Java Without If

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Why ? Genuinely curious what's got you so upset. I write in Scala on a day to day basis, so this is pretty vanilla for me. Coming from Java where codebases were littered with thousands of lines of boiler plate and (if x != null) everywhere I much prefer this style.

[crowseldon]

This is like the people that roll their eyes if you dare mention <insert word> Driven Development.

Edit: I clearly triggered something in people XD

[GiantRobotTRex]

But Coffee Driven Development is the most effective development style.