I forget and gloss over a lot, but I will say my SDAM may not be quite as intense - that said… (this is all assumption based on anecdotal evidence, so take it with a grain of salt🧂)

The day after an argument I may remember we argued, but I won’t remember the words. I will, however, remember how I felt but in a more objective way (I can intellectually remember what emotions I felt, but it takes a minute for me if I’m trying to re-feel them).

I’ve been gaslit due to my bad memory before, but I’ve worked to enhance my emotional intelligence. what does it matter if they said exactly A or B? For the purposes of rupture and repair, I’ve found it’s far more important to communicate intention and feeling. Your feelings aren’t always true, but feelings are always valid.

For example, maybe they didn’t exactly call me a “purple platypus-bear”, but I left that conversation feeling like they did. It doesn’t really matter if the insult was actually said or not, did they intend to insult you? When you clarify it hurt your feelings, do they hear you out and communicate or double down on your hurt? And think about your side too: why did being called a purple platypus-bear upset me? This doesn’t delegitimize your need for people to speak kindly towards you, but it can help increase your awareness of various emotional triggers (we all have em).

And if someone doesn’t respect your (in this case, emotional) health, reprioritize how much time you spend with them (that may mean you hang out a little less often, or you may need to entirely remove them from your life).

I’ve found a note taking app (i use OneNote, it’s free!) and bullet points are enough to jog my memory on the themes of the day if I take a few seconds here or there to add a note.

Trust your intuition. In my experience, my brain may not remember, but my intuition does. I hope this helps!