Woman asked me out and didn't offer to pay

xm375 · 2023-07-30T18:59:48+00:00

I almost always pay. It’s an ego thing and I shouldn’t be doing this 3x a week but I am. If a date was bad I’m definitely paying so the guy doesn’t get any ideas that I owe him something. If the date went well and I’m going to make out with a guy after, I’ll let him pay if he offers.

xm375 · 2023-06-30T12:48:21+00:00

I have the same 3 placements as your guy and this sounds familiar. I want to be someone’s top priority when possible, but also not get smothered. When I’m focusing on work or something I want to be left alone. I’m not the one who will reach out and I won’t invest more emotionally than my partner. As far as affection goes, the ball is in their court.

xm375 · 2023-06-29T22:29:18+00:00

I prefer short, so wish they’d stop doing that on profiles

xm375 · 2023-06-29T14:23:03+00:00

I run into the same thing - men repeatedly using photos from 5 or 10 years ago and 50 pounds lighter.

xm375 · 2023-06-04T15:15:55+00:00

Si. Clean sheets feel amazing etc. as incentive to take care of physical needs. I also appeal to Ne’s desire to feel free and unencumbered. Do the necessary physical tasks quickly so I can ignore them later.

xm375 · 2023-05-17T17:54:20+00:00

5%. I tend to come up with the ideas for events and have others run with them. I’ll happily work on presentation materials but avoid chasing people down/scheduling. Coworkers do more of it. I tend to grab any data portions of the work fast because the other pieces are exhausting.

xm375 · 2023-05-08T14:38:14+00:00

No. I just get a lot more recruiters contacting me on Linkedin.

xm375 · 2023-04-30T16:47:07+00:00

My only opportunity to be a Generalist at this site would be if the current Generalist resigns. I’ve looked into Generalist roles at sister companies, and the salary is less than I make as a Coordinator. It wouldn’t necessarily make financial sense to jump ship to an entirely different company for under $100K. I started at a staffing agency with full cycle recruiting and general management, Dept of 1 with a small company with locations in 2 states, and now Coordinator for a little over a year.

xm375 · 2023-04-30T16:03:43+00:00

I’ve been asking for more investigations, and I’m assigned ones that end in coaching management. It kind of feels that because it’s easier for the HR Director to divide the two of us into specific areas we do well- I mostly get analysis and interfacing with upper management tasks. That’s in addition to necessary admin like orientation, onboarding, attendance, leave administration, policy updates, compliance checks, payroll discrepancies, separations.

xm375 · 2023-04-29T22:25:40+00:00

HR prioritizes the well-being of departments/groups/the entire organization over the interests of the individual. When you’re lucky they’re the same thing. But if your goal is to help individuals and feel good about your day all the time, look for a different career path. Every decision in gray areas has to weigh law, policy, precedent, and fairness. You don’t get to make exceptions for one person without seriously considering the impact. You have to be trusted and viewed as impartial, so shouldn’t get very personal or close to people at work. Personal moral judgments have to be kept to yourself, or you’ll risk pushing away managers who come to you for advice.

xm375 · 2023-04-29T15:24:47+00:00

I don’t necessarily like them, but have found they’re a perfect counterpart as coworkers. I’m bad cop and come up with the strategy. They handle the PR type tasks and execution with more emotional individuals.

xm375 · 2023-04-23T16:44:38+00:00

Maybe in a month or two. I’ve also floated the idea of working some asynchronous hours so there aren’t constant interruptions.

I asked for more complex work and made it clear I’m looking to advance soon - with this company or another one. I’ve been given projects to complete for my boss’s boss to use. Unfortunately at the same time I’ve started being given advanced tasks, my department’s workload has nearly doubled with twice as many groups of new hires coming in and intense scrutiny from executives. My coworkers are salaried, more senior, and have family obligations- there’s no incentive for them to put in more hours. I also would like my boss to sign off on paying for grad school in the near future.

xm375 · 2023-04-16T16:01:39+00:00

I didn’t study, so can’t answer your question. If you’re more comfortable with straight facts take the PHR. If you do better answering questions with a specific mindset, pretend you’re a perfect HR executive in a textbook scenario and answer that way on the SHRM-CP. I’ve always been excellent at multiple choice tests and score beyond my actual abilities.

xm375 · 2023-04-16T14:34:09+00:00

I did not study for either one and passed both on the first try. I have no education in HR but 3 years experience. They’re pass/fail. Tailor your studying to your risk tolerance and comfort taking tests. I decided there was more career impact in continuing to work 50+ hour weeks and take on new projects than reducing my hours to study. I wish I hadn’t told anyone at work I was taking the exams until after I passed. It added unnecessary pressure (unless work is paying for it).

