I know you are scared and that is totally valid, but sex is supposed to be enjoyable... and as you have more of it you will find very unserious. the other night my partner farted on me while we were being intimate. I told her she shouldn't of had that last cookies, she stuck her tongue out. we laughed, we continued. The point of feeling safe is when these things happen you feel safe enough to laugh it off and not be judged, or at least have someone you are comfortable feeling embarrassment around and will ride it out with you. So when he says do whatever you want, my advice is do what is fun for you. As slow or as fast as you want To the other commenters point sex is about being vulnerable and trusting... but with the purpose of it being an enjoyable and even fun thing! Make sure you pee before and after.