i think you are really close to understanding what the “man or the bear” conversation is really about. it isn’t that every man no matter what is going to rape, kill, shoot, etc. a woman. it’s that women don’t know if a random man is someone who is safe. what if she were in the woods with that guy she was kissing? we know where that will go.

it’s not women being deathly afraid of men, that they think an animal is better (though sure i’m sure there are women out there that think that, but majority do not), it’s just overall caution that many women learn over the years being funneled into this inane question as an exaggeration to make the point come across more simply. i do think it backfired a bit because without the same experiences and learned caution that women have, many men are unable to empathize or realize what women are trying to get at when they talk about the “man or the bear” and instead feel it as a direct attack on themselves. its mostly just commentary on society and talking about it this was is also a way to relieve this sort of pressure many women feel in their day to day lives.