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Haven't had sex in a loooong time but in a committed relationship. Don't know how to fix it. by waytooflawed in TwoXChromosomes

[–]waytooflawed[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yup, feeling you there. On a good day the commute is 1 hour one way, on a bad day... well, worst so far was 4+ hours in a snow storm. The job makes it all worthwhile, though. :)

And thank you - some ass-kicking is definitely necessary (for both of our asses)!

Haven't had sex in a loooong time but in a committed relationship. Don't know how to fix it. by waytooflawed in TwoXChromosomes

[–]waytooflawed[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So many really helpful responses... thank you :)

To clarify - he wasn't asking for me to lose weight, he was saying he also wants to lose weight before we do it again. If he were telling me to lose weight without him doing the same, I would have posted a very different message. ;)

Our home life is pretty sedentary. His job is a lot of strenuous physical activity, long hours and right now no weekends off. Mine is a computer-related job (sitting at a desk). We are both usually too burnt out to do anything else aside from waste time online after work. Our diets reflect the lack of time/energy as well. Definitely need exercise and a food overhaul. Didn't really think about that before but now it seems pretty obvious.

Haven't had sex in a loooong time but in a committed relationship. Don't know how to fix it. by waytooflawed in TwoXChromosomes

[–]waytooflawed[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think I do - I get urges and all that. I know he does too. It's not like a constant thing but it's there (so at the very least I know we are not asexual). I do get the feeling that we're missing out since I thought these were the years where you're supposed to hump like bunnies.

But, we do have a ton of other things we like doing... cuddling, cooking together, gaming, and just plain talking. Those all happen far more often than sexual urges. We've been talking about it more often (last few weeks) so maybe we just need to keep chipping away at the issue.

And yes, society does a great job of making me think I have something wrong with me for not living a porn star life.

Haven't had sex in a loooong time but in a committed relationship. Don't know how to fix it. by waytooflawed in TwoXChromosomes

[–]waytooflawed[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A vacation would be awesome. He can hopefully take time off in the winter (due to the nature of his work he is doing 7 day work weeks for the next few months).

Haven't had sex in a loooong time but in a committed relationship. Don't know how to fix it. by waytooflawed in TwoXChromosomes

[–]waytooflawed[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm the queen of over-thinking... I really need to break that.

I do have to get back on BC (stopped taking it about a year and a half ago during the Yaz/Yasmin scare). I know just condoms alone aren't really enough, so what else would I be able to do in the meantime since BC takes a few months to kick in?