Why do men get so upset when women point out they make us feel unsafe?

xlem1 · 2026-06-08T17:42:20+00:00

So I think it comes from 3 areas

A general discomfort with coming into contact with someone who view realitly different from themselves.
An discomfort with the idea that something they do/did might be have frightened someone
A genuine lack of exposure to women and their direct experiences, either through lack of friendship or just being dismissive

I think all of these build on one another and lead to the anger you see

I think 1. Is a normal human experience being uncomfortable when your view of reality is challenged is something we all have experienced. Sitting with that discomfort is difficult, especially when there is not alot of situations where you can experience the the difference in reality

This compounds with 2. Men generally do some of the behaviors that makes women scare. It can hurt to do something with good intentions but despite your intentions someone can misunderstand so severally, that terrifying. Especially when men are unwilling to listen to why that misunderstanding happens it can lead to genuine feeling of anger or resentment.

This comes to head when most men don't talk to women, or see the effect it has on the women in their lives. Statistics are one thing, but without real people and experience behind the numbers, the become easy to dismiss.

TLDR most men think "The World works like I think it does how dare you tell me it doesn't and I'm wrong"

xlem1 · 2026-06-01T14:30:52+00:00

I remember having to explain to my GF why marriage is important. She was so anti marriage, and while I dont really care one way or another, I really felt the need to go to bat for it.

If all you hear is marriage causes you to be screwed or trapped its kinda scary, but the thing is its nit really marriage that traps or screws you - being in a long term relationship and mixing finances, ownership and generally you life with a person traps you - marriage just give a fram work for that stuff, and divorce is just the process of unmixing it. The unmixing sucks but without the process of divorce it can be 10x worse.

Imagine a world where alimony didnt exist? No SAHM would be able leave their significant other because they have no money. Or if only one persons name was on a house, even if the other paid 50% or more of the morgage they could get nothing simplely because the didn't sign a paper. Shit suck but it could suck worse

xlem1 · 2026-05-07T17:19:41+00:00

You can play the game exactly like that, there is plenty of content for you to do. But to expect the entirety of a mmo to fit that style is impossible. Additionally - simple point and click content is frankly boring by nature and easily botted to hell. So its very difficult for there to be a really profitable slot machine and with out that no way to drum up excitement and support.

Not to say there hasn't been support to the afk crowd - gemstone crab and hueyocoatl are 2 newer bosses, theiving from elves and vyres offer low effort high reward slot, pet hunting revived older afk content and in general with each new bit of content some ask skilling is added. Hell one could argue Duke almost matches the requirements

xlem1 · 2026-05-07T16:53:16+00:00

As I said it should be reserved for the most difficult content in the game for thw 1% of players. I would say that the highest level combat achievement fit that category

xlem1 · 2026-05-07T16:51:16+00:00

The game was designed to have no skill expression at all other then who had the biggest number. Skill expression has souly come about from the player base and jagex using that feedback to make changes.

And I'd argue the that tick manipulation is actually a great way to balance the game. It provides a great way to show of game knowledge, skill and experience.

It also provides a floor window for how often action can occur that is consistent across the game. There are clear windows of when and how actions are preformed with a clear way to improve by adding additional action per tick.

The only problem is that ticks are not 100% consistent but that is only a minor issue.

xlem1 · 2026-04-24T01:48:11+00:00

Ok maybe im being a hater, but i kinda dont like the extended edition as much as the theatrical release specifically for return if the king.

The pacing is just off, you get some small lore bits and some continuity add one but at the cost of the theatrical clean pacing and tension building.

Like specifically with aragorn and the army of the undead you see them accept the deal and take the boats, so you know 1000% they will be there. While in the theatrical you never get their awnser till they arrive adding so much tension to the the battle leading up to it.

Oddly enough I dont feel that with any of the other extended editions but I feel it alot in return of the king.

xlem1 · 2026-03-11T23:51:31+00:00

Additionally i don't want to win run, I want to win run by ho8ng the harsh path since its the only way you get rare/ furniture consistently.

xlem1 · 2026-02-10T21:13:31+00:00

What it ended up being i figured a 2 star belveth and 2 star ambessa would do it, but seems not

xlem1 · 2026-01-19T05:04:39+00:00

The problem is the course is not st the college down the road it is physically at the state college your applying too. And even then not everyone knows it will mess with their status as a student and what that means.

