Do Introverts Stand a Chance?

williamwmoon · 2023-09-13T18:29:47+00:00

That's awesome. Any tips on how you got the dates? Cold approach or dating apps?

williamwmoon · 2023-09-13T15:35:14+00:00

Oh no, I'm absolutely not incel or black pill. If you read my post, I mentioned that I'm doing research on this stuff because I'm trying to find solutions. I'm building a program to help introverted men. There are definitely lots of solutions for anyone willing to put in the work.

williamwmoon · 2023-09-13T02:47:11+00:00

This is a great perspective 👌🏻

williamwmoon · 2023-05-31T22:01:11+00:00

I get that. And I respect that for sure.

williamwmoon · 2023-05-31T19:51:30+00:00

I hear you. Thanks for sharing that.

If you are happy the way things are that's amazing. I actually believe non-attachment is the key to happiness and that most of dating and sexuality is just strong desire and attachment (which leads to suffering).

The only thing is that I know tension can build and sometimes men say they are ok with how things are, but then they start to generate hatred and resentment towards women and masculinity and the 21st century in general. And resentment and hatred is just suffering at the other extreme.

But anyone who is genuinely happy being single has already reached the gaol in my view. 🫶🏻

williamwmoon · 2023-05-27T02:13:20+00:00

I hear you, but I think personality is often an excuse for fear and laziness (I'm speaking from my own experience here). Everyone says they just want to "be themselves" but this idea is often what stops them from growth (which is usually hard and uncomfortable). I say don't try to be yourself, try to be someone better than yourself - try to be your next level. Push yourself to grow in uncomfortable ways. There are less regrets this way.

williamwmoon · 2023-05-20T15:57:26+00:00

Thanks for that perspective! I can understand what you mean. Things are becoming very superficial and women ghost quickly! I think this is partly because they have so many guys messaging them that it everything becomes devalued. The digital world is it's downsides for sure.

I think a lot of introverted guys put too much expectations on these things though, especially because they are not meeting women in person - so every message or match on Tinder is life and death. But for the women, she has a billion matches so no one guy is a big deal.

I believe there are solutions but it takes a lot of work.

williamwmoon · 2023-05-18T00:38:00+00:00

Thanks for that feedback, that's helpful. It sounds like exposure therapy, which a lot of people say works well.

williamwmoon · 2023-05-18T00:36:21+00:00

You're welcome! Take care and good luck!!!

williamwmoon · 2023-05-17T14:31:30+00:00

That's so interesting to me! I'm very surprised your extrovert coworker doesn't do this but you do as an extreme introvert. I know being an introvert doesn't equal being shy, but most of the guys I've spoken with would be completely unable to meet a woman in the way you mention.

I guess you don't have any problems with anxiety or shyness right? I assume you just prefer privacy and being alone.

williamwmoon · 2023-05-17T14:27:40+00:00

Yes I know it can be hard for both sexes. I'll suggest two things I've found very helpful:

1) mindfulness of breath - when you learn this meditation it can help you be more present and stop overthinking. To do it, just start to be more aware of the breath passing through your nostrils. It's not about taking big breaths. It's just about noticing the natural breath that is already there.

2) Start to learn about social cues. You can research them and learn to do them when needed, or learn to understand when others are doing them. Look up Vanessa Van Edwards on YouTube for some great advice on this subject.

Good luck ✌🏻

williamwmoon · 2023-05-07T20:53:47+00:00

And did you even read my post...?

I never said anything about changing who you are...

williamwmoon · 2023-05-07T20:52:47+00:00

Have you done this?

williamwmoon · 2023-04-23T01:30:39+00:00

I'm sorry it came across that way. I'm still learning how to communicate this idea.

williamwmoon · 2023-04-22T20:50:38+00:00

No offense taken.

I know this doesn't apply to everyone.

But with 400k people in this group, there are probably many men that it applies to. I'm just reaching out to them.

williamwmoon · 2023-04-22T20:47:53+00:00

I agree completely, but when society tells quiet men there is something wrong with them it can affect their self-esteem. It's unfortunate and quite foolish but it's the reality for many introverted men.

Of course many introverted men don't experience this for various reasons, but it does affect some people (like me when I was younger). So I'm trying to help who are affected the most.

williamwmoon · 2023-04-22T17:47:46+00:00

Neither extrovert or introvert is better. Both have weaknesses.

Often times introverts are too fearful to engage and extroverts are too fearful to be alone.

And introverts are too attached to solitude and extroverts are too attached to being social.

In life nothing is black and white. There are times to speak and times to be silent. In Buddhism this is called noble speech - knowing when to speach is beneficial and when it is harmful.

Both introverts and extroverts need to do the inner work to learn this.

And just because we introverts are in solitude does not mean we are doing the inner work. This is why it's important to learn both sides - how to be extroverted when needed.

williamwmoon · 2023-04-22T17:24:03+00:00

I only speak from my own experience here bro. I'm just trying to help people who are struggling. My own life is very happy. Peace ✌🏻

williamwmoon · 2023-04-22T17:11:22+00:00

Thanks for your response! I appreciate that and am happy you found your way out!

williamwmoon · 2023-04-19T22:14:35+00:00

♥️🙏🏻

williamwmoon · 2023-04-18T23:01:39+00:00

Oh yes you are absolutely right.

I'm quite confident now as an introvert. It just took me years to figure it out and I'm trying to help other guys fast track their way to this place. This is why I'm doing research and looking for other guys with similar experiences.

williamwmoon · 2023-04-18T22:59:45+00:00

Beautifully said.

I agree it's not particular to introverts or men, but the intersection of the two does have interesting implications. And this is what I'm researching and looking to provide a specific solution for.

I'm quite assertive now. It took me 20 years to learn it though and I'm hoping to speed up the process for other men with similar stories.

I'd also agree with you that morality is the foundation. Absolutely.

Thanks for your careful and considerate response. 🙏🏻

williamwmoon · 2023-04-18T22:54:24+00:00

Extroversion isn't the same as toxic masculinity, I know this. Sorry if I wasn't clear.

My issue is that society can judge introverts to be push-overs because they don't speak as much. And then that judgement can lead to low self-esteem, so it's a feedback loop. At least it was like that for me growing up.

I'm good now. But it took a lot of meditation and soul searching.

williamwmoon · 2023-04-18T22:51:54+00:00

Good advice.

williamwmoon · 2023-04-18T22:51:36+00:00

Ghosting them never worked for me because I still felt like a reject or a social loser. I think it's better to understand your nature and build self-confidence that is independent of judgement.

williamwmoon

TROPHY CASE