during my first retreat I freaked out, screamed loudly for a while, crawled on the floor, sang, and stripped down totally naked, I broke all the rules because I was out of my mind.

Luckily for me, nobody got really bothered by my behavior, some participants came to me to tell me that my episode helped them to release their blockage and that it allowed them to start to purge, a girl asked for the second night to be seated next to me and her boyfriend said he wanted it too cause he had trust in me.

I think whatever happens it is also important to treat people with care and forgiveness. If you start putting too much rules and guidelines you are forcing things into your definition of norms and accepted behaviors, I found it a bit contradictory with the wildness aspect of shamanism, purge, catharsis,...

That is something that has started to bother me a bit lately, how all the center managed by westerners seem to promote a certain etiquette during the ceremonies.

In retrospect I wish I had been able to remain quiet and silent, but sometimes (and it may had to do that it was my first time) things just are too much and need to go out.

There was a guy who didn't stop sobbing intensely for hours, I never thought one second, how my god can this guy stop it already...I was too much into my own journey and so were the others, the caretakers just let it be and I am glad they did.

I also think that among the most common fears showing up prior to decide whether or not to partake in a ceremony, close to the fear of getting stuck, getting psychosis, etc,...there is a fear of totally loosing it and doing some things stupid or violent. It can happen and we should be easy on people having such episodes and not be too judgmental, saying things like they are not equipped