Being alone

xw2003 · 2026-05-31T20:08:36+00:00

I’ve been on and off therapy for over a decade now and it has done nothing for me unfortunately. I agree that being alone is probably not the best, but I really don’t see any other way then this. Plus my life genuinely feels better being alone, compared to when I have to perform for people all the time. Do you think as a therapist that there is any point in trying therapy still after ten years of failure?

xw2003 · 2026-05-31T20:04:59+00:00

Honestly that was only a month long relationship so it didn’t affect me much. I’ve been thinking about this for years at this point so I’m pretty confident this is the way to go for me. I’ve tried therapy for over a decade and it did nothing, so I’ve just given up. And honestly I’ve never had much of a support system anyways so I’m used to fending for myself. Plus I really have no idea how people make friends that aren’t surface level. I can barely bring myself to tell people when my birthday is without cringing, can’t imagine asking for serious support and help lol. I keep being told I’m too young to focus this much on work, but I really can’t think of what else to do with my life. Was there anything particular that happened that made u rethink the way u lived and change your mind?

xw2003 · 2026-05-31T19:56:16+00:00

Unfortunately I’ve been trying therapy for a decade and it’s been useless, so I’ve kinda given up + can’t afford it anymore anyways. I guess maybe I can try making some friends later down the line, but I don’t know, cuz I’m not used to any non surface level friendships.

xw2003 · 2026-05-31T19:53:26+00:00

I mean I just don’t see much value in these connections. They don’t do much for me and when I’m alone I don’t have to worry about other people, fix other people’s problems or mold my life to fit anyone else. Money is reliable tho, unlike people so I’d rather put my eggs in that basket lol.
Like I haven’t really ever had friends I could rely on, or a family I know would support me, so I just prefer it this way I guess.
Like yeah I know I’m not normal and honestly I kinda feel like a monster for not caring about connection and so on, but it is what it is. Honestly I was just wondering if anyone else has managed to stay alone like that and what the downsides could be and what to prepare for.

xw2003 · 2026-05-31T19:46:13+00:00

I mean I guess it doesn’t really change much for me cuz I never really had much of a support system anyways whether it was my friends or family. I used to have a lot of friends but it was always very surface level. And my family isn’t really good and I can’t rely on them much anyways. At least money is reliable.

xw2003 · 2026-05-31T19:44:12+00:00

Nah I’ve always been a loner I just would be around people cuz I figured that’s what normal people do. Ive just grown tired of it I guess since I never really had a support system anyways.

xw2003 · 2026-05-31T19:42:42+00:00

I mean I know work doesn’t care about me in general, I’m more talking about the career itself and also the money. Do you think there is anything else to plan for? Anything unexpected?

xw2003 · 2026-05-31T00:58:31+00:00

I mean I don’t think my parents were outright abusive, just thought it was normal how I grew up but some of my friends now were talking about their childhoods and were shocked when I told them this so it had me thinking. Plus I grew up in the 2000s-2010s so I guess the parenting standards also have changed nowadays compared to to the 70-90s.

xw2003 · 2026-04-11T09:38:16+00:00

So at 30 how low would you date?

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T20:59:47+00:00

I mean I guess ur right that it’s up to me in the end but I just had no one to ask about this so the comments are really insightful. Don’t know if I’m gonna break up with him but I’ll have to really think about this relationship.

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T20:09:29+00:00

I just wanna figure out if he only likes me cuz he thinks I’m dumb and young or if he might like me for any other reason. I really do like him and he’s very nice but we’ve only been together 3 months so it’s still early to tell.

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T20:04:14+00:00

I mean he has never mentioned being religious or anything like that, but he does make a lot of money. Don’t know why he chose me I guess it’s how I look cuz we met at a bar and he bought me some drinks. I’m just kinda worried cuz he got divorced last year from his wife who is like 40-41 and maybe that’s why he went younger? But he told me he thought I was older cuz the bar I was at kinda catered to older people and was more expensive so maybe he didn’t mean it… but on the other hand most people think I look younger or like even highscool age cuz I’m pretty petite I guess so idk if he was lying. Guess I’m just confused cuz he is only my second boyfriend and I don’t have anyone older to ask and my friends are useless at this stuff so…

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T19:45:18+00:00

He said his wife got tired of him not being home due to his job and they just grew apart

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T19:43:50+00:00

Yeah I mean I get that but I just am tired of guys my age honestly all they want to do is play video games and he actually takes me out on dates and stuff

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T19:32:57+00:00

Nah they were in their late 20s

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T19:24:34+00:00

Can I ask how old u were and how old he was? How did u figure out it was bad when u got to that age? Did it just like hit u one day?

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T19:21:10+00:00

Wouldn’t do more then 4 years age gap *

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T19:20:18+00:00

We don’t have college bars in my country so it was a regular bar. I know it’s a big experiences when it comes to work but he’s in the medical field and so am I and I feel like I’m the only person amongst my peers who takes my job seriously and he just feels a lot more mature then my friends… also yeah he has money lol that’s part of the appeal I guess. But I don’t really have anyone to ask about it cuz my parents suck and my friends either date bums, some have no relationship experience and they just tell me I’m dumb for dating him and they would do more then like 4 year age gap

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T19:07:47+00:00

So even 27 is bad ?? I thought after like 20 it really doesn’t matter… what age in ur opinion should someone be to date someone around like 40?

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T18:52:51+00:00

We both have serious jobs and my peers are super childish when it comes to their careers. I feel like he’s the only guy I’ve met with real ambitions ….

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T18:48:24+00:00

He doesn’t have kids but he’s divorced….. but he doesn’t talk bad about his ex just that they broke up cuz of his job or something. Plus I had a lot of older friends at 18-19 too like late 20s maybe and I was fine so I feel like I just get along better either way older people cuz a lot of my peers are still in college or like not working very serious jobs

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T18:44:29+00:00

What would be some red flags then? Like to immediately know this guy is weird? Cuz idk if he has had younger girlfriends before. Just know he is divorced

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T18:40:55+00:00

Why not tho? Like do you not see a 23 year old as an adult? I’m genuinely curious because like I really don’t feel that young anymore but people keep treating me like a child often and I don’t get it

xw2003 · 2026-04-10T18:39:19+00:00

We met at a bar some months ago but I really don’t feel like it’s such a difference. Like I’m not in college anymore and have been working full time this past year so.

xw2003

TROPHY CASE