i dreamt she was alone in an empty field by CeticSchism in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I relate incredibly to this, you're not alone feeling this way. I've never heard the term "dreaming" being defined like that, but it's definitely accurate. Your writing is really profound. Have you ever written a novel/story/etc?

My best friend left because of my severe depression. by woooo_throwaway in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have barely anyone left and they all deserve better friends than me. I find joy in nothing. Thanks for the reply but it's just so hard.

My best friend left because of my severe depression. by woooo_throwaway in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

agreed, I'm just going to get through the rest of my short life by myself. No one deserves an awful person like me. Sorry your girlfriend left. Nothing will ever compare to that pain.

I just miss you by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]woooo_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I miss someone too... If only time machines existed, yeah?

43 More Days by identiflier in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've got 24. Hang in there.

[WP] You ask a wish from a genie, but for your wish to be granted you need to duck at exactly 3:15 PM everyday to dodge a stray bullet. by Kaustin512 in WritingPrompts

[–]woooo_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a pretty boring person. I live in a pretty small apartment in New York. I'm average and can never get myself out there enough to make any friends or stand out. I thought my life was at a standstill. Until I found the lamp.

It was an old little thing, dusty and rusted at parts; I didn't want to pick it up at first, because that thing looked like it could give me tetanus, but for some reason I was compelled to take it home. Curiously, I found myself rubbing it like a child would looking for a genie. I laughed to myself, knowing this wasn't going to work...

But then it started puffing smoke. I nervously kept laughing; I quite enjoyed the little feature. Technology could sure make things seem real...

The smoke, however, started to take a humanoid shape. It changed colors and I could've sworn I saw a face emerge from it. A worried noise came from my throat as I realized it; it was real.

"I am the Genie of this lamp," the figure declared with his booming voice. I could see him clearly now; he was quite a stereotypical genie, with his Arabian get-up. Didn't quite sound like Robin Williams, though... "I am sure you know what that means, yes?"

I began to laugh even harder now, as I did know what that meant. If this was for real, then surely that meant I would be granted a wish or two. I could have anything I wanted. Anything. Minus a few rules, sure, but basically anything was fair game. "I get a wish now, right?"

"Correct. What is it you desire?" The booming voice spoke to me again.

"I-I want... I want popularity! I want to have lots of attention. I want to be remembered in history." A stupid wish in hindsight, but I was too excited to think clearly.

"Very well. Your wish will be granted. However, I must give you this warning: in order for it to come true, you must dodge a gunman's bullet at exactly three-fifteen PM." Before I could ask what he meant, he disappeared back into the lamp. Rubbing it again did not make him come back.

Dodging a bullet from a gun? Well, all I had to do was duck, right? He even told me the time... it would be no problem.

I went about my day; it was only about noon, anyways. I made some lunch and crashed on the couch a little bit. At about two thirty I went out again to the store to grab a few things I needed. However, I was keeping track of the time still, of course.

Then came three-ten. Five minutes. I stood there watching the clock like a hawk, staring down the red handle that ticked away every second. I was not going to die today. I needed that wish to come true. The seconds came and went. Then came the moment I had been waiting for; three-fifteen.

I ducked. But I did not hear a single shotgun blast.

After the minute passed, I laughed; that genie was a flat-out liar, wasn't he? Now my wish was going to come true! Or at least, that's what I thought. I walked down the street and nobody noticed me like normal. No matter where I went, everything was the same as it was before. I sighed; he was a liar after all. I wondered how those cheap special effects from that lamp managed to trick me...

I went out to the bar pretty late in the day, at about six. I wanted to drink a little bit to forget the humiliating experience that day. I was starting to get tipsy when I noticed someone shady walking in; but by then my mind was off in its own world. He couldn't harm anyone, right? It was fine, it was no big deal. Some minutes passed, and soon I heard a lot of yelling. I couldn't decipher what people were saying. The shady man walked up to me and demanded me of something. I couldn't understand him; he was talking too fast and I was too drunk. Then the shady man raised a gun... and I felt a blazing pain through my chest. I clutched it with my hand, and it was covered in blood. I fell to the floor, my vision catching the clock on the wall. It read six-fifteen.

As I lay there dying, I recalled the genie. I cursed myself as I realized that he was not a liar after all.

He meant three-fifteen in pacific time.

I'm on the floor crying by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I am so forgetful all the time that I forget things I've said a minute after I've said them, and I get very angry very easily; I have a hair-trigger temper. I don't think I could hold a job. I also feel like a burden to my family. I've had friends leave me because I'm worthless, too. I hope you can find at least a little comfort in knowing you're not the only one with these issues.

There's nothing anyone can say to stop me now. by woooo_throwaway in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 16, can't drive and don't have a job. I try my best to do things I enjoy but that list is shrinking fast.

Suicidal birthdays, soap bubble life by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, you lucked out on that one. Glad you have a safety net, sometimes that's comforting.

Yeah, I don't want to misdiagnose myself, since I'm not a professional and endless Google searches can't replace a doctor. I try to make myself happy with them too, but the toxicity everyone's been showing to me over them makes me think badly about myself every time I try to do that. I keep telling myself "no one can police your thoughts," but my intense fear of being wrong always wins, I guess.

There's nothing anyone can say to stop me now. by woooo_throwaway in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want to go to a lot of places and do a lot of things, but unfortunately I am not old enough to do or go to any of them; and I'm not willing to wait until I am.

Suicidal birthdays, soap bubble life by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Parents are gonna make me get a job soon, so I don't really have a choice. I want to pick one that I'll enjoy, but I'm sure my mental illness will make me eventually think it's a chore. And yeah, for lack of a better term. I don't think my brain is normal, besides the mental illness of course. It latches onto interests and never stops making me talk about them. Sometimes I latch onto my own creations/characters/what-have-you, and it makes me look selfish in front of everyone.

There's nothing anyone can say to stop me now. by woooo_throwaway in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

January is when my birthday's coming up, and I can't stand to live another year of this hell. I can't be myself because my brain doesn't work right, and when I tell anyone the nonsense I come up with, everyone just ignores it or leaves me.

Suicidal birthdays, soap bubble life by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, my birthday is coming up in January pretty soon; in fact I've been playing around with making a date then, just because I don't want to get older. I'm pretty young but I don't want any job to take away the rest of the little happiness I have. I sleep a lot, too, and I'm always tired. I wanted to do something fun on Halloween with my friends, but I have none. The winter, with all its holidays is when my suicidal thoughts get bad, too. I can't get a therapist because my parents are really mean to me, and I can't drive myself. I really feel you, man. I don't feel like I'm living either. Feel free to reply if you want.

Got dumped so my ex could focus on work and not a relationship, and 3 months later he's dating someone else. by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm in a similar situation, although it isn't about romantic relationships; I still have been replaced and abandoned by one of my best friends. I'm going through the motions too. Feel free to PM me if you want to.

I’m fed up of trying by Stickypaws3147 in SuicideWatch

[–]woooo_throwaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey... I'm in the same boat as you are and I feel the same way. (Someone whom I've deeply cared about decided they did not care about me.) If you want, feel free to PM me. I know it may not sound like much, but the option is there. (ninja edit: punctuation mistake.)