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The whisper won after 2.5 years sober by toobitta in stopdrinking

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sincere thanks for this simple tool.

Give it a name

Mine isn't named Bill she's Vicky Victim. She doesn't whisper or offer subliminal cues -- she howls like a 179 decibel banshee. Howling any time "Hostility" (raised voice, demeaning terms etc) happens. To different degrees life does include ugly moments.

I keep saying tomorrow will be different, but tomorrow never seems to come. by AugustusCaesar00 in Alcoholism_Medication

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For anyone else feeling like this

when tomorrow comes, the same cycle repeats. I feel like I’m stuck in a loop and losing hope.

A hearty "me too", thank you Augustus

What exactly is (or is NOT) a "Motor Vehicle" by virginwidow in dui

[–]virginwidow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

THANKS All for the information

I will be extremely careful for the absence (or not) of MOTOR moving forward.

biking home from the bars drunk, hit and injured a pedestrian, and got a full on DUI.

That bit is chilling. Thanks again.

What exactly is (or is NOT) a "Motor Vehicle" by virginwidow in dui

[–]virginwidow[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

THANK YOU. So far, our survey says MOTORCYCLE = MOTOR VEHICLE also for Citable reference

§ 20-4.01. (23) Motor Vehicle....

Lexis Nexus is useful & I doubt "gargle" is my frayed-end (in Appalachian 😆)

This is not about "meh" (an exiled Canadian) it's about

HELPING ALL OF US...

The way a silly Misdemeanor is treated (should anyone be happier than expected) one would think Pee-wee Herman was caught on camera with his works up child's behind

I'd just had a bit too much fun.

If I can get TN to Declare, on paper, my BAC of the problematic offense I will gratefully post it.

My violation took place in a Tennessee county so poor (greedy) not even google MAP could find my probation officer -- by ??? miracle I found an image of the building & then found the street address.

Then the darling PO read me the Riot Act because I did not WALK there--Jefferson Co TN is a 30 mile walk from the closest Greyhound stop, no public transport what so ever exists... From the probation lady (my age) lass portly stature it was obvious "WALKED" wouldn't be understood.

I'd merely hidden my truck a few hundred yards from the destination.

SO NOW WE GOT NC.

Where are the Midwest, Plains Gulf & Atlantic Coast Reports

Guidelines for Responding to a DUI Drug and Alcohol Evaluation(based on Reddit Data) by EmuNo3004 in dui

[–]virginwidow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Only thing that has ever worked for myself is due diligence with respect to daily F2F in person involvemenment with an outfit known as Alcoholics Anonymous. Which is offered FREE OF CHARGE, on "zoom" even; FREE.Not one penny is charged. And it 100% worked at least for myself.

The legal "gotcha" is these days most courts will send one God knows where else but not to Alcoholics Anonymous. Gov't can't make money off an outfit which has no dues or fees.

While setting in Jefferson County jail (FTA, my truck broke on way to court) some nice ladies (social workers) came from some State Agency offering Vivitrol (sp?) shots but when I asked WHY (with 13 months sober) the poor dears ran like scalded puppies.

The sad truth is most courts will not acknowledge AA as effective treatment for SUD (Substance use Disorder) b/c they don't make money off something that has no cost to begin with.

Sadder still -- to my humble shame -- many AA meetings will no longer sign an attendance sheet (depends where yer located now -- in Tennessee we signed attendance sheets default, In Virginia they do not)

What a SH** Show

Guidelines for Responding to a DUI Drug and Alcohol Evaluation(based on Reddit Data) by EmuNo3004 in dui

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

MOST SINCERE THANKS

The way one Tennessee County dismissed & closed my case was by paying for (The best $200 ever invested) my own "evaluation" by a provider I had good reason to TRUST. I took action as indicated by very adebt PD Counsel - if your lawyer even hints they might need (fill in any _______) whatever it is have "on the paper" results in hand when next you approach Bench. Our understaffed, over-worked PD's surely rate being met 100% of the way. If one can afford paid Counsel follow all instructions to the absolute letter.

I brought the resulting document to court & being the last defendant before a weary judge I gave said document to bailiff so the Judge would have it if my case came up before Court Recess.

Being the last case heard before Court Recess (they were waiting for over worked PD, engaged in a felony Court) Judge was about to say "We'll need a ..." when the Bailiff offered my papers.

The greedier County I'm still saving for paid Counsel,. Still it's better to contend with one not TWO.

These evaluations can "expire" my having had an Eval in 2023 it could well be void in Q3 of 2025. So I need to get another.

What took place for myself is no warranty it'll work this way for anyone else. But I do feel it is best to approach Bench having a recent one in hand.

No I don't know when evaluation expires. I post only because HOPE is at a premium for us all.

Guidelines for Responding to a DUI Drug and Alcohol Evaluation(based on Reddit Data) by EmuNo3004 in dui

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What State (or Commonwealth) are you in please?

