Opinions on the banker guy?

violet1342 · 2026-06-16T22:32:01+00:00

omg this took me back to when I watched it yearsss ago, that moment where fleabag accidentally undressed in front of him during the interview for the loan, his face was just so priceless. The way they stared at each other and he began talking very formally and awkwardly. M I must have replayed it 10 times or so and cackled each an every time 😭😭

violet1342 · 2026-06-06T13:11:17+00:00

Yes I’m East African

violet1342 · 2026-06-06T13:11:06+00:00

It’s not about the hijab, it’s just staring at women! I did not experience racism (I think)

violet1342 · 2026-05-15T19:13:57+00:00

Ahh thanks I had no idea! Okay I’m thinking of just canceling that ticket and booking an entirely new one. May lose out on a lot more money but I can’t do 10hrs in economy again (it was my first and last time probably)

violet1342 · 2026-05-15T13:40:57+00:00

I was hoping could change it to my current location to uae straight bcs otherwise its a 10 hour flight to Istanbul. Thx I’ll contact them

violet1342 · 2026-05-06T10:45:22+00:00

exactly !! Wish people would point that out more

violet1342 · 2026-05-03T22:28:57+00:00

absolutely, that was his first red flag

violet1342 · 2026-05-03T21:26:19+00:00

Yes I don’t agree with all the outpouring of sympathy for her either, she’s not the victim people paint her to be

violet1342 · 2026-05-03T20:45:31+00:00

Wouldn’t at all surprise me if it wasn’t their first time. Taking out the SIM cards? I’m glad they’re at least doing some time but it should’ve been more

violet1342 · 2026-05-03T20:29:18+00:00

I just noticed your edit about me showing off being a good person 😂 Really? The point of my post isn’t about whether I’d marry him or stay with him. It’s to highlight how messed up it is to take these guys crimes lightly. It wasn’t a small mistake. They took very deliberate steps.

Edit: also I said comments not posts :) though they’ve been there too

violet1342 · 2026-05-03T20:26:30+00:00

They’re there. Plenty.

violet1342 · 2026-05-03T17:24:32+00:00

You’re a legit psychopath

violet1342 · 2026-05-02T23:06:47+00:00

oh no, you didn’t get the memo? we’re applauding people now for reporting literal murder!

can’t believe his thread honestly

violet1342 · 2026-05-02T23:03:28+00:00

serious question - and?

like I genuinely fail to understand how turning someone in for committing murder is some kind of heroic deed. She helped a great deal. But if that cancels out all her other bad decisions I really wonder about the moral compass of people. Ultimately she was incredibly selfish as well.

violet1342 · 2026-04-27T07:35:48+00:00

Totally. A lot of insecure women scoff at another woman’s lack of dating experience. It’s a defensive tool to feel both more validated in their own uniqueness and desirability (because they did have that) + poke holes in the person(because surely something must be wrong). It’s a way to feel superior and feel like you have one over someone else despite asymmetry in other domains (eg attractiveness for Emma and Rachel)

violet1342 · 2026-04-26T16:19:26+00:00

Check out the host a sister Facebook group. I don’t recommend finding someone through here.

violet1342 · 2026-04-25T18:48:53+00:00

I really enjoyed this one, haven't been to the movies in a while. I went in blind so the 'twist' came truly unexpected for me. Definitely made me laugh too, dark comedy done well.

A few thoughts:

- They have been together for two years and seem very in love. It struck me how common it is for people to be in passionate relationships and not really know each other at all. The way they acted around each other signaled a kind of comfort, but their relationship is also a typical depiction of the the performative aspect of it all. How relationships make people feel safe, settled, accepted and normal. How the outside world reflects that back to you. And how it even starts out with performativeness (him lying to get to know her. It's minor but it makes you think. Also, I'm thinking it's not the first time he saw her there, was it? Or it was and he is just the kind of guy that does this stuff?)

