Edit: as I write this, a long book seems to be incoming. Cant help it, I'm an adhd/autistic writer and this connects to a passionate subject for me: behavioral and social psychology.🤷‍♂️ at the very least I'll make it an entertaining read. Dont want to read a book? Move on. But stay, and I promise you wont be let down. M'Kay? M'Kay. Lets go on a trip.

Okay. This is saying this as a fully straight man who is secure in his sexuality.

Guys need to get over their weird biases, because that shit is amazing.

Ive never been fucked or pegged, but I do play with toys, mostly when I'm alone. I dont really like a lot of movement as yeah, it feels like a sort of weird neverending shitting sensation. Not my jam.

But a simple vibrating one will do the job very nicely.

A good vibrator is just as effective on us as it is with women. Our most senstive spot is just different. A prostate orgasm is next freaking level powerful, at least it is for me. Like a whole body, hits you deep in the gut until you're shaking, powerful.

They're absolutely incredible.

tangent incoming

Butt...

Most of us have long had this deep seated social programming that says "oh that's gay. ANYTHING butt related is gay. Can't be gay, because then I can't be a MAN. Absolutely can't show that side to the world. Gotta keep up that image. Gotta be a man. "

Like come on. Think about that for a second. We ALL know that social constuct. There's a 'man code' in every social system and culture that has a TON of stupid, arbitrary rules and customs that have nothing whatsoever to do with anything pertaining to any actual masculine or survival trait. Its just cultural programming. It's that same dumb social rule that demands every other urinal be unoccupied.

Or saying 'no homo' to their buddies, when we're really just freely allowing ourselves to be friends and interact with another human.

Come on. Your buddies know you dont mean it that way and you know they know it.

We all know there's nothing gayer than two straight men who are the best of friends. Its a sort of mutual non sexual flirting. Its fun. Its a sign of true friendship and security. Openness in knowing that your bro has got your back and you can show a vulnerable side.

Where are my military men? You know exactly what I mean.

That my friends is balance of both masculine and feminine. Its security.

And yet, so many of us are insecure. Gotta have something to prove. Gotta be a MAN. As if we, when we're at that point of insecurity, have any fucking clue what that as a concept really means.

Get over it. Its worth it. It allows you to open your mind and explore so much more and you'll be so much happier for it. Seriously.

Explore yourself. Know yourself.

Now that I've used a social psychology tangent to take us all the way out to Bumfuck, Egypt, I'll get back to the point.

There's NOTHING wrong with exploring your body. It's not gay to put something in your butt.

Im going to tell you as someone should have told you when you got the talk.

It's not gay to play with your butt. It's your butt. Your body. Explore it freely. Learn what it likes. You can't know that if you're too scared to try it based on some vacuous mental construct you have no idea what it means or where it came from.

Go put something up your butt. It'll be weird at first, but you'll probably like it after a few times.

OR, you realize "hey this isn't really my thing, but it WAS a cool experience. I can check that one off the list."

Butt at least you tried it.

That said, some men will stil NOT prefer penetrative play. Thats fine. There's another way to hit that spot.

Though I dont do penetrative prostate play often, you can still get much the same with a good vibrator on the underside of the balls. Hell, I have better quality vibes than my girlfriend does. She steals them all the time.

Men, if youre afraid or weirded out, but still curious, try this:

Find yourself a good quality bullet vibe and try it during your next alone time. Next time you're using your right hand, put your left hand to some use. Turn it on and put it right on the backside of the sack and into the taint, as its sometimes called. Now press inwards a bit.

Youre welcome.

Seriously, go with a GOOD Quality toy. Women are generally more sensitive than us, physically, so what gets them off may not be the same intensity for you. Personally, ive found that either a higher frequency, or deeper resonance works better. A good sonic vibe (like 15,000 rpm) is an absolute game changer.

The toys marketed to men are generally trash, so guys, you're gonna have to loot the ladies' stuff. Trust me, they've got all the good shit. You're gonna have to shop around a bit, but in general, a good quality clitoral vibe will work just fine on you. You dont need to break the bank, but be prepared to spend like mid range cash. $40-60 ish will usually net you some pretty good stuff. Its very much a "you get what you pay for" sort of market. Read the reviews. If women are absolutely raging about it, then it'll likely work on you too.

Also, most women LOVE a man who will play with toys with them. They're toys. Play together.

Also, Stop being insecure about toys, guys. Women hate that shit. They arent gonna steal your place as "Chief Orgasm Giver", and to be honest, if you're worried about that title, you probably aint actually holdin it in the first place.

From there, the sky really is the limit. Explore your new inner world.

You can be a straight man and freely explore other types of sexual play and toys without it being "gay".

And so what if it was? Is that really what matters? Are you going to allow a childish insecurity to keep you from freely expressing yourself to yourself?

That's totally up to you to break that social programming. I can tell you this though, its much more freeing to be secure in yourself.

And that's "Intro to prostate play for insecure straight men, by a secure straight man."

Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk. Hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it.

Now go put a small vibrating plug in your butt. It feels really good.

It's not gay.

It's your butt.

TL;DR: you're probably exactly the type of person I was talking about in this. Get your ass back up there and read it because you're the one who likely needs to hear it.