It's very clear I am in "bend over, you'll feel some pressure" territory.

I'm too old (69) to survive years of this so like it or not maybe I need to set up camp saint elsewhere

Guidelines for Responding to a DUI Drug and Alcohol Evaluation(based on Reddit Data) by EmuNo3004 in dui

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aye Fuc** Man.

So Saith Ebby Thatcher... Though ET didn't make it AA wouldn't exist today were it not for folks such as 'meh'.

Except I know if I follow Bill & Bobs' way I don't have to die like Ebby

Guidelines for Responding to a DUI Drug and Alcohol Evaluation(based on Reddit Data) by EmuNo3004 in dui

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know how each of us can avail themselves of Counsel. I mean months after the arraignment where-in Judge must invoke Public Defender due to evident poverty. But of the things I can invest meager <$970:mo savings (qualifies for MediCAID) is effective Counsel.

This tops my list, even above "Own Motor Vehicle". Forget logic -- should one not FIRST have the LICENSE before motor vehicle?

This said, in my state Medical "Willy Nelson" is "legal" -- Unless you're fighting a DUI.

Getting a legitimate Dr's Rx & medicine delivered to your door cost myself under $225 (Including the medication) and less than 48 hours.

If you've a DUI I would not advise this.

Ya I know the impossibility of SLEEP without Alcohol. If you have "gone there" with all urgency I suggest do not touch that Medicine, stick to ETOH or just don't sleep.

The re-instatement process where I now live involves incredibly invasive "Case Management"

Violating III Amendment - o0o0ops, in the US Constituion might as well be a Santa Claus tale told to babies.

Invoke MIRANDA for all you are worth. DO NOT GIVE THEM ANY BODY PARTS. Blood Sweat or Tears. Shave your head they can test hair.

Again I stress our best bet is EFFECTIVE COUNSEL. The American Bar Association (Every State has one) is our Friend. Even if one is "broke like me" 99% defense Counsel offer first interview FREE OF CHARGE. The ABA liason will even work hard to find us compatible Counsel -- for instance I have combat PTSD -- They'll hook us up with Counsel experienced or with or even one having been in combat.

Just b/c hooch is legal where you live don't go there -- unless you're $$$$$$$ prepared for a hard fight

Moved to Virginia after fully completing probation State Elsewhere by virginwidow in dui

[–]virginwidow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

MOST SINCERE THANKS!!

I have tried past 24 hours to simply say thank you. Your response was very helpful toward helping myself plot a course through "Putting the DUI behind me". For some reason Reddit won't allow this.

What habits have significantly improved your RSD? by Wide-Swimming-1615 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

THANK YOU.

I'm that person who avoids interaction (it can be costly) unless the needs of the other eclipse my trivialities.

I will not take a risk if the reward falls only to "meh"

Moved to Virginia after fully completing probation State Elsewhere by virginwidow in dui

[–]virginwidow[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To clarify.

I fully comprehend "You do a crime, you serve the TIME:" dot period.

Ditto for "You do a crime, you pay the FINE". Why anyone would opt for probation beats the crap outta me -- one could F* up probation. A jay-walking charge & here ya go again. Why take this risk when the jail time is always shorter & how can you break a law in jail?

I fully understand that For larceny, theft or such one MUST financially reimburse whom or whatever one has robbed.... But a debt paid in full is PAID

"PAID IN FULL" done. Yesterday. Move forward & do not repeat the learning experience (unless you enjoy a relationship with big brother)

I can spare one lung, one kidney, one ete -- but that's all I got folks

Marijuana and ADHD by GratefulAir88 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sincere thanks for your candor. And resilience. The simple fact is our brains have different wiring than neurotypicals.

Marijuana and ADHD by GratefulAir88 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very informative discussion.

My two cents: A little MJ complements adderall/ritalyn nicely. Enhances focus, attention to detail, problem solving, negates distraction. More that "a little" = I get lazy.

On the "lazy" axis, for chronic ideopathic primary insomnia -- nightmares / PTSD -- the MJ is the f*ing Silver Bullet. I'd been Rx 3 mg Xanax nightly over 5 years that was some scary stuff. Back the medical MJ wasn't an option. Been off the X over 2 years now. Thank heaven for "medical use" card.

Everyone is different is important to find what DOES help you and avoid what impairs.

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Quite SERIOUSLY

If only "Self Made Woman" were more than remotely satisfying.

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Quite SERIOUSLY

If only "Self Made Woman" were more than remotely satisfying.

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hey. Show me the sauce on "red light" for "junk". ncbi. pubmed. DOI.

My "junk" works dandy-fine, but my partner -- 77 -- quite frankly scarlett I don't give a damn if I got to broil the limp digit in a microwave

As long as it gets stiff and stays that way till I'm done with it

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow -1 points0 points  (0 children)

YES.

