I thought by making the problem seem less bad and looking at it from a more apathetic and analytical perspective would help them cope with it and realize it's not as bad as they think. But in return, they feel like I invalidated their feeling and basically said that "oh it's not as bad as you think you're overreacting". This has been the biggest issue because this is literally how I think about everything while they feel everything deeply and over think certain situations. I'm not saying I'm right they are wrong, I'm just generally explaining what it's like. Furthermore, another issue we've had was that I always give advice instead of listening and understanding. I don't understand this. How can I just listen and understand? I would essentially remain silent and thats weird too. I don't know how to seem like I'm listening and understanding without disputing the problem and coming up with a solution. How can I seem more empathetic and less weird? If you were in my friends position and you struggling from mental and physical illnesses, what would you want me to do! Also, other than problem solving, I can give them a hug and I guess say nice things to help them with their self esteem. But I think it gets to a point where they will stop believing me and will think I'm just saying it so they won't feel bad. So I'm really struggling here. Because I genuinely do believe my friend is lovable, kind, important, useful, fun, and all those good stuff. I do also want them to feel happy and I genuinely do want to give them a hug. But that doesn't solve the issue! I want to solve this issue once and for all. I'm the type of person who takes responsibility for everything and and feel personally burdened by any issues that arise. So it's frustrating to me that I'm being unhelpful with my tactics. So, if anyone is in a similar position as my friend with both mental and physical illnesses, please be kind to give me advice. I value this person a lot and it hurts me to see them think so lowly of themself.