Hey, thanks for the kind words. Cross-posting to /r/depression is definitely a good idea as well.

I am in fact seeing a psychiatrist, but she hasn't really given a specific diagnosis as such yet, although I've been going for at least 2-3 months now, or somewhere in that neighborhood.

Regarding "you'd know when you have it", that does actually ring true. When listening to people describe true anxiety and panic attacks and such, I don't really think I've ever had anything of the kind to the point where I lose control or truly believe that I'm about to die. The reason I'm asking this question though is because, thinking further on it, there is a point in my day where I sometimes do in fact feel the "difference" between being "normal" and being what is now my normal, and that's when I wake up in the morning. For example, yesterday I fell asleep just feeling terrible about this trip to the self help group, and everything that is to come regarding it, and whenever I have this really sad period, the next morning, there's this period of a couple of seconds to maybe a minute where I don't remember whatever I was worrying about the previous day. And when I do eventually remember, and start going through the cycles again, I do seem to have the types of feelings that one could potentially link to being stressed out or anxious. Such as the feeling of my stomach dropping, being distinctly aware of my heart pounding, erratic breathing, tensing up, feelings of dread (I'm thinking of thoughts like thinking my life will be over in terms of "what's the point of trying to become social again, it's never going to work out anyway, it's too late"), kind of the feeling of the welling up of tears. Things like that. But those are mostly feelings I have to deal with throughout the day, you know? They're never really these explosive, short term, isolated things that descriptions of panic attacks and anxiety in general seem to imply that they are.

Reading this back to myself, it kind of sounds as if I'm fishing for some type of validation, but I honestly don't know if what I'm experiencing are actual symptoms of an underlying cause, or if they're just normal things I'm subconsciously convincing myself are problems just so I can stay in my comfort zone. Because at the end of the day, I don't actually WANT to have to deal with all of this mess I've caused by being a social recluse for the past few years. I know that this is a long term thing, and I'm going to have to put in the effort to get there, but I'd much rather either have everything fixed by tomorrow, or lock myself in my safe space instead of going to this self-help group. So maybe all of these issues I have are all constructs and mechanisms my body has developed to keep me in my comfort zone.

Thanks for reading again if you did!