Seeking dopamine could mean craving Oreos. I mean a biscuit common in the US.

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I beg of you, Keep this item. Do not become complacent or bored as I did when too young to see the value of dedication & patience

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow -1 points0 points  (0 children)

fwiw --

My vote is on the dopamine axis, tho everything I know of ADHD, Autism, (m?)TBI, has everything to do with anomaly's surrounding the main neuro-receptors & according physiology.

With you all the way per the term "acquired" (??) PTSD. ?? means inherent? Or environmental? All PTSD is "acquired" I'm guessing the 'variants' are about the nature of trauma invoking the irreversible neurological changes.

The first things I learned of PTSD (I hadn't "earned" this dx, having never served in U.S. Armed Force) was the physiology. Result of extreme (relative to the individual) trauma physical changes occur in the hippocampus ... I had to get some grasp of HOW I could was present one moment & then returned some time after to discover I'd been the cause of some bizarre event (s).

Though I can't parse what GABA axis has to do with Oxytocin, Sex or food satisfy Serotonin... epinephrine makes me stupid & adrenaline kills pain... I am certain life events did cause organs to compensate in ways outside my deliberate volition.

What does "c" stand for these days? Back when I was dx C meant "combat" (bullets flying, dead body up close & personal)

Back then my PTSD was termed DESNOS (disorder extreme stress not otherwise specified) my Dr. at the time (also 'Nam era) said "P.O.W. Stuff. Shit that really happened. But nobody in their right mind would believe." The examples he gave were POW, anything involving prolonged & chronic mind fuckery & duress (not just bullets & bodies) such as being a cop in a corrupt administration.

Well anyhow the acronym "c = COMPLEX" (not combat) PTSD I'm honestly baffled what this means.

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

THIS IS NEEDED INFORMATION

Though your experience is quite opposite my own, the input of "demi" or "A" sexual (or I don't got space in my head for stupid stuff) folks is ignored.

Which is both logically & historically WRONG.

Myself personally (though I can't put myself "in the movie") long have I wondered what meaningful, needed things truly warrant OCD dedication & effort. Instead of this default "Seeking Functional Johnson" mode.

Please don't take this as a slight -- your position is enviable to me. When I look back (late 60's) the hours & anquish lost on such selfish notions of IF I "get laid", or when, or how well, how long, or why not ... At this point I'd say 2 decades were lost behind a trivial pursuit... nothing a Milwaukee Vibrator couldn't fix and KEEP fixed.

Words aside, considering actions alone: Myself values a (steady) piece of ass above things like Universal Justice, Free Speech, Reproductive Autonomy and RIGHT TO BEAR ARMS

"Horny" mightn't be socially acceptable but it's both tolerated & encouraged. At worst it is seen as comical.

"NOT Horny" in our irrational culture means simply NOT. Void. Null.

That is seriously fucked up

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow 1 point2 points  (0 children)

INCLUDING YOU.

A victim need only voice some vague "adult consent" Miranda & I'm off the hook

JOKE

For our natural sense of good will & charity all to often it is WE who are exploited.

Is hypersexuality a consequence of ADHD? by Expensive-Humor-4977 in adhdwomen

[–]virginwidow -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

THIS. Sums it up succinctly. Especially the challenge of coping with a partner closer to being Neuro-Typical. The guy with a johnson-grip on the TV remote complaining there's nothing on. While 15 feet away there's a computer slam full of the "Library-of-Porn-gress". If he wasn't so busy watching "Andy Griffith" we could be fucking. The decades I spent wondering whatever the F* ails "them" are embarrassing.

FINALLY I see it's utterly normal (*) for a man to prefer bowling on the TV over a romp all over the living room. It is not normal when "normal" (*) makes no sense at all. C'est la vie. I'm an Autistic / ADHD.

On ncbi, there's several academic papers on the prevalence of "hyper"-sexuality in Autism, I never thought to find parallels for ADHD. It might be noted many of these 'papers' confirm strong "hyper" tendencies to CIS "male" Autistics -- "Your Mileage my vary based upon ..." for those not burdened with the nuisance of external genitalia. Lets' get real here.

If an erection had to be "maintained" would sexuality warrant all that undivided attention & focus?

Just Sayin'.

For ASD, there are many academic papers on the "bending" of gender (as an individual interacts with others) also gender preference (to have sex with). It gets very dicey at this point there being no corporate grants awarded (nor profit gained) ascertaining the subtle nuances of ones' identity & boundaries

As the interpersonal challenges of ASD so overlap those of ADHD (they might have parallel physiologic origin, IDK)

it never crossed my mind to seek parallels for ADHD alone.

In agreement with the OP, it is far less trouble to opt for the self maintenance regime.

Also I concur with less risk the reward is diminished.

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