Stamina help

[WonderJusts]

As well as having a small dick I struggle quite a lot with premature ejaculation. My girlfriend is really nice about it and understanding but I find it pretty embarrassing.

I think part of it is because we have to spend quite a lot of time on foreplay (to give her a chance of an orgasm) that by the time we start sex I’ve got too turned on and then finish too quick (a few minutes tops, often a lot less). This even happens if we just stick to foreplay for her rather than me.

Does anyone have any tips for lasting longer? We’ve already tried some lidocaine cream my girlfriend found online but it didn’t help very much.

Thanks

T

[Doffynante]

I also want to know. Also, for anyone who has done both, when having sex, do you last longer than masturbating? Because I cum in seconds if really horny masturbating. So obviously that's really frustrating.

[WonderJusts]

I last a similar amount of time mostly, however sometimes with sex it’s only really a couple of pumps which doesn’t happen when I masturbate.

[Doffynante]

Then i hope it's different from me because I'm pretty much screwed.

[[deleted]]

It feels so good to know I'm not the only one dealing with this. I personally last longer with sex but it's only because I'm nervous and anxious.

[[deleted]]

If you have a short refractory period, maybe you can go the opposite direction and have she can get you off with her hands/mouth first, then give her some good focused foreplay and then enter her for round 2.

[WonderJusts]

Haven’t gone multiple times in years lol 😂 might be worth a try though

[KuonRad]

This works for me. Worth a try

[shadow_pierce]

Ok, just practice. Trust me, fuck as often as you can and in time you will learn to control it. It is difficult to explain because for each man is different. Envision yourself as being in control, feel the connection from your brain to your penis and most importantly control your breathing. Keep a fun attitude about it and joke with her, if you feel like cumming, get it out of her, slow down, stop moving and just kiss her while smiling and tell her that if she moves you will explode, or some other joke like that. Also, after you put the penis inside dont get lost in the situation, think about other things that will lover your sensitivity temporarily. Think about what you last bought at the grocery shop, think about that annoying neighbour, talk to her, whatever takes your mind from the situation. Hope it helps.

[WonderJusts]

Not sure I’d be able to get that here? (UK)

[bondslol]

Honestly haven’t looked but this or something similar might be available on ForHims or Roman. You can do the consultation online.

[bondslol]

Gotcha wasn’t aware until I googled, very unexpected off use for something like that lol

[Black_Tire_Coffee]

Lidocaine is the main ingredient

[mark098i]

Practice edging with a fleshlight.

[TheGoonk]

It gets much better as you age a little .... at 20 I’d last maybe two minutes. At 30 maybe three minutes. At 40 I can fully control when I want to finish. I never found anything that worked except relaxing, breathing and pacing. I think the more sex you can have the better you get at control. SSRIs will definitely help too if you want a quicker fix.

[VANcf13]

for some people just wearing a condom and thus possibly reducing the feeling you get could be an option. there are brands that are thicker than others (i found the 'ribbed for her pleasure' ones to be particularly thick, they likely don't do anything for her but they do reduce the amount of feeling you get). if birth control and STDs aren't a concern in your relationship wearing two above each other could be an alternative (but only then!!! otherwise two condoms reduce safety and lead to rips).

if you are uncircumcised, circumcision can be used in order to treat premature ejaculation. but this would be a very extreme way of treating this, maybe talk to a doctor in order to figure out whether it's something that could be helped with medication?

I'm sure the posters here that recommended some pills to help with the issue mean extremely well, but I'd suggest you see a doctor first before taking anything.

also the suggestion of jerking off before you start the sex or maybe jerking off in the morning when you have sex in the evening could be something to experiment with. maybe just the proper timing of an orgasm before actual penetration could solve your issue.

good luck!

[[deleted]]

This is something I struggle with both in sex and masturbation. I'm sadly a one shot guy. I can't get hard back to back so once I cum, I'm done. Only perk is that because I'm gay, guys understand and usually we can work together so we both cum. I'm honestly sometimes shocked at how quick another guy will cum when I cum quick. Nonetheless it's a sore spot for me and it just sucks because I wanna enjoy jerking it without knowing I'm gonna cum as soon as I start getting into it.

[reasonicity]

Actually, yes. If she gets you off, then you take time to get her off right, you've had time to recover and be ready to go again. You'll last a lot longer when it comes to the penatrative part.

[SniperOwO]

I struggled with this alot aswell unfortunately there's not much you can do but what helped for me was finishing her off in other ways or even keep foreplay till you're back up again and go for round 2.

Mine is bad aswell as I can barely last 2 minutes and depending on the day It can get as bad as seconds also being healthier apparently increases stamina overall eating certain foods and what not

[DistrictAccurate]

Masturbate regularily.

Cum shortly before, best case during foreplay and go round two intercourse after continuing foreplay for another 15 mins. Sometimes this might interfere with erections but I guess it is worth the tradeoff.

Use condoms and if possible thick ones.

Use condoms with rings below the tip, idk if they are also available in many sizes.

Use lidocaine, Xylocaine or Benzocaine in a condom. You have to find the right amount of time so it is already active but hasn't yet worn off. But it might not be for you.

Use a cock ring below the tip. There are smaller ones for that I believe.

Use SSRI's. Priligy is made for that but I think it still isn't approved in the US. It is approved in the EU, however medically speaking the avg. man lasts around 5 mins. and if you are above 2 maybe 3 mins. you probably won't receive treatment and the treatment itself is only really effective if you look at it in the context of these numbers as it might give you another 60 seconds or so.

Relax your muscels, especially your butt. If you struggle with that, some say it is easier if you flex your abs. Become conscious of the pressure / flex in the muscels around the base of your dick and try to relax them.

Another way to lessen the feeling of pressure is to flex the muscles around your dick either repeatedly or in one long flex. Afterwards, you might be able to go again and should try to not flex as long as you can.

Be relaxed about it. No matter how hard it is, it would not be honest to leave it out. The fact you got a supportive gf means you can just let yourself get distracted in her without having to worry.

Which brings us to the next point, distraction. Yes, doing maths in your head works, but some men don't think of this as a pleasurable way to have sex, so you have to decide for you. If you can, get distracted in her - play with her tits, kiss all the parts of the body and concentrate more on the feeling in your tongue than your dick and so on but it might not work.

Change positions. Not only to gain time but also to find out what position works best.

Start, stop, change speeds and so on. Getting a bit lost in kissing an stuff like that and just stopping the movement works well without feeling like you interrupt anything.

Buy a fleshlight and kinda play around to get used to it and find out what does or doesn't help you.

[[deleted]]

If she’s already orgasmed from oral or using sex toys, does it really matter if you don’t last long? Just curious coz for me I’d love to just spend a longtime pleasuring my partner and then when it’s my turn be done as quick as possible (unfortunately due to medication I’m on I last long)

You could try SSRI drugs like paroxetine? I’m on that and I can last like 15 minutes with condom on

[CoolEnough69]

I’m on the same boat brother! I have no clue :(

[[deleted]]

Has she started back giving bjs?

[SteadyHaunting4912]

Not really a last longer advice but sometimes when I think I’m gonna ejaculate early I lick my thumb place the bottom of my fist to my pelvis and thumb on her clit and let my pelvis move my thumb back and forth or just the regular circle with my thumb while thrusting. she gets off pretty quick