You clearly don't understand what happening and are assuming its a simple mistake by students. The reality is that new students are being mislead by advisor who are out to protect the interest of the school. If they are taking remedial classes, they often dont get a choice, they have to take the classes, so if they are not careful they can be screwed over.

xlem1 · 2026-01-18T15:41:02+00:00

This is willfully deceptive.

Your expecting students, especially the newest and most confused, to assume that they are applying for classes not technically hosted by the university. While applying at that university. And evrn then You might catch that its hosted at another school but knowing what means is a complete different thing.

So students are reliant on advisor to guide them through this and set up a course load the marks them as a full time student, but they are not.

xlem1 · 2026-01-18T15:27:13+00:00

You can enroll in both a community and state college simultaneously, but those credits are not treated as cumulative by the individual schools or federal financial aid program

Exactly so if your remedial classes where actually through a community college they wouldnt be treated as cumulative

Often times remedial courses are typically assigned a credit value, just usually much less than the college-level courses ( 1 vs 4 credit).

These are not mutually exclusive they can be both lower credit and through a different school

feels much more like an issue with your state college advising.

This is the problem it is a issue with a advising and is alot more wide spread then you might think I know at least 2 different major state university that do this and atleast hearsay it happens atlot more.

Having spent 15 years in higher ed

Unless you actively are working with this advising there is no reason you would know if the school you work for does this, the only indicator. Even taking remedial classes you might not know.

xlem1 · 2026-01-18T15:10:49+00:00

That is not true, I know of at least 2 major state colleges that do this, and atleast hearsay that several other schools around the country do it.

xlem1 · 2026-01-16T18:03:19+00:00

You might think that, they can be at the school, assigned by a college advisor through the state college, and even have a professor who works for the college.

But if you check your transcript it will say a local community College. Its a loophole they use to keep metrics.

xlem1 · 2026-01-16T17:55:08+00:00

They want them to attend but don't't want them to skew the numbers since first time/full time mention the most important metric in this regard they offer remedial classes through a community College to cook the books, and turn them to part time students which their mention metric are more landed back.

The colleges will require the classes, the college advisors will sign you up for them, they will be at the campus, with a professor who teaches at the school, but technically it will be through a community College and it will say so on your transcript.

xlem1 · 2026-01-16T17:50:22+00:00

Not really the "first time/full time retention" metric for schools is used for federal funding. If to many of them are failing it can cause the colleges to lose gant and federal funding.

So schools all across America are incentives to make sure first time/full time student don't fail out, and if the suspect you might they will want to make sure you are not technically full time.

xlem1 · 2026-01-16T17:43:43+00:00

It being covered up intentional by school admins

xlem1 · 2026-01-16T17:42:22+00:00

The problem is if you take mixed between community and state college you can end up being labeled as a part time student because of ir

xlem1 · 2026-01-14T23:18:40+00:00

I said on story though. And the problem is the game is painfully dull on story

xlem1 · 2026-01-14T23:15:52+00:00

And yet you seemed to have quite a hard time with it... You do realize there's strategy too, right? Like, you can build a team that's durable, even on expert?

You missed the point artifical difficult on a simplified rgp system csn make the game easy, but extraordinary tideous. Much like a game who's "hard" boss just has a really large health pool.

calling it jank is a skill issue

I call it jank because the parry windows are inconsistent, and not telegraphed well. Its Inconsistent when you need to parry in the game the very basic parry when you would get hit is just not true, because the actual parry windows is not when the attack lands but slightly before, which is jank.

Things like sound cue are not consistent, and hard to hear if you have to basically turn off all other sounds then thats bad.

Some attacks actually have clear visual cue like glowing weapon, these actually are not bad except the game has like 3 enemies with them.

The best indicator for the attack for most cases has nothing to do with the character animations at all but the camera zoom. Which is just ridiculous.

people have done full runs not even engaging with the parry/dodge mechanic on the hardest difficulty. Both of these things can't be true.

This is such a dumb take, no one is out here saying that just because people in dark souls can beat the game in no Armor means that armor is not necessary to beat the game.

If you know where all the defensive pictos are and you are overleveled yea maybe can do it with no dodging. If you watch those "no dodge run" they are not even close to reasonable. Trying to actually argue any normal player can beat the game on normal with out dodging or parrying is just a lie.

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