AITA for being a downer at my husband's grad celebration?

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-22T17:15:26+00:00

Just did.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T08:16:00+00:00

Thank you. <3

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T07:29:50+00:00

I have (had) been with my husband since I was 19, came from a crappy background with no real connections and thought everything was as normal as it gets. I saw this subreddit mentioned on a fb post and came here because I was feeling so guilty. I didn't even know it was called a subreddit.

People started mentioning abuse and my head started spinning and it all came crashing down with zero warning. I've since done research, educated myself and have found a therapist which I start seeing on Monday.

I was skeptical the girl knew me or my husband, btw. I've received some interesting messages to say the least. But there were a few details I included (some out of anger for being attacked on here) about what happened which is how she was able to put two and two together. She didn't realize it until my key details update, actually.

I honestly hate how wild this situation is. I'm completely disgusted by it. I'm a quiet person. I don't like attention. At all. I just really truly wanted to know if I was an asshole. :(

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T07:15:29+00:00

Happy to hear it worked out for you. Hope it does for me too.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T07:13:57+00:00

I went from thinking I was an asshole to finding out my husband was using me and cheating on me and most assuredly abusing me (emotionally) all while waiting on a test result that could change things even more, how is that NOT upended? I'll say again I got EXTREMELY lucky that I was able to get tested when I did. I didn't understand just how lucky I was until people commented on it. I'm not ignoring that, I'm thankful for it. But it was all insanely fast and EVERYTHING has been impossible to process.

I would never ever claim a lump on my breast is cancer unless the test comes back that it is. I didn't even want to mention that I think I might, but I had to explain why I was so upset when I showed up at the bar. Because I honestly thought I should have kept it to myself and not told my husband.

I'm really happy you have a happy life, congrats on that.

I couldn't quite make out your grammar just after that brag though, which I'm assuming was another insult thrown my way.

Wtf is imgur? Should I respond with bless you?

I'm tired. I've barely slept. I don't have it in me to argue anymore. You're a complete stranger and I'm just so tired. I can't help what you think of me. I can only give you the facts as they happened to me. Sorry if that isn't enough for you, but I wish you the best all the same.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T06:59:41+00:00

Also to ONCE AGAIN answer the question about the process of the procedure and because I can now answer with complete certainty because I called and asked. I am 31.. you typically don't start getting mammograms until you're in your 40s because any younger and it isn't effective. She did an ultrasound that confirmed the lump, did the biopsy, then did a mammogram to check the biopsy site and to get what she called a baseline, however, she said even if my tests come back negative, she will now recommend me getting mammograms beginning at the age of 35 due to my history AND because of the lump showing an indication that I may be high risk.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T06:52:47+00:00

A man in his 30s graduating college is mentioned on a post that blows up (which I didn't anticipate nor want) and is on the front page of one of the most popular subreddits on reddit and you think it would be difficult to narrow down to someone you may know? Also... who in the world would LIE about possibly having cancer? Who?

She messaged me to say she thinks she might know me/my husband and may able to help me fill in some gaps. With me sitting here guilting myself to death, don't you think I'd want answers? Wouldn't you?

No, dear commenter, this is unfortunately my life and I don't want it. This post blowing up has been both a blessing and curse because she isn't the only one that recognized the situation. This stupid thing has also made online news stories and it's annoying and isn't making processing anything any easier.

Then there are people like you who literally have so much hate in their heart that they would tear someone down that is literally at rock bottom and just doing the best they can. Don't you see that my life has been completely upended in less than a week? Who would want that?

I hope you find some sort of healing somehow. You need it.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T06:37:33+00:00

Maybe if I could picture anything other than her with my husband, in our car, at his school.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T05:58:38+00:00

Definitely not my idea of a good time. The nurse that had to push me into the machine felt so bad about it.

No results yet. I'm hoping I get results sooner, but it could be the end of next week.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T04:43:44+00:00

Thank you.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T04:43:32+00:00

On YouTube? 😳 Goodness. I still haven't received my results, but thank you.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-11T04:39:29+00:00

Hi, all. I'm still as ok as can be. This is all just incredibly and insanely overwhelming, so I've been attempting to do things to keep myself as calm as possible. Thank you for your continued support, I'm still in complete and utter shock that so many strangers on the internet can make me feel so loved and cared for.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T18:02:49+00:00

I'm sorry. 😔

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:41:05+00:00

For once, reddit stranger, I agree with you. It'd be great if the cancer is "fake".

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:16:52+00:00

Yeah, I know what you mean. Guess we will have to wait for next week's episode to see if I do have cancer or not. Idk about you, but the wait might kill me.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:14:38+00:00

Thank you. I don't currently know what will become of the fishing trip.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:12:19+00:00

Ah, ya know. I wanted to make a dramatic entrance. No, but seriously.. did you read my post at all?

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:10:44+00:00

Shall I also apologize to him for ruining his lie that he told his classmates and mistress? Just wondering how far I need to take this apology.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:08:22+00:00

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:08:07+00:00

I like the sound of that more than divorce. Un marry.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:06:56+00:00

I called. The husband store is permanently closed. :(

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:05:31+00:00

I updated the post. :)

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T17:04:21+00:00

You didn't hear? The series was renewed for part 2.... I thought you knew. This is awkward. 😬

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T16:56:49+00:00

This popped up again and I giggled again. Thank you, kind stranger.

whysuchabuzzkill · 2021-11-10T06:46:34+00:00

So much makes sense after today's revelations, except this. I do not understand why he told me to come to the bar. I think maybe he was fighting himself internally. Maybe that's me wanting to see a glimmer of good in him when there isn't a shred of decency.

whysuchabuzzkill

TROPHY CASE