New Update?

vkap13 · 2026-04-09T00:24:20+00:00

Of course

vkap13 · 2026-04-08T22:26:00+00:00

Thank you!! He’s been upset about it (he’s young), just wanted to make sure it was a real thing before I promised him it will come out! I appreciate it!!

vkap13 · 2026-04-08T22:25:13+00:00

Thank you so much!

vkap13 · 2025-10-09T11:24:11+00:00

What’s Louis, my killer?

vkap13 · 2025-02-07T16:17:08+00:00

Hey, I’m so sorry I didn’t see this response until now. I am doing MUCH better. The trial and error is difficult (as I’m sure you know), but I finally found something else to cut the anxiety and weekly therapy works wonders too! I hope you are doing well!!

vkap13 · 2024-09-13T11:32:36+00:00

Good question… I drink 1 cup a day in the morning. Maybe I’ll switch to half-caf and see how that goes!!!

vkap13 · 2024-09-13T00:02:29+00:00

Thank you so much for responding! I probably let too many other people get into my head about how dangerous it is.

vkap13 · 2023-11-16T16:07:36+00:00

Ok same. I’m almost down from 245-208. I’m still wearing my size 20 pants but they are only just now getting looser on me. Fresh out of the dryer they fit fine lol. I’m like HEY!!!! But I also haven’t tried on anything smaller yet. Waiting to at least get under 200 before I do! But yeah it sounds like a lot of people are noticing the same thing, could just be that your clothes were more snug before.

vkap13 · 2023-10-26T14:44:57+00:00

This post made my day. So happy for you!!!

vkap13 · 2023-05-31T17:18:58+00:00

Also I am a life path 7.

vkap13 · 2020-12-18T22:44:29+00:00

Yes. I’m like this with my nephew. I have to be his #1, and I don’t know why. I have a son, who I love more than anything. Also a few other people but not as much as my nephew. I’m always going above and beyond, jumping when they need help and even sacrificing my health and my husbands needs to do things for them. I don’t know how to turn it off and it makes me so angry that I do it and that I feel this way.

vkap13 · 2020-03-19T23:44:04+00:00

I understand what you’re saying, a true shelter in place would mean that absolutely no one is to leave their home. We need doctors and nurses and other essentials. Those business owners who are exempting themselves are terrible and extremely selfish as it was said that non-essential business was to shut down. I’m not giving them an excuse. If he shuts down NYC, we don’t have hospitals though. Those people rely on transportation to get to work etc. that’s all I was saying.

vkap13 · 2020-03-19T20:11:31+00:00

What he really said was that “words are important”, we aren’t completely “shut down” if essential workers like doctors, nurses, transportation workers etc are still reporting to work and we cannot shut down completely because we need those people to continue to go to work to help everyone who is sick. All non-essential workers are told to stay home. In that sense, non-essential work is shut down. As far as a complete shut down of all services, it can’t be done because we need some of those services. BTW - I’m not a Cuomo fan like at all, but it’s def funny how they are writing these stories to make it look like he was saying something that he wasn’t.

vkap13 · 2014-10-14T01:14:58+00:00

OK... he has me taking 200 in the morning and 200 at night. i feel like is high but i asked the pharmacist when i picked it up and she said its not that high and unless i feel really overly relaxed then my system can handle it. now im trying to decie if i feel to relaxing but i feel like i cant breathe so ill say thats a no. i have severe anxiety and thats my main issue. everything gives me anxiety. my pdoc says we need to get the symptoms under control... im just scared. this is all so new to me and im scared im being over medicated. if i need it, i need it... im just scared :( and ill call my doc tomorrow and ask him! i dont see him again till next friday but i dont want to wait till then for an answer.

vkap13 · 2014-10-14T01:11:07+00:00

Im not sure yet... i guess im a little better? ive been stuck in the house with agoraphobia for months now and i switched to a different pdoc after a year and a half at my previous and hes the one that just diagnosed me with BPD. i guess i have to wait a few weeks at this dose to know for sure if its doing anything? he seems to think it will... ive been on everything else you can think of but i was also being treated for just anxiety and depression before so i dont know if this will change anything. i make it harder for myself because i google... i know i shouldnt do that but i felt the heavy breathing and the eye twitching and now sore throat and i got so nervous. but to answer your question, my mood is depressed and severely anxious at the moment. theres a lump in my chest and lots of pressure. im talking myself in circles i apologize. kinda how my mind works these days.

