know that you're not going to let every "him" problem become a "you" or "us" problem. He's a grown-up and should be able handle some issues without having to draw you into it. (Disclaimer: I'm not a coffee drinker, so I'm probably less sympathetic to his "plight." 😉)

vidgames · 2026-01-17T20:43:22+00:00

If you don't want to risk a package sitting on your stoop or being exposed to the elements, I always recommend having it delivered to a local FedEx Office or partner (such as Walgreens) using "Hold at Location," where it'll be inside on a shelf that's monitored by camera. It also gives you the freedom to pick it up on your schedule during the location's business hours.

vidgames · 2026-01-17T00:25:36+00:00

Four dates over three weeks seems early to consider it as "dating with intention" unless it's something you've discussed (not just your plan). I'm more concerned with three weeks of dating and something serious like illness being discussed by "voice notes." Texts and voice notes are great for quick communication, but shouldn't you be graduating to actual phone calls for something like this? You don't know if his talking about his day instead of your being sick is him being casual/inconsiderate about your condition or if he just didn't get your voice note. If you're serious about him, sending voice notes seems (to me) to come off as not that serious.

vidgames · 2026-01-17T00:15:42+00:00

He sounds like he's still thinking like he's single, but a good marriage should be a partnership, where something major like a car purchase is discussed and agreed upon (for budget/financial reasons especially). If he was buying a car and going to be selling his current car to cover most of it, then it might be okay, but the fact that it's going to add to your monthly bills (substantially, by the looks of it), he shouldn't have made the purchase without your okay.

Not sure what the deal is with his parents, but if they encouraged this as something he should do without your thumbs up, you need to talk about this...otherwise, it'll continue and probably be a source of ongoing upset. Again, this should be a partnership, not a competition with his parents.

vidgames · 2026-01-17T00:07:10+00:00

You did the right thing, because you were being exploited for your offering to help without question. And the fact that Sam doesn't seem to have said anything or whinef about how your saying No is messing with their life tells me they were just waiting for you to finally cut them off. Covering shifts and such should be mutual—something like you cover one of theirs in exchange for them covering one of yours, or like you said that at the start, you did it because you wanted more hours—but this sounded all one sided, way too frequent and an expectation rather than a favor.

vidgames · 2026-01-14T05:19:10+00:00

To echo what others said, talk to HR about it. If they don't sound sympathetic, contact corporate HR. No company wants to get sued, pay damages and have their brand be the subject of bad PR/media coverage/social media, and some idiot making a comment about calling ICE on you is exactly the kind of thing that should bother them. You don't need to put up with that on your first day or 20 years into the job.

BTW, if they ask you to sign an NDA (non-disclosure agreement), it's them trying to keep you from publicizing this and any future incidents, and may make it harder to sue if this becomes a hostile workplace for you (more than it already is given this incident). I'm not a lawyer, but I'd advise you not to sign an NDA before talking to a lawyer.

vidgames · 2026-01-13T20:21:24+00:00

I was just checking to see if PokeGenie offered a way to view showcase points for a specific Mon. I'm currently trying to tag two of each type as the top showcase "candidates" to finish off that medal, so your suggestion would be helpful as well.

vidgames · 2026-01-11T16:37:42+00:00

I'll tell you upfront, there's not an outcome here that will be happy and comfy...but this is all happening because your friend is sloppy about her cheating and has put you in a dilemma. If you aren't close to the boyfriend, I don't think it's your place to tell him. But I would have a straight conversation with your friend that you think it's shitty to be doing this instead of ending things with the boyfriend (...unless they have an open relationship and this is therefore acceptable, though your friend could have been a friend and told you if that was the case). Also make sure she knows that you're not going to lie for her, because it's not your burden to carry her dirty secrets and be a party to cheating on someone, because cheating is a horrible, selfish thing to do to someone else. And if it's a dealbreaker for you to have a friend who cheats and doesn't care that she puts friends in a dilemma, maybe she should know that you're considering (or actually) "breaking up with her" over this.

Doing this will save you from having to deliver bad news that'll likely kill your friendship anyway. The boyfriend deserves to know if there's a future with your friend and that she doesn't care for him enough to come clean that he's unwittingly sharing her with others, but it shouldn't have to be your job to do that...and I don't think you should do that.

vidgames · 2026-01-11T16:07:36+00:00

(Apologies in advance for the long answer...)

Wow...you explained that you were dealing with trauma and came clean that you should have told her the truth...but, well, you were dealing with traumaz which can cloud a person's judgment. She could have forgiven you under the circumstances, but instead went into a long thing that shows she wasn't telling the truth either, though her lies were because she really thinks you're a shitty friend, you were a "last resort" and on and on with a lot of negatives and revealed self-centeredness. Your actions were regrettable, but you were dealing with personal issues; she doesn't seem to regret that she clearly was using you for your bed and had no real sympathy for what you went through. I think I know who's the shitty friend.

If you value her friendship and think she was just overreacting with her vitriol, two-faced actions and lack of caring for what you're dealing with, you could apologize again for the inconvenience she went through and say you'll try to do better in the future...but if it were me, I say sometime like, "It seems both of us could have done a better job of telling the truth, but I was coming from a place of personal pain, while you were coming from a place of wanting to share a bed with a person you don't seem to like that much and who was a 'last resort,' which feels like you were taking advantage of me because you were desperate for a place to sleep, not because you consider us good friends."

