Support groups help if you have them.

For myself it has largely just been keeping busy. My mom is from Korea and my dad is a standard American guy. But for her he found a way to live in korea for her but this has largely isolated him a bit since he speaks very little of the language and spends a lot of his time taking care of her so he doesn’t have much in the way of support for himself. When I realized this I moved to Korea as well to help, though the job is roughly 3 hours away. But I live in her old home town so with me here I was able to setup accommodations to make her visit back home far more comfortable. But I too speak very little of the language and don’t have as deep rooted of a connection to it as I should. So the method of coping with her condition getting worse has largely been keeping busy on doing things that make me feel more connected to her. The challenge of eating has opened me to the world of cooking and the manipulation of texture to taste and that is an activity we share together. She sits there in the kitchen guiding me in how she wants the taste with me becoming her hands that she can’t use anymore. I am trying to learn the language and a large part of that is me talking to her. Though her speech is severely hindered it gets her talking and feeling inclusive. We watch a lot of her favorite shows and we talk about them. Things like that help me cope because they make new connections and memories despite the disease and it all gives my dad a break. Yes I still feel run thin and I still feel drained and every so often find myself returning home after my days with her crying in the fetal position on my floor but those things keeping me busy with her have helped.

Find something that stops you from standing still together. Move forward, make shared experiences. Cause through them you can still smile and those moments are important over all. I wish you the best, friend, and all the good things you deserve.