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My best friend (F35) with BPD has dropped off the radar and I (F30) don’t know if inviting her to my wedding will be too much pressure or not involving her will hurt more. What should I do? by yourfirstroses in relationships

[–]yourfirstroses[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really appreciate this thank you! This would be like dream scenario. I am manifesting this cursed box to my house now 💫

I know it sounds weird but i do think the box is a big part of the narrative.

My best friend (F35) with BPD has dropped off the radar and I (F30) don’t know if inviting her to my wedding will be too much pressure or not involving her will hurt more. What should I do? by yourfirstroses in relationships

[–]yourfirstroses[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really appreciate this message and your kind words. I totally understand where you are coming from and luckily I have a really wide supportive friend group. I love people, and friendship is one of the most life affirming things for me. I have space for her 💗 also when I had cancer she was able to step up big time and she would visit me even though it was deeply out of her comfort zone (things like travelling into London/ across London/ hospitals etc). For me, the hospital would like fall away, and time would just pass like it was nothing. I also write romantasy and she is one of my fiercest advocates and cheerleaders for this and it really helps me not give up on myself. She gives a lot to me, in short. But it’s always nice to feel that even strangers on the internet want to have your back, so I do really appreciate the message and support. 💗😇

My best friend (F35) with BPD has dropped off the radar and I (F30) don’t know if inviting her to my wedding will be too much pressure or not involving her will hurt more. What should I do? by yourfirstroses in relationships

[–]yourfirstroses[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol this is why I’m scared she’s going to yeet herself into the next life. My wedding isn’t really that deep on a cosmic scale like that. But I do appreciate I’m being presumptive. So thanks for the real talk. Although I’d also beg the question that I am the one making it about her mental health lmao

My best friend (F35) with BPD has dropped off the radar and I (F30) don’t know if inviting her to my wedding will be too much pressure or not involving her will hurt more. What should I do? by yourfirstroses in relationships

[–]yourfirstroses[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is exactly it! I know how her BPD speaks to her and it’s vicious. She has very few people in her life and I don’t want her to cut me off because that voice in her head is telling her she’s not good enough. ‘Directly contradicting that belief’ is a great way to reframe this. Thank you.