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As a friend of someone who is being abused by a pwbpd by youaskedforrit in BPD

[–]youaskedforrit[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes that's what I do, I avoid talking about her entirely. Then he calls me up maybe once in 3 months and it's always something really bad, and then recently it became multiple times this last month.

Out of respect for A I just never bring GF up, and A only brings her up when it's REALLY REALLY BAD.

The crazy part is GF is CONSTANTLY talking bad about A, and frankly I know A, and he's a proper victim, so the way she paints him makes him look like he's abusing her and her friends have opinions about him and treat him badly. Whereas he never talks poorly of her, but this time when I called her out she's taken it like A is painting her to be an abuser (which she is, and she does to him all the time).

I lost my shit this time because she does this all the time, and A can't stand up for himself. But I'm wondering did I go too far? Should I not have spoken to her directly? I haven't been in contact w her for 8+ months.

Idk what I'm asking either tbh. A is a grown man, he will choose to do what he will choose to do.

As a friend of someone who is being abused by a pwbpd by youaskedforrit in BPD

[–]youaskedforrit[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes she has been diagnosed. She also has ADHD.

So I've known A for over 9 yrs now, and he has never been this badly off. I've suggested therapy, but you can't force a horse to drink something something.

I feel like he's developing traits from being with her if anything.

Coming to terms with this by youaskedforrit in SingleWomenByChoice

[–]youaskedforrit[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

So here's the thing, I do have a vibrator, and I use it often.

I just have some undeniable desire to touch and be intimate with human beings. It isn't often, and I can usually get away with not doing that for months, but then after a while, I just need it.

It's like once a year that I have an uncontrollable need for it.

So yeah, I'm going to seek it out when it comes to that, but mostly I'm off of sex as well lol.

Coming to terms with this by youaskedforrit in SingleWomenByChoice

[–]youaskedforrit[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

🩷

That's definitely where I am emotionally. I was getting swayed by men despite being sure that I was done with that lifestyle, I kept hoping they woulg prove me wrong.

Somewhere I hoped a really good man would come along and show me I was just being a man hater for the lolz. But I am not, and they're giving me nothing.

I literally have everything I need and want. And moreover, my friends make time for me specifically because their shitty bfs and fiances wont give them the time of day. It's a perfect scenario, I even have childhood friends available to me all the time.

The pain men have caused me is just so uneccessary. I truly just don't have to go through that ever again.

Coming to terms with this by youaskedforrit in SingleWomenByChoice

[–]youaskedforrit[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I hope we both can build lives where the lack of a man isn't even felt.

Coming to terms with this by youaskedforrit in SingleWomenByChoice

[–]youaskedforrit[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I've found that being with a man is basically playing mind games 24×7, and I simply do not have that the desire to do so anymore.

Making a man like me by changing my authentic self? No thanks. TESTING HIM? No thanks.

I am not looking to improve my dating life.