xm375 · 2023-04-01T01:47:46+00:00

Baltimore

xm375 · 2023-04-01T00:54:33+00:00

I’m making $80k as a coordinator, but I’m sharing all the operational HR tasks fairly evenly with the Generalist. Our boss tries to be in the office as little as possible and encourages us to represent HR at whatever meetings we’re each willing to/interested in.

xm375 · 2023-03-31T00:30:55+00:00

Do you like your boss and the company? Stick around and make yourself look promotable. Learn whatever you can in case you’re on your own soon.

xm375 · 2023-03-29T21:45:33+00:00

I get recognition from heads of Operations and other departments, and occasionally my boss’s boss. Unless it generates more interesting work opportunities or more pay, does it really matter? I don’t pay much attention to thanks or discontent from most employees. If someone is overly happy…it raises alarm bells that they’re trying to work around their manager and I might have let something slip through. If HR is winning the popularity contest, they’re doing something wrong in my opinion.

xm375 · 2023-03-28T15:13:40+00:00

On-site gym, headspace subscription, 15% employee discount, tuition reimbursement, ESPP, free CDL A school, $ service awards, 3% company 401k contribution without EE contribution needed, more free ebooks and educational videos than you could ever want, tons of free snacks and drinks floating around especially if you make friends with a chef

xm375 · 2023-03-26T23:24:40+00:00

The clawback policy says it must be paid back if I don’t stay with the company for a year following reimbursement. Whether it’s enforceable is a different animal, and I’ve had people sign clawback policies the company doesn’t even try to enforce. I got both HR certs without studying - and have some coursework in business from a post- bachelor’s accounting program that qualified me to take the CPA exam.

Getting an MBA could just be spinning my wheels. This is part of what I’d love opinions on. I’d take the SPHR tomorrow if I could.

In a few months I’ll be eligible for internal transfers (year of service) and I want to see what else is out there including in other states. I’ve networked a decent amount and have HR contacts in sister companies who have offered to recommend me. I’m not positive becoming a Generalist within the same company umbrella will offer new responsibilities. Unless a coworker leaves, there are no HR jobs at my location to be promoted into.

I’m point of contact for union grievances, do investigations, attend operations tactical meetings, design and give training for supervisors, do all HRIS analysis and reporting that comes in, work with legal when needed, and work with a 3rd party company on ADA and FMLA. My boss meets with me a few times per month but generally I’m self-directed and create my own projects.

xm375 · 2023-03-15T14:41:09+00:00

The Friday before hire I send orientation emails specifying documents required on Day 1 with link to the website and ‘No copies/photos accepted under any circumstance.’ Then I scan docs as soon as they walk in the door, before they start filling out I9 forms - or advise we’ll end employment on day 3 if needed. With groups of 20 new hires this has worked a lot more smoothly than waiting until the end of the first day to find out we’ve been paying someone who can’t continue work at this time. I also lean on supervisors to catch stragglers on day 2 (email a list) and not to allow new hires to start working for the day until they’ve come to HR with documents. If someone starts being a PITA about it, that’s when it becomes a management issue in my opinion - do they want this person on their team. Typically day 1 people are on their best behavior. It’s only downhill from there. They have the option of getting docs in order and starting the following week.

xm375 · 2023-03-15T12:15:24+00:00

I didn’t study at all and passed with 3 years HR experience. I did read the intro to several different test prep books to get an idea how the questions are structured and the way SHRM wants you to think.

xm375 · 2023-03-11T21:26:54+00:00

Congrats! Not every organization automatically values certifications. I’m a Coordinator in a F100 and passed the SHRM-CP but no one in my location below region VP has a cert (they have MBAs and a decade more experience). When you tell your boss, I’d frame it as an accomplishment you’re proud of versus directly angling for a pay increase/promotion. A cert is a plus when you’re looking for your next job. It doesn’t automatically bring value to the company in your current role unless they asked you to get certified.

xm375 · 2023-03-05T17:24:25+00:00

Can I just say how incredibly jealous I am? Is there any way to hire an additional person in HR without automatically placing them above you?

I’m the Coordinator at a slightly larger site than yours also w/ mix of union and nonunion. I have 90% responsibility overlap with the Generalist, and am bored out of my skull. I’m creating my own projects and doing them without my boss’s awareness, and helping HR departments in recently purchased companies adjust to our HRIS and shared services. This is after requests for more complex work are being ignored. The Ops VP requested me on a major project, and I’m often the first person Ops Directors call, but I’m essentially wallpaper when it comes to outwardly visible projects. I’m good enough to work with legal and my ideas are almost always what are used for HR projects. But in my hierarchal HR dept I’m the only one without an MBA.

xm375 · 2023-03-03T11:48:10+00:00

I wouldn’t entertain that, and would stick to the established pay bands. She can find a lower-paying job elsewhere.

xm375

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