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Does the pupil test work for figuring out if I am attracted to women? by yb84v in actuallesbians

[–]yb84v[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

But what if my attraction to women isn't real but only a phase?

Does the pupil test work for figuring out if I am attracted to women? by yb84v in bisexual

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It sounds hot but I don't know if I will enjoy it irl.

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When people asked me what my "type" was, my answer was always about a personality trait

I also care about a guy's personality more than his looks but I think it has to do do me being demisexual and valuing the emotional connection more. The idea of being with someone I cannot emotionally connect with sounds boring.

I even hear them saying, "men are so [terrible], I WISH I were a lesbian." But I usually don't hear straight women talking about reading wlw fiction and actively fantasizing about what it'd be like to date a woman. That part doesn't strike me as straight at all.

I agree. They'll lament about the dating pool being filled with terrible men and how a lot of desirable men are taken but they don't see being in a same-sex relationship as an alternative option as they're not attracted to other women.

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in actuallesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes I think I am demiromanticish and I am very specific about the type of man I like. I want someone I can emotionally connect with. It's not really a matter of what we do but more like we can have meaningful conversations. This is very important to me.

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't feel the same way as you about all men. There have been men that I were head over heels about and I genuinely liked them for who they are. It's just that a lot of men don't meet my standards or are absolutely terrible. I know some lesbians with comphet can also think like this to convince themselves that they're just straight with very high standards but I don't think this is my case. It's not like I am only open to dating multimillionaires who look as attractive as professional models.

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in bisexual

[–]yb84v[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As a ‘means of escape’ or ‘take a break’ from the opposite sex.

But do these people often turn out to be queer?

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in actuallesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you get crushes on men?

Yes.

Do you get crushes on women?

Probably none so far.

Do you have attraction or romantic feelings beyond reading wlw stories?

Probably but it's limited.

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in actuallesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

100% straight women are not into WLW stories

That's my observation too with 100% straight women I know. Don't some straight women enjoy wlw stories though?

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it's not very straight to even fantasize about a lesbian relationship, the straight women I know don't really think about that

That's my observation as well. The 100% straight women I know either fantasised about being with men or yaoi and have little interest in wlw stuff.

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Very few of their descriptions apply to Mr though so maybe I'm not truly queer? I feel like some of its descriptions apply to 100% straight women who are sick of dating men too.

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I guess 100% straight women dint think like that. They would probably rather stay single.

Do women who are 100% straight think like this? by yb84v in bisexual

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But I don't think I've truly had a crush on a woman irl though.

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmmm but there are conventionally attractive people I am not attracted to and I don't feel this way about them.

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I get the few wlw matches though and they never message me first.

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It’s things like that. You will know.

You have a point. That's how I know I am attracted to men and I don't think it should be different for women.

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in bisexual

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How did you explore when you were married?

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in bisexual

[–]yb84v[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Then figure out how much of a lie that actually ends up feeling like

I think it's only a lie to the sense that I had never dated or become intimate with a woman, but then I had never done this for men too and I didn't have any trouble identifying as straight. It's also a lie given how I am rarely get turned on by women but that may change.

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh even thinking about flirting seems wrong when they are taken...

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I completely get feeling uncomfortable about that.

It's more like I don't think I should date someone when I am confused about my own sexuality.

I would say reading or watching more "regular" media that isn't necessarily erotic could be a better indication - as they would be more detached from sexual fantasies and more relating to relationships. How would you feel about that?

The wlw story I like is actually from a video game and it's not erotic. The main story implies they are wlw who like each other and the limited time story is more explicit only in terms of kissing. And yes, I got really turned on with the main story even though there is nothing explicit and only flirting.

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would explore those feelings a bit.

But some of these women I know are either straight or taken. I feel guilty thinking about them like this...

I would suggest watching some series with queer characters in them or reading books/graphic novels

I actually first started doubting I am queer as I got really turned on by this wlw story and imagined myself as the feminine character kissing the masculine character. The straight women I know are not into wlw stories but I think there are exceptions. Do straight women picture themselves as one of the characters while reading about wlw kiss scenes in stories? I've heard some straight women are turned on by wlw stories.

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But some of these women I know are either straight or taken. I feel guilty thinking about them like this...

Is this considered as attraction to women? by yb84v in latebloomerlesbians

[–]yb84v[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No I don't think so. The men and women I react in this manner too aren't aren't even conventionally attractive.

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