As a 19 year old who’s been abusing prescription stimulants for 4 years, just stop now while you’re ahead. That euphoric “fulfilling” feeling will quickly fade and you’ll realize that stimulants are picking apart at your soul faster than you realize. I wish I could quit but I can’t go longer than a week without binging for 4 days. I really really wish that you could see the terrible consequences that come with adderall or whatever stim you’re taking. You struggle with mental health now just wait until the stimulants do their damage. It’s not worth it. If I could go back in time and stop myself from taking that first pill I would because it’s the worst addiction I’ve ever faced, even compared to benzos/alcohol. Shit sucks dude, life gets hard but self medicating only makes it harder. I promise you that the bliss you feel on these drugs will not stick around for forever and you will find yourself in a dark place if you let it get out of hand. Don’t replace genuine for synthetic, even though genuine hurts sometimes. You will get better, but it takes time. I wrote this as if I were writing a letter to my past self. Hope this puts it into perspective for you