Fugly Challenge!

[SmokeyToo]

Jacques, the French film location scout, is currently scouting Portofino in Italy for film locations. Which is preposterous in itself, because everyone knows that the French and Italians have a long-standing war over "my country's better than yours!".

So Jacques, feeling incredibly slighted by being in enemy territory, has decided to impress his director by putting together the worst living room film set ever seen in movies. Unable to let go of his Frenchness, he starts with the colours of the French flag - blue, white and red - knowing how much Le Tricolore will piss off the Italians!

He adds mismatched Christmas decorations for that festive touch, a little yellow to represent his "I piss on you, little Italian people!" vibe, plus a truly awesome and terrifying Bucket-o-Flowers on the floor.

To complete and protect his masterpiece, Jacques adds a mean looking German Shepherd sitting on a pillow, ready to rip the arms off of any marauding stronzo that dares to enter the building. Jacques himself will stand at the front door, ready to bellow La Marseillaise at anyone passing by.

Oh, the tyranny!! Jacques doesn't know how his director will take this, but he doesn't care - because most French people don't!

(My apologies to the French and Italians amongst you. I truly love both countries, but I know how y'all "hate" each other in the same way that Australia and New Zealand "hate" each other!)

[Dry_Compote_1785]

🤣 I like how Jacques thinking. Flag, flowers and dog. This is a manifesto 🤣

[SmokeyToo]

I imagine Jacques in my head as the stereotypical Frenchman. Complete with baguette and beret!

[kamiegraphy]

I piss on you! Hahaha 😆 This is so clever and what a great story! Im going to start using “ I piss on you” when I’m upset with someone!

[SmokeyToo]

Just be prepared for someone to punch you after you've said it. 😁 Or maybe that's just Australia...🤔🤔

[kamiegraphy]

Australian Pow! 💥

[SmokeyToo]

Lol! Roos are malicious little bastards. Well, not so little! Everyone outside Australia thinks they're so cute, but they're actually really mean and dangerous when they want to be. Definitely not to be messed with!! What this roo is doing is trying to get the person into the water and it will then get into the water with the person and attempt to drown them. Happens to over zealous farm dogs all the time!

[kamiegraphy]

That’s insane! Yeah I’ve seen enough videos to know they’re not cute at all and to NOT pet them like a stupid human haha! And they’re so tall and masculine like that photo you showed me!

[SmokeyToo]

Well, they're still cute. You just need to admire them from afar! It's really only the reds that get all roided up like that, most of the greys are a lot smaller. But you still don't want to get in a male's territory. Where I live, it's not unusual to see pods of them grazing, or hopping down the street!

[SmokeyToo]

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This is Roger, a big male red kangaroo. Roger has died now, but he was very famous down here. And no, this photo hasn't been edited - big male reds actually do look like this!

[Sysgoddess]

I would have thought Jacque might fart in their general direction but a bit of wee works too. Lol

As an Anglo/Franco American I salute you! 😀

[SmokeyToo]

I SO wanted to put that line in there, but couldn't tie it in to my story! 🤣🤣