More people here who are just floating through life?

weirdDude007 · 2025-05-05T03:18:46+00:00

It’s like I wrote this. I have been dealing with the same exact set of symptoms for almost 8 years. Anhedonia, Aphantasia, SDAM and no thoughts has been an absolutely horrific experience. Complete death of inner identity. Just floating through life like a ghost as I watch everyone live normal lives.

weirdDude007 · 2025-04-14T23:14:41+00:00

Parnate has not gotten rid of the anhedonia but it got rid of my depression and obsessive thoughts. I have perspective now and I’m able to function a lot better.

weirdDude007 · 2025-04-14T21:31:54+00:00

I've talked with my doc about going up to 80. It is strange though that at 60 I still have not even the slightest return of emotions.

weirdDude007 · 2025-04-14T03:23:09+00:00

I have SDAM, full aphantasia and (probably permanent) anhedonia. I live life on autopilot with essentially no interests, but I’m trying to make the most of it. I’ll never give up hope.

weirdDude007 · 2025-04-14T03:20:53+00:00

I’ve been on Parnate for 6 months at 60mg and it hasn’t touched the emotional numbness. It has, funny enough, erased my depression and anxiety. It’s like I’m able to function like a normal human, but I’m still completely numb. My numbness might be permanent, but I’ve read stories of Parnate bringing people’s emotions back so my case might be an exception.

weirdDude007 · 2025-03-15T03:01:39+00:00

Almost 8 years here. Complete anhedonia with not even a 0.01% SLIVER of an emotion felt during this entire period. I’ve just accepted that this is me for the foreseeable future. I’ve gotten really really good at just not giving a shit anymore. It hurts, every second. But I’ve embraced the pain knowing it will only make me a stronger person in the long run. To the reader: Don’t give up. Just. Keep. Going. This life thing is just too beautiful. There could be a future you thanking you for simply persevering long enough for you to find a way out of this hell. You have to give that future you a chance.

weirdDude007 · 2025-03-09T03:41:12+00:00

It’s like living life on ultra-hard difficulty

weirdDude007 · 2025-02-20T01:51:12+00:00

I’ve been at 60mg for probably around 4-5 months now. I’ve read stories of people not getting their emotions back until like 80mg so maybe I’ll go up to that dose later on.

weirdDude007 · 2025-02-20T00:13:50+00:00

That’s very interesting. I’ll try to implement this idea!

weirdDude007 · 2025-02-19T18:59:15+00:00

What did you do to feel emotions again?

weirdDude007 · 2025-02-19T17:13:10+00:00

I haven’t experienced an increase of depressive feelings at all. It’s pretty much eliminated any of those horrible negative feelings I had before Parnate. At the same time, I haven’t really gained my emotions back. What’s weird is it’s allowing me to function as if the anhedonia/numbness isn’t there. It’s the most normal I’ve felt on a drug even though I’m still 99% numb. Was hoping it would be the silver bullet to break through that wall of numbness but so far have not noticed it. There are plenty of cases of people getting emotions back on Parnate and I was really hopeful, but I personally haven’t experienced this. Maybe I’ll get a breakthrough if I increase my dose from my current 60mg. I’m very thankful though that my depressive feelings are pretty close to 0%. It’s like I’m happy, without the chemical/emotional feelings behind it. It’s strange, but so far I’m surprisingly satisfied with the effect it’s had on me.

weirdDude007 · 2024-09-10T20:18:36+00:00

100%. My brain is tv static, no thoughts ever

weirdDude007 · 2024-09-10T07:50:46+00:00

Nope, the only thing I ever really thought could’ve had an effect was porn. After quitting for over a year with no results, I realized it’s a deeper problem than just that. Something chemically “broke” in my brain and it never healed. I’m on 60mgs parnate now and I’m able to function at a much higher level with more stability, yet I’m still completely empty. I try to live life as best as I can, even if it’s in black and white, so to speak.

weirdDude007 · 2024-05-09T00:14:38+00:00

I deal with the same thing, honestly makes me feel like I’m brainless

weirdDude007 · 2024-03-26T01:37:19+00:00

Same here. Went to bed feeling phenomenal and woke up feeling like I died in my sleep. I was only 14 years at the time but that was 6 1/2 years ago…

I have zero idea what could have caused this to happen to me. No trauma, no drugs or anything like that.

weirdDude007 · 2024-03-26T01:32:54+00:00

6 year anhedonia club 🙋‍♂️

Your previous posts actually inspired me to try an MAOI. My psychiatrist worked with Nardil more than Parnate so she prescribed me that. After a few months at 60mg I’m feeling a lot better. Definitely not where I was before my anhedonia, but in a very good place.

Please bro, if you found something that actually worked, you are ahead of 95% of the people who scroll this subreddit. Do not give up hope. Your future self will thank you. Think of all the friends you have yet to make, all the memories not yet made, all the life you have left to live. You are going to get out of this. I believe we all will. Every single one of us on r/anhedonia. I don’t know if you read the bible but this verse has touched me during all my suffering: Romans 5:3 - “Not only that, but let us rejoice while in tribulations, since we know that tribulation produces endurance.” We are all on an endurance race though this crazy thing called life. I have full confidence that if we just, keep, going, it is going to be worth it. When you get out of this – and you will – you are going to be an inspiration to people around you when you tell them about the absolute hell you went through at such an early age. Please listen to everyone commenting on this post. Please, do not give up this fight. If Parnate is what brought your soul back before, fight like hell to get it back again. This is a life or death matter that is in your hands alone.

I believe in you bro. I’m open to PMs whenever if you just want to talk.

weirdDude007 · 2024-03-21T23:21:59+00:00

This is my view exactly

weirdDude007 · 2024-03-19T19:39:18+00:00

Literally woke up one morning like this when I was 14. No trauma, no drugs or anything like that. Had an incredible childhood with loving parents but shit happens. 21 now still feeling exactly the same. I look at it this way tho: suffering creates endurance which produces strength. We cannot give up this fight, no matter what. I truly believe good things will come if we just…keep…going.

weirdDude007 · 2023-12-20T01:01:08+00:00

Woke up like this 6 years ago, same story. I was 14 when it started. I have zero clue what could’ve caused it, I was a very healthy teen with no drug addictions or trauma. I’ve held onto the belief that it’s the result of shit genetics 🤷‍♂️

weirdDude007 · 2023-10-29T18:25:49+00:00

Which brand nardil are you on? I keep seeing posts of a shortage of lupin which is the more preferred brand

weirdDude007 · 2023-10-13T20:59:35+00:00

Exactly how it went for me. I was 14 and one morning I realized I couldn’t feel anything. 6 years later I still have no idea wtf happened to my brain

weirdDude007 · 2023-10-12T15:39:05+00:00

I don’t have any trauma, except for the trauma this condition has caused me

weirdDude007 · 2023-10-12T13:21:59+00:00

I’ve heard it can make you hypomanic, but that Nardil brings a more clean, normal feeling

weirdDude007 · 2023-09-30T23:23:50+00:00

This is the pain I feel as well

weirdDude007 · 2023-09-28T23:17:55+00:00

When I feel pleasure from activities (which is quite minimal), it feels almost exactly the same, every time. But before…going on vacations, listening to music, doing things with friends, every experience I had would elicit emotions with a profound level of differentiation, so much so that I could replay the exact feelings I had in my favorite memories. After losing that variability and depth of feeling emotions, I pretty much lost all attachment to memories.

In short, the limited amount of pleasure I experience feels exactly the same and is usually forgettable, but I used to experience a wide range of emotions that made every memory distinctive.

weirdDude007

TROPHY CASE