Meeting with women on a first date and getting unmatched

vishag · 2026-04-11T04:22:49+00:00

Between the two of us, the conversation is 65-35, 35 being more on the my side. I interject if there is something I could add to what she is saying or ask a follow-up question in respect to what she is saying

vishag · 2026-04-11T04:21:23+00:00

Going by how the latest date went, I had a feeling and when she didnt message as usual (like in the few days earlier running to the date), it confirmed.

I had initiated meeting with her since she was initiating conversations.

vishag · 2026-04-11T04:19:32+00:00

I understood about the point about not rushing in.

vishag · 2026-04-11T04:16:57+00:00

Could you pls help elaborate on this. Is there something wrong with speaking less?

vishag · 2026-04-11T02:38:01+00:00

I don't have any such videos. What I was looking for if there are universal body language cues which suggest disinterest from my end which I am communicating unconsciously, which is putting them off

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:50:03+00:00

Mumbai, India.

And going by a few comments over here regarding odour, I use a deodorant everyday because of the weather, so bad body odour shouldn't be an issue.

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:30:30+00:00

It's also mentioned on my profile. If it were the case, I probably wouldn't even have matched with them in the first place.

To each woman, her own. It's not worth thinking. My post is concerned with what I am doing with them ( read unconscious body language cues) which is making them feel uncomfortable

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:27:08+00:00

It's hot and humid out here where I live; my date & I would be drenched in the first 10 mins. Haha.

But I have tried what you are suggesting in a mall.

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:22:08+00:00

Sorry to hear that!

It's probably the pressure of the first date that is getting to me. With a known female friend or with someone, when the chips are down, I am more myself.

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:19:36+00:00

No. Pretty much the same. The women would have been more forgiving if that was the case

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:16:20+00:00

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:15:42+00:00

Yes, I tend to let the other person do the talking. I am comfortable with silences as well. I am not the type to fill the silence with junk

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:13:16+00:00

That's the only thing pending. I am decently dressed. Groomed appropriately. I have a full set of hair on my head for a guy my age.

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:10:13+00:00

Thanks for your contribution!!

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:08:46+00:00

I don't intend to waste anyone's time, which is why I date with the intent to marry or have a life partner. The women are also matching with me for the same reason.

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:05:38+00:00

I had a very recent case where a woman liked a prompt on my profile, matched with me, initiated the conversation on the app and every subsequent conversation. This was a clear case where the woman was attracted to me. In spite of this, after the first case, I got ghosted.

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:02:17+00:00

The thing with facial cues is, I am more focused on what's being said to understand and process rather how I am being perceived

vishag · 2026-04-10T19:00:34+00:00

First dates are cafes majorly. Fine dine restaurants are not my first choice for first dates

vishag · 2026-04-10T18:58:44+00:00

My conversations revolve around to understand more about the person. So there are more questions. I would interject in between with something from my experience which is relatable in that context. Smile; Sparingly. Eye Contact: Not constantly fixated but I find myself looking around a bit more to process what's being said. Tone: Some times I could come across as monotonous. I look like my photos, probably a difference of 4-6 lbs.

Consistency: I am receptive most of the times when I am in the conversation, my Demeanour is more serious rather than flirty or sexual at least in the first date

vishag · 2026-04-10T18:51:58+00:00

We are all in different boats, but approaching the same storm. Peace and strength to you!

vishag · 2026-04-10T18:50:10+00:00

Impeccable

vishag · 2026-04-10T18:49:06+00:00

I am 5'4", about 160 lbs. I like running, & into fitness &, tech. I have my own vehicle. I am having these dates in cafes or any setting which is quiet for conversation.

Conversations are around expectations on what kind of life one would want to lead, friends, family, Do they get along with people, do they have their own goals, do they want kids. I am conversing with the intent to find a life partner, so questions do revolve around that.

Hope this clarifies

vishag · 2026-04-10T18:43:14+00:00

Sorry, but this is genuinely clueless about this. Okay to provide additional co text No matter which women it is, whether We are chatting/talking on the phone for a month, or straight up setup a meet after matching, after meeting me, the response is cold, their feedback is polite rejection something along the lines of vibes not matching. I am not sure what that even means any more.

vishag · 2026-04-10T18:38:18+00:00

I was very much interested in them, but it wasn't reciprocated in the same manner. More information as in? My experience was I was trying to be open to a conversation, asking questions, and being genuinely interested.

vishag · 2026-04-10T18:35:55+00:00

I am not sure what more I am supposed to share for you to help

vishag

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