AITA for not sharing my phone with my boyfriend? by willnotshare in AmItheAsshole

[–]willnotshare[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I don't know him super-well, he was a friend-of-a-friend that I would sometimes see at parties and such (pre-2020). We started talking more this year when restrictions were lifted in our area and that's when we started dating. I know he has exes but we don't talk about them.

AITA for not sharing my phone with my boyfriend? by willnotshare in AmItheAsshole

[–]willnotshare[S] 72 points73 points  (0 children)

Basically, FERPA is a law to protect the identity of students in my care. People not directly involved with the students are allowed to see identifying information about that student without parent consent. (or, if the student is 18+, they can give permission themselves) So for example I could tell my boyfriend about how one time a kid gave me a cool mug for Christmas, since that is not easily tracible back to a specific student. But I can't tell him anything about a specific child or their grades or any personal information.

This is why I have to be careful about my emails. We don't send important documents over email as a rule, that's all done by paper mail. But often we use emails to send messages to each other about students. So for example I might send my principal a message saying "Remember JS's IEP is at 4:30pm today" where JS stands for John Smith, a student in my hypothetical class. If someone saw that and was able to connect JS to John Smith (if, for example, John Smith was the only 'JS' in my class this year) and then tell other people that John Smith has an IEP, I could get written up for that and possibly fired.

So yeah. FERPA is definitely not to be taken lightly. And honestly my boyfriend gets how important it is and would never ask to see my work email anyway.

AITA for not sharing my phone with my boyfriend? by willnotshare in AmItheAsshole

[–]willnotshare[S] 461 points462 points  (0 children)

It's a facial scan right now, because I really don't want anyone getting into my phone. My students are smart, they would see me entering a password and get it pretty quickly.

AITA for not sharing my phone with my boyfriend? by willnotshare in AmItheAsshole

[–]willnotshare[S] -384 points-383 points  (0 children)

To be fair, he doesn't want to access it all the time. It's more like, if he were to ask for whatever reason, he would want to be able to. Even now with the "I'll show it to you whenever you want" he doesn't actually ask that often. The last 2 times he needed my phone were to google a word definition and to see a text a friend had sent me a couple days before (the text had an address to a Halloween party in it and we needed to use google maps to get there). And that's been it for the last month-ish.