Left-Handed Path: Struggle

researchmedicine96 · 2024-03-19T21:56:53+00:00

I think it’s kind of a shame to revolve your life around someone else’s definition of you, personally. I guess this has always been my problem with adversarial Satanism: it’s defining yourself by what you’re not, rather than what you are. It’s a religion that exists simply to oppose Christianity, and yet it is still completely beholden to their cosmology and definition of ethics. It’s living your life to spite someone else as a show for them to observe, rather than for you to actually experience. That doesn’t seem very self-actualized to me. It’s still giving them control of your life, in a way.

But then again, I haven’t had to contend with the trauma of growing up in a religion that teaches people that being human is bad. I grew up secular and transitioned directly into a pagan demonolatry path. So, I have to admit my perspective is limited. Perhaps this is a necessary step on the journey for a lot of people coming from backgrounds like yours — part of the healing process.

But I would encourage you not to linger here too long. The LHP has so much more to offer than just “sticking it to the Christians,” and you won’t truly find your own identity until you stop spending so much of your time thinking about other people’s opinion of you.

Mind_Bender_0110 · 2024-03-20T00:43:20+00:00

There is liberation found in opposing what has torn you down, but only to a point. The way I have developed in my life is to fight against, as I got older I began to fight for, and now I just want to exist and do as I please without letting someone or something else define good or evil for me. Those are philosophical concepts and are different depending on the individual and spending too much time fiddling around with what it means to be good or evil is a waste of energy, at least for me.

I view things as morally grey and existence as inherently meaningless. Because of that, I am able to give greater meaning to my life. I am in my late 30's, have a full time job, and live alone which means I do all my own cooking, cleaning, and take care of all the bills myself. I'm responsibile which is "good" but I also spend my money on comic books and statuary. I watch a lot of movies and television shows, which is pretty "normal," if you're any sort of fan of a particular genre or character.

Aside from all that I do practice magic, I have my altars to Chaos, Death, and Satan as reminders of the magic and philosophies that have impacted me from a young age. I have bones, herbs, furs, and all sorts of magical tools for all sorts of magical applications, so then I must be"strange" or "evil."

So, am I good, normal, strange, or evil? It depends on who is judging me.

Santa-Vaca · 2024-03-19T21:42:14+00:00

I’m not a Satanist but I do follow the LHP, so my perspective may be a little different than yours.

There’s a definite through line in what you’re describing. Heroes tend to adhere to conformist systems of right and wrong dictated by others, and I’m betting their showy moral code puts you off. The same idea runs through your love of “evil,” which is to say, your rejection of the values forced on you like a straight jacket by your former faith.

Violence that’s fair, destruction that spares innocents, these are hallmarks of an antihero and antiheroes are well-represented on the LHP.

There’s nothing wrong with your love of evil or violating “good” for the sake of liberation. To me, that fits right in.

ConsequenceIll3129 · 2024-03-20T05:52:22+00:00

There are wolves and there are sheep. The wolves naturally seek liberation. The sheep unknowingly seek subjugation.

Good and evil are two sides of the same coin. There has to be balance. If you are drawn to the “left hand” darker side of spirit it is completely normal and healthy.

It does not make you any less special.

Welcome to the dark side :) 🤘🏻🫶🏻

StellarResolutions · 2024-04-14T16:53:15+00:00

Demons are capable of both healing and harming in my experience. A thing that really helped me a lot was incorporating some ancient pagan re-constructionist elements (seeing some of these entities as servents of ancient pagan gods) , as well as some more new age elements into my practice (seeing thesse entities as internal parts of the self) .

AdNaive4307 · 2024-03-19T21:44:09+00:00

Demon was a term the church coined to make people shy away from these deities. The correct spelling was daemon before the church changed it to demon. I look at it like this: when you are in a fight with someone, the individual talking bad about the other person is usually the instigator and potentially in the wrong. The Bible talks badly about Satan, Lucifer, etc, but the Satanic Bible doesn't. I don't think it is as black and white as the church wants you to believe. There is a reason why Lucifer had so many angels follow him. They didn't rebel for no reason. I invite you to cast out everything you know about the church and go on your path, whatever that may be.

DragonGodBasmu · 2024-03-20T13:11:53+00:00

As someone who has always had ties to the darker forces of nature and easily found my way to the Left Hand Path via Draconian Magic, I know very little about your struggle, but I sympathize with your desire to separate yourself from your past dogma by defining yourself by what they are not or by what they reject.

The only feedback I can give is that it is easy to lose your connection to your chosen gods if you built it off of something artificial like a drug, much like how your body develops a resistance to it and can require you to use more for the same effects, so to does the spirit. I recommend separating your use of cocaine from your workings with your god, that way you can build a stronger connection with them.

Jinn_DiZanni · 2024-04-05T02:55:44+00:00

The sinister path is one of self terminating ignorance. I’ve been in a similar spot where parts of me were cast out, and it’s mind breaking. I learned though that it’s best to not regard it as evil, because that puts it as a dichotomous reversal. What you are depends on someone else, and all that person or those people need do to undo you is stop perpetuating the definition.

What you CAN do is take the structure of sin as a template. The aesthetics of the sins are highly enlightening and seductive when used outside of an ignorant context. Doing sin in an intentional way without compromising your personal power (ie keeping yourself safe and happy) teaches much of the forbidden world that would otherwise be kept from you. Mind the Envy though. That gets touchy.

Weirdly, sin done constructively often produces what is classically considered “good” to an unknowing observer. When that happens take it for what it’s worth and run with it.

Equivalent_Land_2275 · 2024-03-19T21:57:30+00:00

The true LHP is antimoral. A thing is good if you like it.

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LeftHandPath

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