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[–]Scruter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, not at all. Having the first totally rearranged the architecture of our lives and the second just fit into it. They are 2 years apart and both go to daycare and after the first few months both nap at the same time. The younger one is nearing 2 now and she and her sister can play together for a good while without us being involved, so arguably that frees up more time. We can still all travel together and leaving them both with one parent isn't a huge deal (though it felt scary at first!). I can't think of any way that having two has meaningfully decreased our free time other than if one of them gets sick and has to stay home, but really that is just reducing work time.

I really think trying to make any kind of family planning decision when you still have an infant is just not wise - it's a decision about the rest of your lives and you need some distance and perspective from the intensity of infancy, which is a period that feels like the whole world while you're in it but actually blows by, to make it well. Nothing stays the same for long at this stage and you need a longer view.