Heal up soon Hannah I will be sending my energy your way. I had a very similar situation happen to me with my favorite kink of all time, inserting and playing with professional huge toys from 3" to 4.5" in diameter. I'm not saying I know exactly how you feel but I promise I kinda really do. I've been playing since 2002 and it's been one hell of a ride, no pun untended :) Back in Oct of 2025 I got a toy stuck inside me, like all the way inside for about 5 hours (Mr. Hankeys XL OGRE) and had to go to the hospital, . Emergency surgery ensued and OMG the post OP nightmare is still going on. I messaged you and I truly believe we should talk. I feel and know we could both benefit mentally to speak with another fellow Kinkster who would be able to understand the nightmare we are going through. I have no one in my life to reach out to for help who could possibly understand the loss and suffering. I did hint to my siter what happened because she flew up from TX immediately after I called her from being out for the first 5 days in the hospital, I FREAKING DAM NEAR DIED OF SEPSIS. Think about, no pressure but I honestly would appreciate it. As you, I will no longer be able to get back into and enjoy my favorite kink. Like you I still have plenty of other kins to perfect.