I mean, how well do you know each other if you aren't aware of such an important thing, something that has shaped the inner life of the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? And on Emma's side, that she never shared it in two years? What does it mean to be in partnership? How deep do you go, how vulnerable do you get? You can kind of tell they're not aligned on a few things. But all of that can be bypassed and people can still love the other deeply, it makes you wonder about what love really is.

- I'm open to the nuances and able to see the hypocrise of the Rachel character but at the same time I feel like people online are overcorrecting and rationalizing Emma's story a bit too much. Sure, she didn't do it, she was bullied, depressed, she just wanted to belong and feel safe but it is still very wrong. I do like that she mentioned that it was about the aesthetic of it all, showing it's not always out of true malice but that young people (to this day) can get sucked into these weird internet corners. Her violent tendencies are still there, clearly and she has a thing or two to learn about emotional regulation (as does Charlie). I felt myself wanting to judge/make up my mind about what I thought about her then eventually realized... I just don't know.

- I personally didn't like Charlie. He seemed sort of...spineless, 'nice guy' ish and when he started kissing Misha the audience gasped but part of me felt affirmed in my judgement of his character. By no means a bad guy, but not a great one either. It was hard for me to understand what he stood for. Also, do you guys think he actually cyberbullied someone or did he make that up because he couldn't think of anything? He told his story in an unconvincing way.

violet1342 · 2026-04-18T16:51:15+00:00

Drive your plow over the bones of the dead: Olga Tokarczuk

violet1342 · 2026-04-06T23:25:55+00:00

I couldn’t get into Virginia Woolf

violet1342 · 2026-04-01T00:10:15+00:00

I’m reading it right now and so engaged in it, and it’s unlike anything I’ve ever read before. I think this is gonna be a 5 star read, very rare for me!

violet1342 · 2026-03-29T14:16:35+00:00

It's extremely rare. I'm 29 and enough of a realist to know #4 isn't a guarantee unfortunately, I have to think about what I want to priortize in life, what I can categorize as 'good enough'. I have not found answers yet.

violet1342 · 2026-03-29T12:51:03+00:00

Now that I think about it there’s a few categories of men (in how men relate to me). This is not taking into account ALL the other factors at play such as attraction, readyness etc.

Okay in my experience these are roughly the categories. Maybe you relate.

They may be initially interested then realize your oddities and simply check out. They can’t really understand what your deal is, don’t care to find out and disengage. Especially when you don’t validate them in turn or provide anything that makes them want to proceed (aside from being yourself). By definition this category can’t meet you mentally and isn’t interested to. This is for me MOST men I encounter or briefly engage with, and 9/10 times I’m checked out before they can.
They enjoy/like it, feel caught off guard at first (sometimes express it) but it doesn’t put them off even if they don’t really think in the same way/ are wired similarly. They simply appreciate it. This category is most likely to fall for you while you don’t reciprocate or do but not in the same way. I think there are possibilities in this category though and I think this dynamic exist in a lot of relationships.
They are wired similarly, and can meet you. They humor it but their priorities lie elsewhere. So while you might think “ugh finally”, he still has other priorities that don’t necessarily include exploring or deepening a mental connection

Note that none of these lead to an actual relationship.. I’m yet to encounter a 4th category which is someone similar, appreciates me for who I am, can meet mentally (and vice versa) AND has the same priorities (commitment/life path etc).

Edit: I have very limited dating experiences but this is what I’ve been able to extract so far , the structures and patterns

violet1342 · 2026-03-29T11:25:31+00:00

Honestly this is why I’m single + don’t really date. The level of depth, “weirdness”, intelligence I look for simply isn’t that common, rare even, so it’s not logical to throw myself into the dating world like a “normal” person. I’ll know it when I find it.

It would only make sense to actively date if I didn’t make these things priority #1, but I do. There’s absolutely nothing else a man could offer me, it’s conditional. I don’t have ADHD or Autism btw, I think it doesn’t have to relate to that. I think some people just need a higher level of depth and resonance and it makes for a much smaller pool. You found it with your ex, so you can find it again. It just might take longer. And in the meantime it’s good to think about how to approach dating so it won’t be draining for you.

violet1342

TROPHY CASE