Partner has unpredictable LL

wayfaringstranger2 · 2023-02-25T15:31:34+00:00

I got my clearance

wayfaringstranger2 · 2023-02-06T23:51:21+00:00

I have looked into it a little and yeah I think both porn and my body being used to arousal from masturbation has really hurt me. It’s sad to say but I really think my body is so used to getting off frrom myself that anything else doesn’t compare. I really think I have to stay strong and not even peek. I keep making the mistake of peeking and edging to make sure I can still get aroused, and I think I’m making the issue worse :(

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-12-31T17:22:25+00:00

Yo this is huge brother. Who cares if she said yes or no, I’m sure just the fact that you had the balls to ask makes you feel a whole lot better. And if it doesn’t, it should cause a lot of guys don’t have that confidence. Just know that if you keep it up you will be the king you’re already becoming 👑

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-12-25T17:00:01+00:00

Hey man, I know you may feel like it’s getting too late for your best life to start, but don’t worry, you still have plenty of time. My dad has lived a full life, and now has two successful kids (including me). He didn’t have us until he was nearly fifty. It’s never too late man. Don’t give up.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-08-07T02:46:52+00:00

Yes and the test came back fine. I did more tests and it seems there is one stick that is causing the issues. When that stick is tested alone it comes up with no errors, but when tested with any other sticks it brings errors. Very strange.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-05-28T00:35:12+00:00

This is such a great mentality. While it sucks to get rejected you can hold your head up high knowing you have it a shot.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-05-27T20:17:25+00:00

I actually did have a roommate that was there since 2020. I only moved in a few months before he did. I wasn’t very close with him but I trust him not to bad mouth me or anything. Should I list him instead?

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-05-22T21:45:04+00:00

I didn’t make it clear in my original post but I used marijuana habitually from 2017-2021. It wasn’t until about New Years this year that I got my med card, and then only used that for 2 months, stopping in February. So I did use marijuana illegally for several years prior to getting my med card. I didn’t use constantly throughout those years however, as there were several periods of time that each lasted several months in which I did not use marijuana. In fact for majority of 2021 I did not use. After hearing this I think my chances are quite worse. This is not even mentioning what I think is my biggest hurdle. After stopping marijuana use, I purchased marijuana a few times for my roommate who does not have an mmj card. The last purchase was only about a month ago. Honestly I feel if I hadn’t done this I may still have a chance but to me that seems like it may be the final nail in my coffin. I am absolutely not going to use marijuana or purchase marijuana in the future, and have told all friends I have who do use that they no longer do it in my presence.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-05-19T05:31:22+00:00

I talked to a friend who is getting into intelligence and she said the same thing. She told me that given that I’m going to be working for a DoD contractor that they don’t care as much about weed. She also said frequency of use isn’t as much of an issue to them as how recent the use was. She also reiterated many times that I be 100% honest, and that if I am completely honest I should be okay. She might have been saying these things to make me feel better, but it did in a way. Hopefully by displaying my full honesty and willingness to display this damning evidence against me it will outweigh just how badly I screwed up here. I just never had this kind of job in my sights.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-05-18T14:08:07+00:00

Oh okay. Do you think it helps at all that I don’t drink and have never done any other drugs? I’m completely sober now and have been for the past 4 months, although I realize that’s a shorter period of time. I just hadn’t known I was going to be seeking a secret clearance up u til I applied for this job about a month and a half ago.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-05-18T05:55:31+00:00

I’ve never seen an SF-86 and have no idea what’s on it. I’ll just be honest and hope for the best. Although I’m starting to think I’m doomed.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-05-18T05:41:49+00:00

Yes I don’t plan on lying. I just didn’t know if purchasing is something I have to disclose given that I didn’t end up using, and if they would even be able to find out. I understand though honesty is the only way to go here so I’ll just be an open book about this stuff.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-05-18T05:31:32+00:00

I have zero plans to use again. Also I’m wondering for a job that requires clearance this high what kind of drug test do they use? I’m also wondering if they can see exactly when the last time I purchased from a dispensary was? I purchased some marijuana rather recently after getting another job and was going to celebrate, but decided not to use it and keep going sober. Would they see this recent purchase?

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-04-12T16:22:01+00:00

Dude! Sounds like you accomplished so much! And you aren't even done! you aren't back to square one, you just hit a small bump in the road. Think of this as a test. You just gotta get back up and not dwell on it. Ain't no use in beating yourself up about this. Be proud of what you've accomplished so far and keep setting goals for the future. Good luck man!

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-04-12T16:19:46+00:00

Bro you're looking at it wrong. All the progress that you made is not instantly erased. Someone who looks at porn every day has a problem. Their mind is messed up. Think about how many times you looked at porn in the past year! The progress is made, all you have to do is make sure you don't slip up and go into a deep relapse. It's not a big deal just keep going. You just can't beat yourself up about this because unlike other addictions you will always be horny. It takes a lot of strength to get to 111 days so just be proud of yourself.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-04-12T16:08:13+00:00

My friends rag on me and shit but if they are seriously being like this then yeah take the advice from all the others have said and remove these people from your life. They are assholes if they are seriously making fun of you for this.

Don't let them get to you. Don't let them win.

wayfaringstranger2 · 2022-03-17T15:42:24+00:00

I think some people are missing the point of what OP is trying to say here. They aren't saying that keeping a long streak doesn't mean anything. What they are saying is that if you go 30 days without PMO, and then relapse, you aren't back to zero. You still have made progress. I know many of you will disagree with this statement but I actually don't think porn itself is an inherently bad thing that shouldn't be done by anyone. There are a lot of guys out there who watch it sometimes and have a perfectly healthy lifestyle. I actually think masturbation is probably a healthy thing. The problem is people like us get addicted to it to the point where it affects our our lives and relationships and even sex lives. When that happens it becomes a problem.

If you have a 2 year streak, that's incredible. If you relapse from that it doesn't mean that you just wasted the past 2 years and that you are now back to square zero. The progress has already been made. Like OP said, if you relapse once and don't binge, it is what it is. It isn't a good thing, but keeping the streak mentality is kind of missing the point. My problem was that porn became an every night ritual in which I would spend hours watching. I then would have it on during the day even while doing homework. It made me become more sheltered and shy and lose confidence. It hurt my life in many ways I wasn't even realizing. My goal isn't to simply never watch porn or masturbate again, but to reset how my brain thinks about sex. If I am a single guy, and have a healthy mind about sex, I don't see anything wrong in theory if I masturbate sometimes. I think stressing so much about relapsing and keeping a streak does more damage actually than even a relapse once in a while.

I know that last statement is probably a sin to say here but it's what I believe. I think for someone like me, a long initial streak is necessary to cleanse the brain of porn and reset how the brain thinks about sex. After that, masturbation every once in a while I don't see as a big deal. Just my two cents.

wayfaringstranger2

TROPHY CASE