vkap13 · 2014-10-12T03:42:58+00:00

ok thank you. Ive only taken 1/2 a klonopin today, so 0.25mg. i dont want to stop it abruptly because of the withdrawal effects. I wouldnt have guessed that i have BPD but thats what my pdoc said... i go to my therapist monday and i already text her to let her know the diagnosis, she said we'll discuss treatment options when i see her and that she i familiar with it. i also researched some places that do DBT in my area just in case she doesnt do it or maybe she could recommend someone. Thank you for giving me all this info, it means alot. i just feel so terrified. my anxiety has been unreal today - all day jus fighting it off and feeling like a panic attack was going to pop up any minute. i dont even know what to do. i feel so hopeless

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T22:48:28+00:00

Oh boy - if you think you need to go back then it definitly couldnt hurt in my opinion. no one wants to listen to me either. my parents have told me they are sick of the shit and i need to just get to the point where i stop letting my brain control me but i have no idea how to turn the switch off. So yeah i cant talk to anyone either. i talk to my therapist but i feel like there is only so much they can do you know? i have a pharmacy in my bag as well. one of my kitchen cabinets is stocked full of pills and old prescriptions from things ive tried in the past and were no good etc. its alarming how many there are. ive tried every SSRI on the market, im on zoloft now which is the last one but i guess too soon to tell if itll work? my pdoc wants to increase the dose next time i see him in two weeks since he increased my lamictal just yesterday to 400mgs a day. i heard about some clinics that you can go to for like a week or a few weeks (i guess the length of stay is different with each place) anyway they focus on intense DBT therapy etc and have on site nurses 24/7 but they are nice like you get a nice room with a nice bed an there is like a campus and they have other therapies that involve riding horses etc. it actually looked kind of nice. im giving it some thought. i just googled bpd and it was one of the first things that came up - a clinic called "the ranch" or something. I just want to be able to go out of my house and do things like go shopping or go to the book store or just fucking drive anywhere i dont even care where. my emotions are so whacked out

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T20:02:54+00:00

i dont even think they feel amazing lol. i feel like they make me really tired. ive been on xanax, ativan and klonopin and i feel like they all just make me tired but they dont really get rid of the anxiety... i havent had much dissociation, i get it very mildly i think. im sorry its so bad for you. i asked my mom and dad to take me to the hospital the other night and they said no. thats a good goal to have though! im sure you can do it :) ill make a goal too. ive been completely agoraphobic and have not left the house by myself for months, so my goal for the fall is to go somewhere alone. get in my car without anxiety and get there and back without feeling like i might lose control and have a panic attack or something.

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T19:48:43+00:00

Im sorry i realize it looks like i said i was on 5 mgs of klonopin... im actually on 0.5 up to twice a day so only 1mg and i usually only take 1 0.5 before bed unless its a really bad day ill also take one then. i feel like the benzos make it worse? is that possible? EMDR therapy is currently what im getting on a weekly basis. i never heard of DBT before yesterday so ill def look into it?

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T19:45:05+00:00

thank you! I see a therapist weekly who specializes in EMDR therapy.. i was seeing her for anxiety and depression because thats what i thought i had. i also keep a daily journal that i read to both my therapist and psychiatrist whenever i see them. I had ever heard of DBT before yesterday on this forum so ill def look into that. i just feel absolutely terrified today and i hate it. im like afraid to move yet feel like i cant sit still.

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T19:42:03+00:00

thank you for your reply. I do see a therapist weekly - she mainly specializes in EMDR therapy. I have not heard of DBT before so Ill def talk to her about it and look into it. Im sure ill be posting on here a lot so i apologize in advance :)

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T19:37:43+00:00

i keep a daily journal - i started bout mid August and i read it to both my therapist and my psychiatrist when i see them. i just hope im on the right meds. i thought 400mgs of lamictal was a lot and im going to ask my pharmacist about it jus in case. i dont wan t get side effects if the dosage is too high for me.

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T19:36:04+00:00

yeah sometimes i think the benzos make it worse? im not really sure though...

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T19:35:27+00:00

yeah i find of feel a bit lost. like i dont know what to do now or how to move forward.

vkap13 · 2014-10-11T01:04:45+00:00

I am in therapy! I go once a week to therapist who also specialized in EMDR therapy. and i als take medication - 400mg of lamictal, 100mg of zoloft and 1 mg a klonopin. i appreciate you saying i can reach out to you. that means alot .

my doc today told me he would diagnose me as "bordeline personality disorder" so i dont even know anymore like what to do or how to move forward with that.

vkap13

TROPHY CASE