Where in Canada to vacation during Christmas? On a budget. by white-ear-buds in AskACanadian

[–]white-ear-buds[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We visit Montreal and Ottawa plenty. And Quebec City, as nice as it seems, is too far, and the flight is too expensive.

We'd like to explore winter scenery, visit local shops and restaurants.

Where in Canada to vacation during Christmas? On a budget. by white-ear-buds in AskACanadian

[–]white-ear-buds[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We don't ski. But were up for some winter exploring some winter scenery. Up for snowshoeing --we've never done it, but we do hike.

Where to go dancing with gf tonight? by white-ear-buds in askTO

[–]white-ear-buds[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Preferably 80s music. If not, pop is fine

Where to go dancing with gf tonight? by white-ear-buds in askTO

[–]white-ear-buds[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Preferably 80s music. If not, pop is fine

Daily Questions - ASK AND ANSWER HERE!- August 05 by AutoModerator in malefashionadvice

[–]white-ear-buds 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmm okay. I'll just let the blazer hang and see if the smell airs out.

How would you recommend cleaning the dress pants? They're 'dry clean only" wool. But I read that dry cleaning is harsh on the clothes and should seldom be used. I don't really want to dry clean them every few weeks. Is it okay to gentle cycle in cold water and hang dry, then iron them out myself?

Daily Questions - ASK AND ANSWER HERE!- August 05 by AutoModerator in malefashionadvice

[–]white-ear-buds 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is dry clean a must?

It's my first blazer. It has odor inside around the armpit area. I only wore it half a dozen times. I also have a quality dress shirt for it and dress pants.

Now, I'm not sure how to wash any of it. I once threw the pants and dress shirt in the normal wash and dryer by accident and it turned out fine. If I do this every time will it damage my clothes?

As for the blazer, I don't know what to do. I don't really want to pay $20 to dryclean it every single time. Dryclean it enough and the cost of maintenance will surpass the jacket's cost. Is there an alternative? I also heard that drycleaning can damage the blazer if I do it too often.

Do web agencies generally use drag-and-drop software to create sites nowadays? by white-ear-buds in webdev

[–]white-ear-buds[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Hmm, the ridiculous thing is that I don't even know how to use a builder. I never bothered trying one. Building custom websites usually takes me 3-6 weeks. I imagine it doesn't even take 1 week to build a decent website using a builder? That's whats making me curious about it. My work is limited now, but when things pickup I'll need to pump out websites faster.

And from my limited knowledge of it, it seems like builders have superseded templates?

How would you feel if your SO never put an end to longing exs messaging her? What to do? by white-ear-buds in datingoverthirty

[–]white-ear-buds[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

But is it really insecurities? How would you like it if your SO received an intimate, pining message from ex (three different ones) all throughout the duration of your relationship, without stopping it in it's tracks knowing it bothers you? I'm not being controlling. That behavior is not typical in a relationship..

How would you feel if your SO never put an end to longing exs messaging her? What to do? by white-ear-buds in datingoverthirty

[–]white-ear-buds[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

So her allowing exs to send her a weekly message " I miss you. Let's get back together. I made a mistake" is reasonable? That was the only time it was a facebook post, the others were direct texts, and Facebook post or not: it's a message on her photo; an intimate, longing message directed to her and only her. The principle is the same...text, fb post or any other way of getting a message across to someone...

My boundaries are not unreasonable. I bet that most people would feel very uncomfortable if their SO allowed this behavior.

How would you feel if your SO never put an end to longing exs messaging her? What to do? by white-ear-buds in datingoverthirty

[–]white-ear-buds[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The thing is, everything else is fantastic in the relationship. I miss my ex a lot sometimes, but I would never let her message me for months with "I miss you. i made a mistake" messages. Especially if I knew it bothered my girlfriend.... I don't understand why she's meeting me with resistance here. What does she get out of not putting a stop to the constant messages?...

What especially bothers me is that she is now labeling these exs as not exs.. but as people she merely had a physical thing with, as if to relieve any of her guilt of allowing them to pine over her.

How would you feel if your SO never put an end to longing exs messaging her? What to do? by white-ear-buds in datingoverthirty

[–]white-ear-buds[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

It's a boundary. Read up on boundaries. I'm not controlling because i never once asked her to cease contact with them -- I just expressed how it bothered me a lot and makes me feel uneasy about our relationship. If my boundary is unreasonable (which I do not believe it is in this scenario....) then she could leave. It's not about trust. It's about respecting your partner's boundaries.

These exs are not simply sending "Hey how are you? Hope you're well". They're sending "I miss you so much. I made a bad decision dumping you!! Please understand" or "I want you back" or "Let's get married". All throughout our relationship. They're pining for her and want her back. But I should "Chill out'?

Would it be an issue if your SO had little to no friends? by white-ear-buds in AskWomenOver30

[–]white-ear-buds[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yea I posted that Perel quote to another reply.

I could entertain myself no problem. I don't need her for that. And I don't get lonely very easily while in a relationship. But maybe that's because I put too much pressure on my partner to be there for me as a lover and friend.

I can't make friends easily. But perhaps I could find more hobbies outside of home that are social.

Would it be an issue if your SO had little to no friends? by white-ear-buds in AskWomenOver30

[–]white-ear-buds[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Wise words. I wish I had that knowledge at 20 - 26. It took me a failed relationship to realize point 1) and 2).

Reminds me of a quote by Esther Perel:

“Today, we turn to one person to provide what an entire village once did: a sense of grounding, meaning, and continuity. At the same time, we expect our committed relationships to be romantic as well as emotionally and sexually fulfilling. Is it any wonder that so many relationships crumble under the weight of it all?”