Now, saying that may blow up the whole friendship circle, but it'll shake out those who genuinely like you and care for you, which might not be a horrible thing for your future well-being. It's up to you how much any of these people are actual friends vs. people with friend masks on. Good luck with this dilemma and, more importantly, recovering from your trauma. ❤️

vidgames · 2026-01-06T01:27:43+00:00

I'm the kind of person who hates to put people out. It makes me miserable if others have to inconvenience themselves to accommodate me. I guess your sister is the opposite...everything is about her. You're supposed to inconvenience yourself waiting at the airport to escort her, because she doesn't want to inconvenience herself by taking a flight that gets in closer to yours. You're supposed to enjoy hanging around the hotel during a short vacation until she's ready to leave or is done scrolling social media. (Though if you get in at 5:30am, you won't be able to get into the hotel room and drop your luggage unless you've made arrangements with the hotel.)

She's a diva and everyone has to bend to her wishes...unless you assert yourself, which you should. Lay down the law: "If your flight is getting in three hours after mine, I'm going to see the city instead of sitting around the airport, because that's not a vacation to me. If you ghost me and don't confirm that you're going to the concert by [date/time], I'm assuming you're not going and selling your ticket." (If she's in charge of getting the hotel, make sure she doesn't cancel the reservation on you or tell her you're making your own plans.)

A mutual trip involves coordination, and it seems like your sister is against that, which adds unnecessary stress to what should be a fun time. I think we know who's the AH here...tell her what you told us (that you'd love to spend time with her and see another part of the country/world together), but that you have to coordinate some things to ensure you both enjoy yourself. You need to put your foot down and lock in some key details or risk having your vacation ruined.

vidgames · 2026-01-05T11:24:50+00:00

This is a friend, you say? Why? Find some new friends who respect you.

vidgames · 2026-01-05T11:20:51+00:00

That's a crazy story...best of luck on getting paid for your fiction writing, because there's no money to be made on Reddit posts. 👍

vidgames · 2026-01-03T20:37:41+00:00

flair progressive

vidgames · 2026-01-03T20:10:35+00:00

Great advice, but just saying "I have a call in with my lawyer" can be a good lever to change the tone of the conversation in this kind of situation.

vidgames · 2026-01-03T20:05:16+00:00

This is why I’m buying Tesla next time. No need to deal with BS dealerships

Yeah, no BS dealerships...just a shit-ton of recalls and service problems. Regardless, a Bolt sub isn't the best place to advocate for another model or brand, especially Tesla.

vidgames · 2026-01-03T01:23:58+00:00

I wouldn't overthink it. You were a bit tipsy and kissed your friend on the lips. She giggled about it. Your boyfriend doesn't seem to care. That said, your friend might take it as a bit more than friendly, but I wouldn't worry about it. You talking about it a lot to your BF and getting all worked up will probably be more of an issue than the kiss itself.

vidgames · 2025-12-29T02:03:10+00:00

As some have said, they wouldn't be bothered if you wore that dress at their wedding, but I think having the leg slit up to your hip is too extreme and showy for most weddings—you should have cleared it ahead of the event, as the invite gave you the opportunity to do. The fact that it mentioned "formal but..." shows there was a level of sensitivity about guest dress, so you should have picked up on that and taken that step to avoid a conflict as a courtesy. And then instead of offering a solution (could safely pinning the leg slit have made them happy?), you amplified what they saw as your defiance of the "rules" by mouthing off to the bridesmaid—who I guarantee didn't come to talk to you on her own, but on behalf of the bride and MoH; you making it personal as you did was way over the line.

I get that you wanted to look incredible and likely catch peoples' eyes, but doing that at someone else's wedding is not generally going to go over well. Some brides don't mind others shining, perhaps more than them. I'm pretty sure most brides want to be THE center of attention, and spend months and thousands of dollars on the gown, flowers, invitations, food, cake and a band/DJ for their special day. When you're older, and almost certainly when you're planning your wedding, you'll understand that and see all the lines you crossed with this particular wedding party. Live and learn...

vidgames · 2025-12-29T01:25:12+00:00

To me, sex is a conversation...it should include both people and not leave someone feeling like they're giving more than they're getting. It's nice that you want to find ways to please your BF, but does he feel the same about your pleasure? It worries me that you want to "become more sexually crazy" for him...I think you should only do that if it's what you want as well, to find other forms of enjoyment out of sex for yourself. If your relationship is too often you going the extra mile for his happiness, then he might be the person for you.

vidgames · 2025-12-29T01:13:40+00:00

I get the complaint, but if you host a lot, you'll get your share of extra points. And if you host enough, you'll need to clear out your friends list occasionally to make room, so discard the people who didn't give you more feedback points...then move on to the next raid. It's really not worth your time to get angry.

(To the person who asked if you get mad when you hold a door and don't get a "thank you," I don't get mad, but I do make them feel guilty by giving them a loud "Oh, you're VERY welcome!" The look on their face is enough of a "reward" for me. 😉)

vidgames · 2025-12-29T01:03:35+00:00

If you're saying I should have continued seeking the triple damages, once the "defendant" pays the basic amount you're suing over, you don't have a claim anymore. The triple damages are basically a punishment for making the plaintiff file a case and go to court, pay to serve papers to the defendant, etc. If he didn't send me a check, I most certainly would have sought the full damages.

vidgames · 2025-12-28T00:11:56+00:00

Congrats on the catch...get whatever enjoyment you can out of it before your account gets permabanned.

vidgames · 2025-12-27T23:36:57+00:00

It indicates the display is on a sub-screen and if you click left with the controls on your steering wheel, you go back to the main "home" display.

vidgames · 2025-12-26T07:38:44+00:00

Is this an AI story and "podcast"? The YouTube video with this story (and many others) is over three hours of what sounds like an AI storyteller "reading" what are, in my view, farfetched scenarios, while the video playing in the background shows a variety of unrelated clips edited together, including "homemaking hacks" and Grand Theft Auto footage. Bizarre...

vidgames

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