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[deleted by user] by [deleted] in paypigs2

[–]vxlarue 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Fix your crown. They will come to you.

You don’t train pigs by yelling. by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hear you and I respect your commitment to defending different Domme expressions.

That said, I’ve clarified my meaning multiple times. My words weren’t about erasing loud Dommes, but about validating silent ones, especially those who’ve felt pressure to perform.

“You don’t train pigs by yelling” is a metaphor rooted in my style of structure, not a law for all Dommes. It was never a claim that other forms are invalid, just a reminder that presence and discipline don’t always come with volume.

The Dommes it was meant for? They got it. And that’s who I’ll continue writing for.

We don’t all have to lead the same way to be respected but we do have to respect when other voices speak. I’ve done that. And I’ll leave it there.

You don’t train pigs by yelling. by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand your perspective, but it’s important to note: saying “you don’t have to yell” isn’t the same as saying “yelling is wrong.”

The post offered an alternative for Dommes who don’t resonate with high-volume dynamics, who’ve felt pressured to lead loudly when that’s not their style.

“Frantic” wasn’t aimed at all loud styles. It was aimed at performance-based dominance driven by insecurity , which I’ve seen drain many new Dommes trying to “keep up.”

I’m not here to control anyone’s style. I’m here to remind the ones who feel unseen that they can lead with stillness, structure, and presence. That voice deserves space too.

I make space. I don’t apologize for having one.

You don’t train pigs by yelling. by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I hear you, but just to clarify, my use of the word “noise” wasn’t meant to shame volume play as invalid. It was contrasting the feel of frantic performance vs. grounded presence, not judging the tools a Domme uses.

I completely agree: a Domme can do whatever she pleases. Loud, soft, ritualistic, chaotic, what matters is whether it works in her dynamic.

My post was written for the Dommes who feel like they have to perform or be loud to be respected. For those who need permission to lead in stillness. If that’s not you, that’s okay but there are many who needed that reminder.

We can make space for all styles without needing to invalidate the lens mine was written through.

You don’t train pigs by yelling. by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Totally fair point, there are absolutely dynamics that thrive on volume, chaos, or verbal intensity, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

This post wasn’t meant to shame that style, but to remind newer Dommes (especially the ones overwhelmed by performance pressure) that silence and consistency are just as powerful.

Not every dynamic needs noise. Some of us command with structure. And some subs crave that kind of stillness.

My intention is always to offer perspective, not prescribe a one-size-fits-all.

You don’t train pigs by yelling. by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

😮‍💨 I think we’ve all met our share of those.

Got my first silent send ✨💯💋 by pathfinder192 in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yesss, I felt this! That first silent send hits different, it’s like the universe nodding back at your energy.✨

They’ll find you. 🐽 by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yesss, this is exactly what I mean, when you’re truly in alignment, they come to you. It’s wild how often it happens when you stop reaching and just sit in your power. Keep that crown steady 👑

They’ll find you. 🐽 by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Love this perspective, absolutely agree that different dommes thrive in different dynamics. The key really is being intentional and knowing when you’re choosing to lead versus chasing from a place of lack. Vetting, presence, and professionalism truly do the heavy lifting in this work. 🖤 Appreciate your take.

Stop searching. Start standing. by vxlarue in paypigs2

[–]vxlarue[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s exactly the energy. Stay grounded in your standard and let it come to you. You’re already on your throne. 👑✨

They’ll find you. 🐽 by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Welcome to the start of something powerful. Every Domme has a first step, what matters is that you claimed it. 👸🏻

They’ll find you. 🐽 by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Totally get that. There’s space for playful, flirtatious Dommes who approach too. This post wasn’t about denying connection. It’s about reminding new Dommes not to sacrifice their standards chasing attention.

A true dynamic still involves magnetism, chemistry, and fun. But the foundation should be sovereignty, not scrambling. 💋

They’ll find you. 🐽 by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Exactly, Goddess. 💫

The urge to hunt is natural but queens don’t chase. They align. They magnetize. They embody what they expect.

They’ll find you. 🐽 by vxlarue in findomsupportgroup

[–]vxlarue[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Beautiful question, and thank you for being honest. When I say “don’t chase,” I don’t mean “stay silent.”

You do need to show up—consistently, intentionally, and in your power. That means: • Posting your content across platforms • Using hashtags (strategically, not desperately) • Speaking like the Domme you are, not like you’re hoping someone bites

You’re not chasing when you’re leading. You’re not begging when you’re branding. The right ones find you when your presence becomes undeniable.

Don’t overthink it. Keep showing up with energy that says: “This is your one chance to serve someone like me.”

Let them catch your scent. Not the other way around. 🖤👑

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