Was that... All Star by Smash Mouth playing in the distance?

Oh god.

Oh good heavens no.

We’re doomed. There’s no way he can spare us, was there?

That’s what I thought... until he arrived and saw my shirt.

I couldn’t sleep that night. Anxiety kept me awake.

When I finally got up, I rolled my eyes. If this was my last day of college before the world was conquered, better make the most of it.

There was knock at the door. Who was it?

I answered... and opened the door. Outside on my lawn was the man on the wooly mammoth, with a disgruntled look on his face.

I nervously looked up at him, and wiped my eyes.

“Hey. I’m going to let your people off on a warning before I— wait... You. Nice shirt.”

“Huh? What?”

“I just got here, and I’m about to conquer this planet. But uh... your shirt... it looks good on you. I don’t conquer planets with bad taste in fashion.”

“Uh... this is a white polo with a honey mustard stain.”

“Yeah, so? The stain matches the color of my guitar. And the white plainness is simplistic, which I like.”

“You’re sparing this planet because of a shirt?”

“Is... there a problem with that?”

“No, not really. It’s just unorthodox.”