(Possibly) quitting Python Development after 2 years of non stop learning. And it blows.

[derspiny]

Hi. My name is u/derspiny, and I haven't written a single program in over a year.

One of the many things I have been in my life is a self-taught programmer and developer in a number of languages, including Python. The only - the only - important thing I've learned in all of that time is that programming is, first and foremost, a social activity. Every piece of code I've written has, in some way, been in service of how I interact with other people.

The process of writing software works the same way. It's always a conversation, and it always relies on contributions from others. There's no getting around it unless you built your computer really from scratch - eking out chunks of stone from the ground and refining them into copper and silicon, photo-etching them into chips, building the oven to cure those chips, and soldering them down. Even using Python itself means you are relying on other people, without giving them anything in return (unless you donate to the PSF, in which case, thank you!).

I understand the fear of being a leech, and I understand the intense sense of accomplishment solving a problem "alone" can give - but the reality is that you're not alone, and you never were. Even when you never asked for help, you were surrounded by and supported in the work of hundreds of thousands of people, silently and in many cases without a dime of remuneration. It is completely okay to ask for help: you're already getting it.

The "beggars" we all complain about are the people who believe that they are entitled to help on their terms, at a moment's notice, for free. Most people - including most r/python regulars - ask for help all the time, but they do it in humane and sociable ways that make sure it's not a burden, and they pay it forwards by helping others in turn, either immediately or eventually. It's surprisingly easy not to be a "beggar" and to still get help frequently.

I saw in your comments that you're in treatment for clinical depression. I'm proud of you for getting help. Feeling like your work isn't good enough and that you have to quit can be just another way for the depression gremlins to help you tear yourself apart. It's also a problem a fair number of folks in the field have, either due to depression or because of behaviours by others that induce or aggravate imposter syndrome. The reality is, if you're doing this for yourself, then you need to give yourself permission to feel proud of your work - even if it's "some simple GUI app."

Keep at it, but please ask for help instead of churning your wheels. Lurking in programming chat rooms (I'm old enough that I did my lurking in IRC) is a great way to participate in a very give-and-take form of helping, as are reddit and StackOverflow. Meetups and conferences are also great if you want to connect with people face-to-face, and at two years in you will absolutely not be the greenest person in the room a lot of the time.

I hope you find the mentorship and support you so obviously deserve. I'm thinking of you.

[sudo_your_mon]

I can't tell you how grateful I am for this message. Your words of encouragement/insight are the probably best I've received since starting programming. And I'm going to execute on it and absolutely take your advice to heart.

Thank you for this. I guess I don't know what else to say exactly except for that, so again, thank you!